Screaming child visiting during lockdown...

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We have new next door neighbours and they have a balcony that overlooks the garden. Over the last couple of weeks, another couple with a small child visit their garden for 1-3 hours a day. Our neighbour sits on the balcony and chats to the visitors whilst they use the garden/paddling pool.

Their kid screams constantly. The parents chase the kid to make it scream, and do absolutely nothing to stop it screaming... they almost encourage it.

My two issues:

1. I assume this is against lockdown rules? But if they are coming from a flat and/or have no outside space, I do understand why they'd do this. Especially when the weather is nice.

However....

1. The screaming is driving me mad. I have a 7 month old DD and it's waking her up from naps and I can hear it inside with windows /doors closed... it's relentless and not limited to warm days, they come nearly every day. I don't Kline shouting/laughing etc.. all kids make noise, but the screaming constantly is horrendous!

I'm not confrontational and if I didn't have a child, I'd probably just turn they tv/radio up and ignore it. But lockdown is hard enough without an overtired baby!

AIBU to find this pretty unacceptable...? Tbh I'm such a wimp I'd probably never say anything, but need to vent!

YANBU but could you try playing white noise whilst your baby sleeps? I have a baby and an older child with ASD who is very noisy and the white noise screens all his noise and allows baby to sleep.

Totally unacceptable! You’ll probably get flamed as a child hating monster but a child who screams is awful.
I had my DHs family visiting for 3 weeks a couple years ago and their 3 year old screamed bloody murder all day every day. I nearly had a breakdown.

Confront fgs!

Tell them that IF they insist on breaking lockdown every single day and allow their child to announce to the neighbours via the screaming that a complaint will be put in and they can explain to the police wtf they’re thinking...

Or just call 101. If they come over every day it’ll be easy to arrange that they are busted....

Here’s a crazy idea - why not assume they’re just normal people like you and have an actual conversation with them?

Why “confront”? Why not just politely explain the noise is disturbing you so can they keep it down

I couldn't get upset about them using a garden at a distance from the owners. Annoying for you though.

I would assume that it is a relative without outdoor space. You can ask them to keep the noise down. I think 1hour is not too bad to be honest but 3 might be a bit different!

Jesus OP, this would drive me insane can you not politely speak to the neighbour and ask them to calm things down a bit?

Some people have DC who are screamers - it's really really annoying, but they can't stop it. I'm lucky my DS isn't a screamer but I have friends with one and they're at their wits' end trying to contain the noise so their neighbours don't go crazy, especially during lockdown.

Maybe the child's parents are taking him/her to your neighbour to give their own neighbours some respite?

Anyway, you can mention it - perhaps they're just unaware of how loud it is and can go elsewhere - but be prepared to be told they can't or won't do anything.

Ask them to be quiet ? It’s not dreadful that they’re in the garden if they’re respectful of everyone .

under normal circumstances, I'd tell them to shut up

Under current circumstances, take advantage of the police state and report them.

Option A) ask nicely if the screaming can be controlled.

Option B) join in with screaming. It works with humming teenagers anyway!

Option C) report. I couldn't be bothered to report a regular household visiting. A flow of people or crowd coming in and out would be different, but taking the piss by visiting and disturbing neighbours is not on.

Sorry 'confront' was perhaps the wrong word. I think my worry is that I'll mention something politely and they'll be rude/awkward back... they only moved in just before lockdown so I don't know them at all!

Their balcony looks right over our garden, as well as theirs, so I wouldn't want any animosity as we use it a lot when it's warm.

I totally get some kids are screamers.. but they chase him around / play games where the dad 'Roars' etc and the child goes crazy! I don't think they're trying to stop it at all!

Screaming or just excited child noise (if it makes the same noise when the parents play with it)? Annoying yes, but bear in mind, give it 2 years and you'll be the one with the shrieking child in the garden.....

it's really really annoying, but they can't stop it Of course they can! My kids quickly learn that after 3 warnings, they would have to come back indoors. It happened a few times until they learned. Problem is some parents are too lazy to carry discipline through and then justify their fayre by trying to convince everyone that it's not their fault because they are helpless!

OP, it's ok to say something it really is although sadly, unlikely to make much of a difference even if they act as if they care.

This would drive me mad. Allowing a child to scream like that is utterly anti-social. They must know how loud the child is and how annoying it is. I'd struggle to know how to phrase it too but could you say something to your neighbour along the lines of, "Could you please let me know when your visitors are going to arrive so that I can get myself and my baby out of the house? She's not coping with the constant disruption and lack of sleep". See how your neighbour responds. They are the ones in the wrong, not you, but of course they may become embarrassed and defensive so be prepared for that.

Ok then, have you actually asked them to keep it down?

The parents are chasing the kid, so go out and ask them to be mindful that the noise is unacceptable in any situation and worse in lockdown

“I’m sorry, but this screaming is unacceptably loud and disturbing. It’s been every day for weeks and it needs to stop. Now.”

Inform their neighbours that you’ve had enough and that you had hoped it would end, before now but it hasn’t and as the lockdown is extended, you have to make sure that this situation won’t continue.

They need to go home and stay home.

Sounds like they are encouraging the child to get it out of his system outdoors rather than in their flat, and trying to tire him out?

Does your daughter nap at roughly the same times? Maybe you could say "My daughter sleeps from about 11 to 1; do you think you could ask your friends to come at a different time or keep the noise down then?" Maybe preface it with some praise about how lovely it is of them to let their friends use the garden.

Am I right in thinking that you have one small baby and that your neighbours have no children (I guess these are their grandchildren?). If so, I'd be very wary of making a big fuss about toddler noise before you have a toddler as that could come back to bite you hard...

“I’m sorry, but this screaming is unacceptably loud and disturbing. It’s been every day for weeks and it needs to stop. Now.”

Why would you start that confrontational? That's surely what you escalate to if asking them politely to keep the noise down doesn't work? You must make life very hard for yourself (and everyone else) if that's your go-to.

"but they chase him around / play games where the dad 'Roars' etc and the child goes crazy! I don't think they're trying to stop it at all!"

oh that's the worst. I'd have yelled "shut the fuck up already" ages ago.

Just speak to them and explain the issues it is causing you, at the same time be understanding about why the child is there running around and they will likely acknowledge the issue and do something about it.

They probably just haven't considered other people, thoughtlessly rather than selfishly.

Hopefully they will all catch it and die.

Because they are playing with their child in an outside space and socially distancing? Wtf

Just ask them op, they probably arent aware they are disturbing you, everyone is just trying to do their best in a shit situation, and the majority of people are reasonable.

"thoughtlessly rather than selfishly"

same difference. "I didn't think" is just alt speak for "I'm a selfish arse".