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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think some people need to get a grip!

394 replies

CurrentBun1981 · 16/04/2020 11:07

There are clearly those who are being far too nonchalant about the current situation, but tbh I'm probably encountering more of the slightly hysterical/OTT types right now.

For example, my friend has been frantically discussing on FB how best to sterilise her shopping and has implemented some ridiculously elaborate system of debagging shopping in the garage, putting the bags in the outside bin, wiping everything down with sanitising wipes, then walking back to put these in the bin too, before then leaving everything in quarantine for a couple days in the garage fridge. She's now worried about whether she's already brought the virus into the house on her shoes or her dog as she hadn't thought of that till she read it, and is discussing this on FB right now, trying to make another process involving outdoor footwear, indoor footwear, and 'transitional' footwear (presumably slippers from garage into house or something).

Her view is that she wants to go 110% in ensuring she doesn't catch it, which is fine. However, she doesn't do anything like this in any other areas of her life, which I suspect is the same thing for many others acting similarly.

For example, I've never seen her check the tyre pressure on her car and am 100% certain she doesn't do this weekly as is recommended. I'm pretty certain she doesn't know the legal tread depth and how to check it as she often needs new tyres at MOT stage (presumably illegally low on tread at this point).

What is it about this recent crisis that's invoking fear in the types of people who rarely use their car mirrors except to check their make up?

I'll concede that theoretically you could probably bring the virus into your house on your feet if you stepped in somebody's spit etc, but the likelihood has got to be tiny, and this is all ultimately to avoid catching a disease which will give the majority of victims 'mild' symptoms and is statistically extremely unlikely to kill her in the unlikely chance she catches it - I'm convinced the government might just let us crack on and catch it if it wasn't for the unmanageable strain on the NHS.

OP posts:
CurrentBun1981 · 18/04/2020 10:47

It's anabolic steroids that usuaĺly cause an increase in lean muscle. These are what my partner takes (he had the bioavailable testosterone of an 85yo in his 30s, along with high oestrogen levels, so put on weight easily).

OP posts:
Inkpaperstars · 18/04/2020 11:15

Actually Pulp I have a memory of hearing some kind of expert interviewed who said that many people do get flu asymptomatically or very mildly, so like Covid it can be present in the population to a greater extent than people realise. I remember it because it made sense to me that I have been around and about for many years but never as far as I know had flu.

bemusedmoose · 18/04/2020 11:31

To be honest - my household went down with covid before all this was a big deal in the UK so the chances are, realistically, it is already in every home and was long before lock down.

If it makes them feel better just let them be but honestly I think it's like useful as a chocolate teapot. The government acted far too late to get on top of it. They had plenty of warning, could see what was happening and choose to just let it flood in. Its here to stay and although I do take precautions and obey lock down rules I honestly don't think washing every thing will help (unless you literally have a decontamination unit fitted to the front of your house and nothing comes in our goes out without being steamed - people, clothes, pets, air, shopping... and of course the entire contents of the house, streets, car...) people fear what they cant see or prevent. This is how people with OCD fear every day! In fact they might actually be the calmest right now - because they have being coping with this level of fear their whole lives.

Refereenotamum · 18/04/2020 11:36

I know of someone who has died after being indoors with zero contact for 20 days before her symptoms started to show apart from her shopping being left at her front door for her so the virus must have came in on her supplies so cleaning your shopping isn’t over the top

Winteriscomingnow · 18/04/2020 11:40

I have two reasons for doing the 110% to avoid getting this virus. One reason is selfish (for me) and the other is selfless ( the NHS)

I appreciate I will have to get it at some point. I can’t wash my shopping for 2 years or yes I will go mad. This virus is new, we don’t have any treatment. Some healthy people are dying. We may only be immune for 3-6 months after having it the first time. It may take 2 years to recover fully. Would I be able to fight a second wave if I’d already had it? These are rational risk based decisions based on how little we know about this new virus. They are not me being OTT or needing to get a grip! I would therefore like to do what I can to not get it for as long as I can. Yes that is selfish. If washing my shopping and leaving my shoes at the door helps me do that and I get a bit of OCD. So what.

However, it is the selfless reason that bothers me more and I am so shocked by the huge quantity of blasé people on here that talk about getting the virus as their own problem. IT IS NOT!!!

I want to delay getting this virus for as long as I can - because by delaying it, maybe, just maybe, we might have proper PPE stocks for our doctors and nurses, proper tests and treatments for those amazing people who are putting their health on the line for us. I have a 100% clear conscience. I have done 100% what I can. If I end up in hospital and end up giving COVID-19 to my under-protected ICU nurse or ambulance driver, I will have a clear conscience.

My other reason for being selfless is for other key workers. My friend who works for Tesco. My sister who works for DWP. My best friend who is a teacher and looking after vulnerable kids. My aunt who works in social care.
I am lucky and have a car so only shop once every 2 weeks
I am lucky and am workIng from home
I am trying to stay so far out of the equation that I don’t get it. Other key workers can’t do that. If they get it, it won’t be me competing for the same medical care at the same time. There will be enough ventilators and ICU beds because I am not blasé about it just being flu.

My neighbour has had it. She is 40. No underlying health issues. She wasn’t even ventilated just had oxygen in hospital. A month later, she is still breathless with any level of exertion. I will carry on doing my 110% thank you very much!!

BlueGheko · 18/04/2020 12:04

I've attached a photo I took from a webinar I was watching last night. It's a slide stating how long Sars-coV-2 can last on fomites. Note though that there is as yet no evidence humans can be infected this way and droplet spread is still by far the most likely route of infection. The length of time just means the virus can be swabbed from a fomite and does not mean we can be infected by touching said fomites. Plus if we're all washing our hands sensibly the chances of catching the virus this way are very very slim.

To think some people need to get a grip!
BlueGheko · 18/04/2020 12:08

Photo didn't attach but basically

Aerosols 3hrs
Cardboard 3-24 hrs
Cloth 1 day
Banknote 2 days
Plastic 2-3 days
Stainless steel 3-4 days
Masks 7 days!

cloudspotter · 18/04/2020 12:11

@Winteriscomingnow

Hear hear!

I for one am glad that it looks like most people are following the guidance, even if it seems over the top.

I think most of us are trying to avoid getting it not only as a selfish thing, but to avoid being one of a herd of people putting pressure on essential services at a time where they are needed for someone else.

Sure, I don't want to die. But I know that's unlikely. However, I do not want to be radiating COVID germs unknowingly for someone else more vulnerable to catch. Someone's mother, father, vulnerable child. Nor do I want to be occupying a hospital bed/ICU bed which could keep someone else alive who has had a worse roll of the dice in this world than me.

I particularly hate the "I'm alright Jacks" who in their smugness at being a slim, non-smoking gym bunny feel they have earned the entitlement to lord it over others. Others who they secretly feel deserve a kind of natural justice for not being so bloody perfectly self-obsessed to have remained an ideal weight, or who smoked.

This sort of self-righteousness is not too far removed from eugenics or other kinds of social cleansing. The way they talk, it sounds like they are secretly pleased at the ongoing cull of less healthy individuals than themselves.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 18/04/2020 12:57

I for one am glad that it looks like most people are following the guidance, even if it seems over the top.

Fine if it's what you want to do but I haven't seen any official guidance saying we should be washing shopping and deliveries.

Pulpfiction1 · 18/04/2020 12:59

Actually Pulp I have a memory of hearing some kind of expert interviewed who said that many people do get flu asymptomatically or very mildly, so like Covid it can be present in the population to a greater extent than people realise. I remember it because it made sense to me that I have been around and about for many years but never as far as I know had flu.

But doesn't that support the idea that this hysteria around covid is unnecessary. Flu is circulating all the time. Flu can take down anyone. So why arnt people washing their shopping from fear of flu.

Hardcandy1 · 18/04/2020 13:03

@PinkSparklyPussyCat

www.rte.ie/news/coronavirus/2020/0401/1127735-coronavirus-washing/

Pulpfiction1 · 18/04/2020 13:04

I particularly hate the "I'm alright Jacks" who in their smugness at being a slim, non-smoking gym bunny feel they have earned the entitlement to lord it over others. Others who they secretly feel deserve a kind of natural justice for not being so bloody perfectly self-obsessed to have remained an ideal weight, or who smoked.

Tbh I do feel a little annoyed that I am having to go into lock down and will have to live in a country in massive economic downturn to protect a large proportion of people with self inflicted bad health.

If everyone looked after there bodies the percentage of people getting seriously ill would be much lower and so the protective measures would likely be less sever.

Inkpaperstars · 18/04/2020 13:04

Yes, I think Covid is considerably worse than the flu according to doctors. But you are right that there is always a risk with packaging. I am not the best person to comment on that because I have for many years been aware of it.

Hardcandy1 · 18/04/2020 13:05

@Winteriscomingnow I agree 100% I don’t want to be a vector of transmission. By now everyone should jace seen the picture of the matches. Those of us who WFH should do our utmost to remove ourselves from the equation. Those who have to go out can’t do similar but we can by taking every precaution necessary To ensure we don’t catch it while the system is under pressure.

BigChocFrenzy · 18/04/2020 13:05

"hysteria"

If 15,000 people in the UK died within a few weeks because they didn't check their tyre pressure
or because they died of flu

then there would be panic over that too
and people would change their habits to avoid it

Personally, I don't wash my shopping or post, but I do leave it out for a couple of days
No drama, no effort on my part

It doesn't bother me if anyone washes their shopping, or if they sunbathe for 10 hours
YOu do you

Inkpaperstars · 18/04/2020 13:20

Tbh I do feel a little annoyed that I am having to go into lock down and will have to live in a country in massive economic downturn to protect a large proportion of people with self inflicted bad health.

I don't think that is what is happening. It isn't clear yet what proportion of hospital care for Covid patients is being required due to 'self inflicted' poor health. Too early to say, and very hard to quantify 'self inflicted' anyway when you take into account the physical, mental, social and financial factors that play into self care.

I doubt the measures required would be altered that much pulp.

What is known is that we cannot reliably predict the reaction someone will have to this illness. Some people over 100 with heart failure and hypertension have survived, while people in their twenties and thirties who appear fit have succumbed. One doctor said his ICU patients were relatively young and included fitness professionals. Nor do we know the risk of long term complications after mild infection.

It's reasonable to think that if you are young and fit you will probably be fine at least in the short term. It's almost certain that some people who reasonably think that will very sadly not survive. That's the same with most risks I guess.

Inkpaperstars · 18/04/2020 13:21

If 15,000 people in the UK died within a few weeks because they didn't check their tyre pressure or because they died of flu

Yes! Especially if that number was growing exponentially.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 18/04/2020 13:22

@Hardcandy1 Thanks for that, it's interesting but I'll probably wait until it's official UK government / NHS advice.

I have nowhere to leave my shopping so if they say quarantine or wash it I suppose I'll have to wash it but until then it goes in the cupboard/fridge etc as normal. It'll be soapy water only though, no way on earth will I be putting bleach near my food!

shirleybanister · 18/04/2020 13:28

@dontgobaconmyheart Bit of an over the top reaction to the op

Pulpfiction1 · 18/04/2020 13:31

I don't think that is what is happening. It isn't clear yet what proportion of hospital care for Covid patients is being required due to 'self inflicted' poor health

Really because it has been reported multiple times that overweight people are one of the biggest at risk groups. Mainly overweight men, the same people that have been told time and time again that they are at risk of strokes, heart disease, cancers and diabetes.

RoobyMyrtle · 18/04/2020 13:35

I know someone who died two days ago who had been on lockdown for 4 weeks. Their only contact with the outside world was post & online shopping delivery. They were careful but it still got them. They were in their 70s with underlying health issues & died 3 days after showing symptoms. Let people do whatever they feel the need to do.

Wannabangbang · 18/04/2020 13:37

It's all very well insulting those that are overweight or obese but it's too late for them to change it to a degree that will save them, same with smokers etc. Nothing will make a shred of difference now so there is little they can do. They are still people! Skinny or slim people aren't immune to this either and it's unfortunate men seem to be the primary target aswell. This virus has no favourites, it wants us all

Wannabangbang · 18/04/2020 13:41

pulpfiction1you are annoyed, seriously it can kill you too you know. No matter whether you are slim Jim or fatty Hatty, even if you are the fittest person on earth you can still get covid and die but of course you are annoyed and blaming the entire world that isn't perfect. Seriously have you actually watched the news lately fit people are too dying so don't think you can go walk about and think you are safe as you are very wrong.

Hardcandy1 · 18/04/2020 13:58

@PinkSparklyPussyCat yes you’re probably right after all the Irish didn’t put restrictions in for ages and went with that crazy no testing herd immunity theory that turned out to be total nonsense so if Uk aren’t advising it it’s probably not correct.... oh wait

Inkpaperstars · 18/04/2020 14:33

Yes, really pulp. We will know more in time esp with cross population comparisons that take into account criteria for hospital admissions, care protocols etc. Also as I say, defining self inflicted is problematic to say the least.

I agree that obesity is a massive public health issue. Losing weight for most (not all) people is very doable. Keeping it off is much more complex than maintaining that lower weight if they had never gained, due biological changes to hormones, muscle tissue and metabolism.