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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Are you still letting your DC play out with neighbours kids?

232 replies

LegoBloodyHurts · 14/04/2020 15:09

Are you still letting your kids play out with neighbours kids? Seems to be in my neighbourhood the kids are carrying on as normal, and out on the streets together. Mine are home as I won’t allow it.

OP posts:
BogRollBOGOF · 14/04/2020 15:55

No, but we have classmate neighbours next door and balls go flying in both directions. Attempting to police that would be a hiding to nothing against the risks. Our neighbours are sensible so I'll accept the ball exchange. Face to face and physical contact, no.

cherrybunx0 · 14/04/2020 15:59

I voted yabu because does this even need to be asked

jackparlabane · 14/04/2020 15:59

No. There's the odd small group of teens out in the park, but compared to the large groups that would meet up normally they seem to be making an effort.

Impressive, given how many live in tiny flats with no garden.

Ostagazuzulum · 14/04/2020 16:00

I'm not. I live in small
Row of houses at end of cul de sac. There are 5 other kids in our area and my DD is all good friends with them and they play out daily normally. For first few weeks everyone kept kids in. Then some of parents started letting their kids play together at weekends. My DD isn't allowed. She understands it and hasn't complained but I can see it's absolute torture for her. Even going in our garden, she can hear them all playing together or they come up shared drive and look through fence and although she's not asked to go play, it's upset her a lot. She's sitting inside mostly so she doesn't have to hear it but it's really unfair in her, especially
In this weather. I wish the other parents would think about the impact it has in my kid but also the risk to the other kids. One family isn't adhering to social Distancing at all (relatives visiting) and another family, the dad is frontline medical personnel (so he should know. One of the other families had a dd with bad asthma. I just can't get my head around it. We all get in really well but DH says if I say something it would ruin the relationship. It's just irresponsible, selfish and stupid. It's actually really Winding me up. DH and I had a fleeting conversation about whether we should let DD out to play but both agreed we'd never forgive ourselves if she or her friends got sick (we're both frontline key workers) and it sends the wrong message out to DD about sticking to rules.
I suspect people are quite blase about catching it and think it won't happen to them. But it's that attitude that will make this situation last even longer. Sadly, their attitude towards this has made me feel pretty negative towards the friendships I had with all the other parents.

Lefters · 14/04/2020 16:01

A lot of children are playing together on my road. They were all keeping to themselves but in the last week this seems to have gone out of the window. Not my kids I hasten to add.

Ostagazuzulum · 14/04/2020 16:02

In fact one of parents said to me the other day that it was no different than if they were key workers and had chosen to send their kid to school and they were socialising at school AngryI bit my tongue. From
Speaking to colleagues whose kids are having to go to school, it's not a choice it's a reluctant necessity!

BiddyPop · 14/04/2020 16:04

Absolutely not.

DD is out daily doing sports training on the large green in front of the house, and one of the evenings, her very good friend 3 doors up did the running part with her - a number of short sprints up the hill of the estate and back, which they did on opposite sides of the road, and then kicked a football between each other for 10 more minutes. Well over 2m apart (more like 25m apart).

But otherwise, even they have not had physical contact - all via SM. (They're 14).

And I don't see any DCs out playing in groups - a few playing in family groups on occasion (2-3 DCs and a parent) but usually only a single DC with a parent. And usually only 1, max of 2 groups, on the green at any 1 time.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 14/04/2020 16:04

The closest mine have been to other children were when they were playing in front of our house, and saw a teenager appear out of another house. To put it in to context... On our road, there are three families with under 5s, mine and another family with primary aged, and the one family with teenagers. The other primary family are at school 3 times a week. The other mum and I keep the kids apart and they need an adult to be out front to make sure they don't mix. We do have a back up plan in case of emergencies that one parent will watch both sets on opposite ends of the green- but that's real emergencies (both our husbands are in Army, other husband is away, mines on 3hrs notice)

chickenyhead · 14/04/2020 16:05

My kids haven't been out the front door in a month as we had symptoms. Nobody in, nobody out.

It would infuriate me if other kids were playing outside as it would highlight to my kids what they aren't being allowed to do.

It's a lack of respect, thinking rules don't apply to them.

suzilady · 14/04/2020 16:06

no way! my kids play in the garden and are told to stay away from the fence

LittleBoyJuly2020 · 14/04/2020 16:07

Lots of groups of kids round here playing out together. Kids in and out of each other's houses too. Teenagers sitting at the park at night.
No lockdown here it seems Angry

tootiredtothink · 14/04/2020 16:09

Nope. It’s crazy the amount of people who don’t feel rules apply to them.

Snowflakes1122 · 14/04/2020 16:09

cherrybunx0 That is an illogical response to voting yabu, but there you go...

Obviously many neighbourhoods have idiots allowing this.

LolaLollypop · 14/04/2020 16:11

I saw about 30 teenagers having a game of football on the astroturfs near us yesterday. They'd climbed the fence and got in. I wondered where all the parents were wine monitoring their kids?
So some people are definitely allowing it.

FudgeBrownie2019 · 14/04/2020 16:12

No, and they understand why.

It's not negotiable or something I'm willing to bend on - my DC are 14 and 9 so are old enough to know the severity of the situation we're in and why it's vital they don't go out and about. It's not easy, of course, but it's necessary.

Darkbendis · 14/04/2020 16:12

No, they chat across the gardens (at least 10 -15 m distance between them) but that's pretty much it. And chatting and playing online, on Roblox, whatsapp etc I haven't seen children playing together on our street either, or in the local play park (which is shut anyway)

starrysimon · 14/04/2020 16:13

My neighbours are. There’s some green space round the back of our houses. It’s like being next to a school yard when we sit in the garden. Children from at least 3 different households playing together

kerkyra · 14/04/2020 16:14

I'm in a street of rows of terraces in a large village and haven't seen any children on the street since schools were closed.
Just the odd one cycling by or a family going for a walk.

MrsEricBana · 14/04/2020 16:16

No and nor is anyone I know.

cherrybunx0 · 14/04/2020 16:16

@Snowflakes1122 almost as illogical as asking, seriously, if I'm allowing my kids to play with the neighbours children during a national lockdown

LoveIsLovely · 14/04/2020 16:16

I'm in Korea, we're not having a lockdown here but advised to social distance and for kids not to meet. So why are half the neighbourhood out every day playing?

And someone on here the other day told me how complaint Koreans are!

Ha! Someone needs to tell the kids round here that!

Notimeforaname · 14/04/2020 16:17

Tonnes of people living around me standing in their gardens or on the street in groups. Grown fucking adults. So no wonder the kids do the same.

Next door neighbour's child is out running up to everybody he sees askin to play throwing tennis balls at them taking no notice to social distancing, parents watching out the window, laughing, saying nothing Hmm

SpicedCamomile · 14/04/2020 16:22

No, and I wouldn't of course but they don't really anyway - it's quite a busy road, and most of the kids go to different schools so don't know each other. I have seen children running around playing together and parents sitting on their doorsteps chatting when on bike rides through quieter estates.

emmathedilemma · 14/04/2020 16:27

My neighbour's kids from 3 different households are playing out together, and there was a 4th one here one day (I've no idea where she was from but she's not a sibling of the others!). It's making me so cross!! I get that it's hard and they live in a flat but the parents are still going out and about so it's just going to prolong this for everyone else.

gerrycinnamonssunqueen · 14/04/2020 16:29

My kids aren't allowed but there are 3 houses across the road who are out every day together. Have been reported but I'm guessing the police are stretched so far that they dont have time to check.
So unfair when everyone else is following the rules.