To ask how often you orgasm with your partner?

[lockdownlass]

Are the majority of men inherently selfish when it comes to sex and satisfying a partner?

I've just split up with my recent boyfriend for this - amongst lots of other reasons. All relationships I have had, with the exception of my first, have been selfish when it comes to sex. They will fall asleep straight after they've finished, are more interested in their own needs, they find it tiresome or cannot be bothered to finish me if it's been going on for any length of time. I've expressed this to multiple partners, discussed what I enjoy and how to get me off, I have tried not to be critical and instead make suggestions. Showed them myself what I enjoy in an attempt to be sexy but also demonstrate to them.

Are most men just lazy / selfish when it comes to satisfying their partners? Am I just meeting the wrong men?

Every time. Sex isn't over until both parties have orgasmed. Only been with two guys but both have given my pleasure equal importance to their own.

The first time I slept with someone, if they were like this, I would not sleep with them again!

If I don't climax during sex my DH will ensure that I do afterwards, and often also during foreplay.

I've found a lot of men don't want the guidance. They are so sure they know what they are doing - well that's the only reason I can think of. Exp went through a really weird phase of doing lots of foreplay/things that might make you cum just after I had. I'd stop him as it was far too sensitive for any of that but he kept doing it each time - no idea where he'd got the idea from.

@Milky77

I agree with you.

So many members here probably (and I say probably but IMO very likely) giving the OP a fabulous time behind their screen while reading all these juicy replies.

Everytime, he makes sure of it.

I hear you girl !!!!! Have you heard of the orgasm gap? Heterosexual women have less orgasms than anyone else. My ex genuinely believed every single woman he'd been with had orgasms from PIV every time, with no oral and no involvement of the clit whatsoever 🤔 Out of everyone I've slept with I've only met one man who was any good in bed. Super jealous of everyone who has managed to find a man who knows what they are doing 😂

@TippledPinkfbthats what works for you then that’s what works. It really is different strokes for different folks. I can sometimes have a second orgasm from penetration as I’m more sensitive after the first so I’m quite happy to keep going...why not if it might lead to another 😜

@midnightstar66 was he trying to see if he could get you to have a ‘multiple’ a lot of guys are fixated and being able to brag about that?

Dh usually waits for me. I know I'm very lucky!

Every time. I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t view my needs as important as their own.

Every time. DH won’t even let me touch his cock until I’ve had several orgasms through oral, rimming or some nifty finger work

Every man I’ve been has been exceptionally generous in bed! I think a lot of them get off on treating a woman well like that

In answer to your question, every time but never during PIV sex

I always orgasm. But then again my partner is another woman.

I doubt all men are like this though, OP. Find someone who cares about your pleasure, in sex and life in general. If they don't care about your orgasms, they probably don't care about many other things that are important to you.

Took us a while but we finish together most times...after years of either one of us not finishing at all, then one after the other. Honestly, took practise, learning rhthyms and cues of when the other is close.

@oldfarrmerr where do you find them? 😂

Every time during oral sex. Husband is extremely good at this.

9 times out of 10 with penetrative sex as some positions just don't work for me.

I don’t like to have an orgasm first as then I don’t want to continue. So that wouldn’t work for us. My DP is a sweetheart and is always concerned that I’m happy in the bedroom and out. If they’re selfish in the bedroom you can be sure they’re selfish out of it too.

@Daffodil55 and @Milky77: The sexual health and sexual satisfaction of women are important. For every person reading for inappropriate reasons, there are more who will benefit from constructive comment.

I'm surprised at the men not wanting to have guidance! Most men I've slept with (and certainly DH) have been very interested in what turns me on. Even after 20 years together DH and I try new things to see what might get each other going. If a man wasn't interested in my pleasure I'd think he was pretty selfish tbh and wouldn't want a relationship with him.

My husband always makes me orgasm first :)

I think once men are satisfied that’s it for them so you have to come first
I disagree, I think both men and women can feel this way.
When I’ve orgasmed, that’s it, I don’t want to do anything other than kiss and cuddle.
When DH has orgasmed, he could go on and on and on with foreplay.
I always finish first as an unspoken rule because we both know that I won’t be interested after

So many members here probably (and I say probably but IMO very likely) giving the OP a fabulous time behind their screen while reading all these juicy replies

Does it really matter? We’re all adults here. No need to be prudish or assume that the OP has other intentions just because they’ve dared to post about sex

I’ve never had a relationship with a man like that. Most of them enjoyed giving and would’ve been disappointed not to achieve that. It may be reflective of the type of men they are.

If OP wants to have a wank, s/he could just look in the "Sex" section, or indeed Google some porn...