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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not sure u lot are clever enuff to answer this...

192 replies

AlphaMummyVoiceOfReason · 13/09/2007 15:00

My white, Crocs and Boden wearing, home educated daughter (who was delivered by elective CS so as to avoid pushing and include tummy tuck) was brought up on Formula milk laced with fruit shoots and Greggs' sausage rolls, after starting on puree at 14 weeks, which did her no harm. She certainly filled her disposable nappies!

She is so Gifted and Talented that my highly presentable size 8 nanny has to park her 4x4 in the disabled bay, and when she walks my dog next to the children's play area of the local and inferior state school (I'm no racist but it is full of immigrants), she is so busy listening to dd's insightful and well-informed explanation of exactly what happened to Madeleine McCann that she has no time to scoop the poop, thus necessitating the use of organic hemp dog nappies.

We feel that a light smack with the Daily Mail is the best (and kindest) way to limit the questions, or , if she has a modelling assignment coming up, it's easier to send her straight to bed - of course she cries, but will settle herself after a few hours. She can always watch the TV in her bedroom or play computer games if she can't sleep.

My question is: As the nanny at our country house is about to be deported back to Ruritania, should I send DD to boarding school now, or wait until she is seven? And should I allow her to walk there by herself?

Any advice - from longterm MN regulars only - welcomed. No arguments on my thread, you can leave if you don't like it. My views may be controversial but I'm still right.

OP posts:
Peachy · 13/09/2007 15:59

(but steak bakes are yummier >

Doodledootoo · 13/09/2007 16:00

Message withdrawn

OrmIrian · 13/09/2007 16:02

Weeellll peachy! I'm not sure the 'traditional' cornish pasties don't beat them all into a cocked hat...

lucyellensmum · 13/09/2007 16:03

re the boarding school: Its a must, how else is she going to meet an eligable bachelor? They prepare them for that sort of thing you know, and i think they organise the intros too. I mean, if you don't send her away, you risk her shacking up with a plumber, or worse [sucks air through teeth emoticon]

Meeely2 · 13/09/2007 16:03

meeeely steps in weilding a freshly baked baguette "stand down girls" OP specifically said no arguments

lucyellensmum · 13/09/2007 16:05

Orm, should they be served with or without oven chips and beans, and does it always have to be a fruit shoot, or can i go for full sugar ribena?

Peachy · 13/09/2007 16:05

In see your corned beef pasties and I raise you baked nean and sausage bakes..... WITH a dairy free bun!

A-HA!

Hurlyburly · 13/09/2007 16:06

A steak and guinness cornish pasty with chips and gravy.

MrsBadger · 13/09/2007 16:07

can I be a lone voice cring in the wilderness here and suggest not sending her away to school till she is 7?
This will give you valuable Smug Points and enable you to induce guilt in, and hence lord it over, the obviously uncaring and inferior mothers who sent them at 4.
Make sure they all know that you gave up work to stay at home with her (lie if neccessary).

And for heaven's sake choose somewhere with a nice uniform - those tweed jackets they've brought in at Stowe are awful...

Emzy5 · 13/09/2007 16:07

OMG... lol

lucyellensmum · 13/09/2007 16:07

stop it, you are making me hungry

Doodledootoo · 13/09/2007 16:08

Message withdrawn

OrmIrian · 13/09/2007 16:08

What's 'baked nean' peachy? Thinking that if you are starting to introduce rare and outlandish ingredients I will have to give way >

lem - they are best eaten out of the paper bag whilst walking down the High Street - but please ensure your child pops into somewhere expensive so he/she can run greasy hands all over the clothes/upholstery/window. Drink is totally irrelevant TBH.

lucyellensmum · 13/09/2007 16:09

Oh and make sure the school has an equestrian facility, you don't want the poor little dear to have to leave the sodding animal with you.

Peachy · 13/09/2007 16:11

Tis a welsh thing, like cockles and seaweed or summat But existence of ingredient or not, I WIN and that's all that matters

Bouncingturtle · 13/09/2007 16:13

I really want a Gregg's sausage roll now....

OrmIrian · 13/09/2007 16:16

Are you sure you wouldn't rather have 'a baked nean and sausage bake' bouncingturtle?

lucyellensmum · 13/09/2007 16:16

i think we have lost sight of the reason behind this thread, please remember the OPs plight here.

niceglasses · 13/09/2007 16:19

4 for £1 where I live, like.
Very hard to resist, esp when it fits perfectly - 1 for each of bairns and 1 for me.

Lush.

OrmIrian · 13/09/2007 16:21

Ooh no niceglasses. I think that's the small ones.....

niceglasses · 13/09/2007 16:23

Is it? Maybe. Well 1.75 for 4 biggies is good then innit?

To be honest my fav is the cheese pasty.

I once said all I wanted for Christmas was a Greggs Cheese pasty and cometh the day, cometh the man, there it was under the tree, all wrapped up.

TigerFeet · 13/09/2007 16:28

Are you lot bumping this thread to 1000 in order to get it removed?

3andnomore · 13/09/2007 16:32

lololol so funny alpha
[pondering who alpha normally is emoticon]

Hurlyburly · 13/09/2007 16:33

YOU FARKING FOOD CLIQUE

Threadworm · 13/09/2007 16:37

Just spotted on Sky News:

"A highly reliable internet forum that Sky reporters use instead of research has today revealed that an anorexic childcare profesional risks being deported to Ruritania.

"We are devastated," said her employers. "Now we will have to smack our own child."