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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that 10 easter eggs per child from MIL is atrocious

606 replies

garlicbread82 · 12/04/2020 09:27

MIL has just dropped off 10 easter eggs each to my 3 DCs (we maintained social distancing, she left them at the end of the path).

Now dont get me wrong, I am greatful, but 10 each? Really? I think this is not only overzealous, it also undermines me. I have told her in previous years that one egg each is more than enough, and maybe a small gift, however she continues to undermine me in front of my DCs.

I have allowed my DCs to choose one egg each from the pile to go with the eggs they have already received, and the rest will be dropped off at the local food bank next week. DH thinks I am being unreasonable, and has gone upstairs in a huff Hmm Happy Easter hey?

AIBU?

OP posts:
TimeAintNothing · 12/04/2020 12:06

Whereas the OP is behaving like a paragon of maturity and calm.

Fruitsaladjelly · 12/04/2020 12:06

Having said that, I’m not sure I’d give them away, just have a box per child tucked somewhere high up and last them out over the summer, they don’t take up much space once the packaging is removed. Just don’t buy them sweets for the foreseeable future. Your DH should really understand that his DM ‘s attention seeking ott giving isn’t fair on you or other family members.

Original poster
garlicbread82 · 12/04/2020 12:06

@TimeAintNothing I don't pre-approve which BRAND of shoes she buys, my DCs love to open their Lelli Kellies and the type, especially DC2.

OP posts:
Iggi999 · 12/04/2020 12:08

If/when you are divorced, just think what your dc will be eating on their contact weekends. Maybe you should rein it in a bit and let your dh be a parent too?

ILoveYou3000 · 12/04/2020 12:09

That begs the question- why does the H get to overrule the OP?
that goes both ways, not just one

He doesn't, as I've already stated a conversation needs to be had between both parents and a compromise reached.

Original poster
garlicbread82 · 12/04/2020 12:09

@ILoveYou3000 DH knows very well how his mother behaves, he was probably half-expecting this. I am not "overulling" him if he unilaterally decides to sulk upstairs on his own like a petulant manchild, leaving me to sweep up the mess caused by MIL.

OP posts:
1forsorrow · 12/04/2020 12:10

If/when you are divorced, just think what your dc will be eating on their contact weekends. Maybe you should rein it in a bit and let your dh be a parent too? Maybe it will be the OP who gets the contact weekends.

squeekums · 12/04/2020 12:10

Why are so many of you pretending you would be fine with this

Cos I am ok with it. Dd egg hunt for her only had 45 eggs alone. Going by this thread if I posted a pic of all we bought, I'd get reported for child abuse.
We haven't seen in-laws yet, we know they will have a stash for dd too.

I also don't have an issue with a parent downing 2 big Macs in front of a kid either or half a pizza.

Does the op count how many fries her dh has too? How many salt granules on said fries?

Quicklittlenamechange · 12/04/2020 12:11

YANBU these things are normally part of a longer term pattern of problematic behaviour rather than an indivudual, isolated event.
This!
Honestly its absolutely ridiculous behaviour by the MIL, particularly given the times we are in-30 eggs, she should be ashamed .
I think OP that people are taking out their own frustrations on here and sadly you are in the firing line.

OhCaptain · 12/04/2020 12:12

That begs the question- why does the H get to overrule the OP?
that goes both ways, not just one

He doesn’t. Nobody said he did.

But now Easter for the kids is ruined because OP chose to get all po-faced and controlling instead of quietly putting most of them away until they BOTH decided what was best.

Bibijayne · 12/04/2020 12:12

That is overkill!

Iggi999 · 12/04/2020 12:12

Why not try this Op - give them the eggs. So they see what they've got. Then ration them to one a week. During lockdown they will be glad of something to look forward to.
Then you have no "mess" to clear up and no unhappy husband. Why create drama for yourself, unless you enjoy the power struggle.

OlaEliza · 12/04/2020 12:13

and he's their father?

But he's obviously not got any sense if he thinks 10 eggs from one person, on top of all their other eggs, is acceptable 🤷

cologne4711 · 12/04/2020 12:13

I don't really see the issue with lots of eggs. You don't have to eat them all in one go, one a week isn't so bad or even two a week. Or you do eat them all in one go and once they've gone they've gone.

Bookoffacts · 12/04/2020 12:13

Do you give away their Christmas presents too.
You are atrocious and if you were my mother I would never forget this. See major issues when they are adults and remember this.
I think your husband should divorce you too over just this issue.

1forsorrow · 12/04/2020 12:14

Firstly- OP is an adult, not a child. Adults are meant to model behaviour for kids, not just allow them whatever they want. By that rationale, you'd raise a bunch of spoilt brats who couldn't handle life saying no to them. So what is she modelling? That you can steal another persons belongings and give them away?

Secondly- the OP has every RIGHT to bring her kids up in the way she sees fit. Her MIL brought her son up in the manner she wanted to and now its the OP's turn. If OP doesnt want them having that many, its her choice to say no. The children have two parents, she has no automatic right to make all the decisions.

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 12/04/2020 12:15

So what is she modelling? That you can steal another persons belongings and give them away

Steal? lmao! this thread is gold Grin

dialmformmmm · 12/04/2020 12:15

It's just such an overwhelming thing to do, especially when you've asked her not to.

30 large Easter eggs from one person? Madness.

1forsorrow · 12/04/2020 12:15

But he's obviously not got any sense if he thinks 10 eggs from one person, on top of all their other eggs, is acceptable So you get to decide how many eggs a child can have and judge other parents. Is that a paid position or do you do it on a voluntary basis?

Aragog · 12/04/2020 12:16

Why not let the children keep them - as that is what your DH wants to do anyway and he should get at least as much choice over it as you - but then only let them have one a week or fortnight instead. They'll last for ages.

I don't see how what you want over rules dh's choice regardless.

Soubriquet · 12/04/2020 12:16

We got a few eggs each for the dc as it’s buy one get one free

I think shops are struggling to sell them

They have 15 small eggs each (from egg hunting) and then 5 more large eggs each.

Sounds like a lot but this will be all the chocolate we will need to buy them for a year!! So lasts a nice long time

Nolie100 · 12/04/2020 12:17

I can't see the problem here.

Two eggs each for the kids. Sixteen for me (to me spread out over two to three days obvs).

Iggi999 · 12/04/2020 12:17

I wonder how many eggs they are allowed under the OP's rules? I suspect they don't have that many other ones! (And the ones with mugs really aren't that big, if they fit into a mug, it's mostly packaging anyway.)

DartmoorChef · 12/04/2020 12:18

They received more than enough "fun" gifts from Santa. I am not controlling, but I am the mother here, and MIL isn't. She has had her time, and her spiteful behaviour is mirrored in DH's sulk this morning

You obviously don't like her at all. No wonder your husband is staying out of your way. You sound controlling, jealous and a complete killjoy.

diddl · 12/04/2020 12:18

Plastic tat at Christmas, huge, grotesque eggs at Easter!Grin

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