To think that 10 easter eggs per child from MIL is atrocious

[garlicbread82]

MIL has just dropped off 10 easter eggs each to my 3 DCs (we maintained social distancing, she left them at the end of the path).

Now dont get me wrong, I am greatful, but 10 each? Really? I think this is not only overzealous, it also undermines me. I have told her in previous years that one egg each is more than enough, and maybe a small gift, however she continues to undermine me in front of my DCs.

I have allowed my DCs to choose one egg each from the pile to go with the eggs they have already received, and the rest will be dropped off at the local food bank next week. DH thinks I am being unreasonable, and has gone upstairs in a huff Happy Easter hey?

AIBU?

Of course it's over the top, but you only allowing them one, and not even discussing it with your DH is also over the top. As for the pre-approved shoes and a book for Christmas...words fail me. I don't like tat, but Jeeeze, Christmas is for wants, not needs. And you're clearly determined that MIL shouldn't have any pleasure in choosing and giving.

I don't see your problem with my pre-approved gift of shoes and a book

Why do you feel that you should pre-approve gifts?

They received more than enough "fun" gifts from Santa.

Maybe Santa should have brought the shoes then, so that granny could buy them something fun.

I am not controlling

Yes, you are.

I don’t know why you don’t just say you don’t like your MIL and her buying all those eggs has pissed you right off. I’d imagine everything and anything she does has the same effect.

We’ve all been there with in laws at some point. Do you need to make it a massive issue? It’s the kids and DH that get the earful, not the intended recipient.

Anyhoo, I’ll say it again, it’s chocolate day Get one down you 😉

I think you are being a bit U. She's trying to be nice. Those eggs with the mugs are ridiculously thin chocolate and would even melt down to a little Cadbury's single bar. You don't have to just eat them either. Most have long expiry dates and you can cook with them and make rice Krispy cakes, cornflake cakes etc

x-posted with you, OP, but yep, always one!

You might find your DH gets sick to death of all this hassle and point scoring and starts to wonder what life would be like with a woman who is more warm hearted and easy going

Or looks for a new partner that doesn’t go against everything his mum does and actually likes her.

The children have two parents, both equals. If he’s happy with the eggs the OP doesn’t get to over ride him with no agreed discussion. He gets an equal say too.

There was still stacks of eggs in the supermarket late last night. So I doubt mils stockpiling has had an adverse effect on others. Take them to the food bank if you want, although they're not really yours to give. I'd be pissed off if my husband took it upon himself to get rid of the eggs my mother had bought for our children, but you do you.

Those eggs with MUGS... what is OP supposed to do with all those blessed mugs afterwards?

I think you’re BU. My kids used to get loads of eggs and often still had one or two left by Christmas - it was a running joke in the house about finishing the Easter chocolate before Santa came! My point is, they didn’t binge eat them, they have no eating issues as they grow up and the eggs are relatively cheap - they’re a token gift from aunts, uncles etc. You say you allow her to buy an egg and a gift - my SIL once tried this - don’t buy DN an egg, just buy her an outfit. BIG difference in price. Just chill and use the eggs up over time - your kids will remember how DM took their eggs away!

As for pre approved Christmas gifts, unless they are coveted shoes by a child who wants a parenting necessity as their Christmas present. I can see why she gifts the way she does.

Everyone expressing horror that the op has only let the DC keep one egg, it's one egg from mil. No I think alot of us agree 10 eggs is ridiculous but taking something that belongs to the child and giving it away isn't OK. My MIL used to do this with my husband when he was a child, the result is he is a hoarder, took him years to acknowledge he was a hoarder and what the cause was. In many ways it has blighted his life, it has certainly blighted mine. Either put the eggs away to be eaten over a period of time or talk to the children about what to do with them.

Surely one egg is un oeuf..?

@I**@IceCreamAndCandyFloss What about his mother going against every thy I if his wife has said?!

Argh stupid MN app not letting me see what I'm typing. Should say @IceCreamAndCandyFloss What about his mother going against everything his wife has said?!

@OlaEliza and he’s their father?

@saraclara has it spot on.

My 6 grandkids get one egg each..and a tenner each. They are 22 Down to 10 years old.

I agree that 30 eggs is a bit excessive!so I can understand your frustration when she has form for undermining you. However having said that do you think it's possible in this instance that it isn't an attempt to undermine you and simply a grandmother missing her dgc and spoiling them in the only way she can at the mo(I agree she went a little over board with the choc) it's strange and difficult times were living in at the mo so I wouldn't take it personally. Tho you have every right to be annoyed if it was me I would let them keep the eggs they would have seen them and think it would be a bit mean to give them away unless of course thats what they wanted to do. I hope you and your husband work things out and you all have a lovely easter Sunday together. Happy Easter x

No OP, a potential affair won't be because of an Easter egg-gate incident. It will be because of a 1000 similar petty battles due to your over controlling, judgemental behaviour which tarnishes your life together. It's death by a thousand tiny cuts. I have seen it happen when the relationship dynamic is like you and your DHs.

Lyingwitchinthewardrobe trust me I would be over the moon if MIL delivered thirty Easter eggs, then I could help myself to quite a few

@Fudgewhizz and what about if the MiL checked with OP's DH and he didn't tell her not to buy the kids 10 eggs each? Why does OP get to overrule her husband?

Yes 10 eggs each is excessive but OP clearly hates her MiL. She should have had a discussion with her husband and reached a compromise. She doesn't get to make the decisions for their children without taking his feelings into account.

10 large eggs per child is ridiculous. Its not about "letting them enjoy it"-its sending a message of pure greed and over consumerism FGS.

Its no wonder our obesity levels are matching those in the US. Sugary treats are FINE in moderation- 10 large chocolate eggs in one go is not moderation, its gross. I'd give them one each and donate the rest to kids in hospital or in poverty. That would be a lovely thing to do (obv you'll have to check re: social distancing rules etc).

Not sure if this would lead to an affair, on the other hand they are forecasting a huge increase in divorce rates once this is over.

@peaceanddove Except for the interference caused by MIL...we have a loving, caring relationship... but when it comes to MIL, he just refuses to listen

No I think alot of us agree 10 eggs is ridiculous but taking something that belongs to the child and giving it away isn't OK.

Why? They don’t need 10 Easter Eggs plus the extra stuff included. She’s not taking them all away, she’s letting them keep a few. I’d agree if she wasn’t letting them keep any of them and just gave them to charity, but she’s not. They are still getting gifts from MIL.

but when it comes to MIL, he just refuses to listen

So do you!

Honestly, all this angst because she’s a bit OTT with her gifts. It’s not worth it.