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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Need advice for my son

136 replies

Hoarder123 · 08/04/2020 11:03

My son who normally lives with us has moved out to stay with a friend as my husband is a “shielded” person. He was terrified that he would catch Coronavirus and pass it on to his dad, knowing this would probably be fatal. Unfortunately his friend started showing symptoms 2 days after he moved in, therefore he has had to isolate for 14 days, which are now up.
He normally works shifts in a factory that is open 24 hours a day 5 days a week.

Due to the Coronavirus the person who gives him a list is refusing to take him to work, which is fair enough as he obviously wants to minimise his risk. When he can’t get a lift by this person he normally gets the bus or his dad takes him back and forward.

The issue now is the buses that, time wise, would normally be able to take him back and forward are cancelled. His shifts are 10pm-6am, 6am-2pm and 2pm-10pm.There are no buses he could get to work around these shifts as earliest either way is 9am and latest 6pm. His dad is his backup if he can’t get the bus or a lift. Obviously with his dad at such significant risk, him taking him is not possible.

The response from the company he works for is that it is his responsibility to get to work, end of story! They have put him as AWOL and told him he won’t get paid anything. He will also probably lose his job over this.

Is he being unreasonable in not being at work, because he can’t get, unless he walks the 5 miles there and back? Any advice gratefully appreciated.

OP posts:

TonytheDog · 08/04/2020 12:08

How about an electric skateboard? He'd cover 5 miles quite quickly and it's easy to carry if he has to walk, cross. Busy road etc.

Original poster

Hoarder123 · 08/04/2020 12:08

@BigChocFrenzy He took the job because the bus service was fine for him getting to and from, apart from one shift start, which wasn’t a problem as if his dad couldn’t take him, one of his sisters would, but that’s not allowed now. The lifts were just the icing on the cake.

he'll just have to take the bus and wait even 3 hours at work until his shift starts
- that's shit, but better than losing his job atm
He would do that if he could, not happily, but he would. His employers however won’t allow anyone, other than those working at the time, in the building apart from the 20 minutes before and after the shift times.

OP posts:

DareToTiger · 08/04/2020 12:12

What about an e-bike then? Like grannies have?

Original poster

Hoarder123 · 08/04/2020 12:12

@TonytheDog would something like that actually work? I have thought about him using my mobility scooter, even though it would take about an hour and a half each way, but didn’t think that the charge would last both ways.

OP posts:

OlaEliza · 08/04/2020 12:13

What do you want to happen op? You've shot down every suggestion so far.

It seems as though a moped is his best bet if he can't walk or cycle. People without licenses can drive certain ones. He'll have to get one of those.

Pinkdelight3 · 08/04/2020 12:14

What was the problem with walking? A five mile walk is only 90mins. He can listen to podcasts or music. He's not stranded.

Lalala205 · 08/04/2020 12:14

So really just one shift he'll have to walk both ways. The other 2 shifts walk in/or home, and bus in/home. Definately not ideal but better than walking in/out all shifts.

Marieo · 08/04/2020 12:18

I wonder how many people saying walk would actually walk 10 miles a day, plus a whole shift presumably on their feet? Some nasty replies here, if he can normally get there by public transport and it's only the one shift a week, he doesn't rely on others all of the time. It seems unreasonable that his work won't work around the bus times at a time like this, as long as he isn't getting paid for more hours than he is actually doing I don't see why others would be annoyed. They aren't being wildly unreasonable to say it's not their responsibility, but neither is he to not want to bloody walk or cycle it. His choices are probably fairly limited though, if they won't flex realistically not sure what can be done.

screwcovid19 · 08/04/2020 12:18

It really is his responsibility to get to work.

Are you really sure he can't manage the cycle? It would take 15 minutes. I'd be really surprised if he couldn't manage that even after an ACL repair.

I broke my ankle & leg in 4 places requiring 2 lots of surgery (waiting for my 3rd) have bone spur and arthritis. I could still easily manage a 5 mile cycle and could about 6 months after the original injury.

I know someone else who had an ACL repair and was back at the gym and playing football etc within months.

HippoPudgy · 08/04/2020 12:18

How old is he and when was his ACL repair?

hesgotit · 08/04/2020 12:19

Cycle 2/3 miles, walk the rest and do the reverse on the way home?

Marieo · 08/04/2020 12:19

he'll just have to take the bus and wait even 3 hours at work until his shift starts

Would anyone actually do this? Or be happy for their son or daughter to? I doubt it.

screwcovid19 · 08/04/2020 12:20

Typo 45 mins*

JKScot4 · 08/04/2020 12:21

I’m loving the assumptions that he has the finances to buy an electric bike, moped, pay taxis, he works in a factory so unlikely a high earner.
Tbf the so called friend is being daft, he won’t give him a lift but works with him 🙄
I think a bike might be his only option and cheapest.

JudyCoolibar · 08/04/2020 12:21

Cycle, and walk up the hills.

Or invest in an electric bike.

JudyCoolibar · 08/04/2020 12:22

I’m loving the assumptions that he has the finances to buy an electric bike, moped, pay taxis, he works in a factory so unlikely a high earner

Maybe OP could help him? Or he could look into hiring?

Time4change2018 · 08/04/2020 12:22

How far can he cycle... Maybe cycle part way, walk the rest ?
No one else in work able to offer partial journey even?
What about his sister you mentioned or other family members in the short term or for occasional shifts ?
Walking 5 miles isn't ideal but my brother is a posts and walking 10/15 miles a day at work, my cousin works for Amazon and clocked 20 miles the other day... needs must and all that

StampMc · 08/04/2020 12:23

He can use the bus for the 2pm starts and finishes. A lightweight scooter will quicken him up on the other legs and he will be able to carry it on the bus. 5 miles is not an unreasonable distance to walk/cycle/scoot. I’m struggling to believe that 2 taxi companies are running taxis but not at any of those, frankly quite normal, times.

Janaih · 08/04/2020 12:24

I would do a mix of walking and taxis. Electric scooter if funds allow.

hesgotit · 08/04/2020 12:26

Tbf the so called friend is being daft, he won’t give him a lift but works with him 🙄

They may work two meters apart but won't be two meters apart in a car, so not daft at all!

Lalala205 · 08/04/2020 12:27

How many people do they have on the factory floor? He could ask around offering decent petrol money if anyone else lives on route who might be prepared to give a lift. Even if he set off walking part way early to meet up with them.

Janus · 08/04/2020 12:30

I’ve just looked on Amazon, an electric scooter does 14mph do would do it in 20 mins, cost £200. That’s definitely an option? Folds up to nothing too for storage.

Original poster

Hoarder123 · 08/04/2020 12:30

@CalleighDoodle I can do without your goady posts, so please don’t respond.

@OlaEliza and @DareToTiger thank you for your suggestions, we never thought of something like that. This is what I was hoping for when I posted. I have had a look and this would work (though I suspect he would rather have the electric skateboard that TonytheDog suggested).

To everyone who has given good suggestions, thank you. He isn’t work shy as some have suggested, he just wants a solution to his problem. The ebike/scooter might be an intermediate solution, till he can learn to drive, though he will have to start saving again if he buys one of these.

OP posts:

StampMc · 08/04/2020 12:34

he'll just have to take the bus and wait even 3 hours at work until his shift starts

Would anyone actually do this? Or be happy for their son or daughter to? I doubt it.

I used to have a job that finished at 4am and had to hang around until 6.30am for my bus. It was horrible, but the job gave me more pay and more hours than waitressing/bar work and meant I could study during the day which was difficult with retail etc. I changed jobs a lot when I was young for better hours, better pay, greater flexibility, greater prospects etc as I’m sure lots of people do. Only the OPs ds knows whether this job is worth inconveniencing himself for or not. It might be a well paid job with prospects that he enjoys. Or it might be badly paid and horrible and he’s better off applying somewhere within walking distance for the same money.

Al1Langdownthecleghole · 08/04/2020 12:34

How rural is rural? if you have a factory within 5 miles, Uber probably is an option.

I would go with the PP's suggestion
Ask to work 2-10
Go to work on the bus, early if necessary to fit in with times
Get an Uber home.

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