to think that this is really sad for the young children?

[PrettyLittleLiar20]

I’ve got a young child who is so so bored at home. Constantly asks if we can go to the playground. I say no the playground is closed. Can we go to the beach mummy? No because we’re not allowed. Mummy can we go to McDonald’s? No because it’s closed. I’m just so so sad for my DD and im constantly feeling bad because she doesn’t understand any of this.

Can we go to the park?
I’ve got a better idea - let’s have a teddy bears picnic and build a tent indoors!
Clearly your 4 yo isn't very persistent. I'd be met with "but Mama I want to go on the slide / but I want to go with Nanny / we did that already" which is fine, it isn't something that can't be managed, but not every 4/5 yo is so unformed in their own opinions and ideas and will

Haha - he was (still is) very persistent but I had a lot more energy when he was 4. My mum never played with me so I made up for not when he was little.

Acceptance is everything lifeisgenerally good you're right, and a sense of what we can control and what we can't. None of this is ideal but we have to put our best feet forward and continue. It's changing your mindset to things you can do that you usually wouldn't rather than concentrating on what you can't. All of these things children pick up on. And many will be sad and that's OK too.

SleepingStandingUp, he's not going to be palmed off! It's probably worth just agreeing that it would be really nice and thinking about what he'd like to go on.. maybe he'd like to do a drawing of the park, make one for any toys he has or making a slide off the couch, say but having the 'Yes it is hard' time important too. I think a lot of posters here see it may well be hard for children while at the same time encouraging the op herself not to be too sad for her DC, if you see the distinction, as she as an adult has the perspective that they dont.

Ive a three yeAr who understands why we cant go out. (There are ill people out there). She misses her friends but has extra mummy daddy time. She seems vvvvvvvv happy at the moment. Weve the smallest garden yiu can image no grass but hay we coping. If anyone i feel sorry its people in flats with no gardens and those who have cv and the amazing key workers who have chosen to give their children to family while this is going on. They so brave. Children will be ok and tbh they going to love being back at school and appreciate every day things after this.

It's obviously sad for everyone, but as an adult I understand why we can't go out. A small child doesn't.

I have the opposite problem really. DS has always been a bit of a school refuser and we've had terrible problems getting him to school. He's too happy to not be going and I'm dreading the problems we're going to have getting him to go back again and the set backs to his independence and social skills.

It's definitely hard on kids, not just little ones, but also kids with no outside space, kids with no siblings to keep them company and kids who have a chaotic home life at the best of times. We as adults are emotionally able to process it more, but just try to explain to your child that it won't be forever. It must be hard for you parents with little ones who have to be constantly entertained. I have a 10 year old and spend the day trying to prise her phone out of her hands, so we can spend some family time together!!

@Heygirlheyboy

Agree. No way would my 3 year old be fobbed off that easily. I find empathising with him and finding a way to let out his frustrations much better. We have spent some time hitting imaginary germs in the garden with sticks, for example.

I do find the lack of sympathy for kids here really weird generally. I don't particularly see why posters fall over themselves to sympathise with the elderly but little kids are expected just to get over it. They have feelings too and they don't all love being at home all the time.

I honestly wonder why some posters have a hard time saying it is sad that children cannot go to the playground, school, football club, ballet class, play with friends, see granny and grandpa....

How is it not sad? Not the saddest thing in the world, not the saddest thing about coronavirus, not the worst thing that will happen to them, not that it's not the right thing to do.
I'm not saying it's any of those. But it is still sad. It just is!
And when my DS is frustrated as he's sporty sociable 12 year old, or my DD misses her friends and teacher I do say it is necessary and we're all doing our bit. But i also recognise their feelings, tell them (not with a wobbly lip and a tear in my eye) that I understand because I miss things too. I don't dismiss their feelings, they are valid. But I don't let them wallow, we look for things to be positive about, and look forward to the end.

But, my point is still that it IS sad, and that is fine.

Well I’m going to sound like a tv character here... but my mum lived in London during the Blitz and had to contend with bombings, sleeping in the underground, seeing POWs returning and having her school bombed. That was trauma. Kids have access to a lot more entertainment and communications nowadays - I know parents are busy/working...

My mum reminded me the other day that when she was a toddler at home with her mum & baby sister, they went nowhere. Perhaps an odd walk to a park, but mum reminded me that all the household jobs took far longer, the washing & cleaning, cooking etc, mums didn't have time (or money) for baby groups or hanging round in cafes. She also remembered as an older child that it wasn't common for other parents with kids to come over either. Children were more used to occupying themselves. I've noticed in the 3 weeks we have been off, DS (3) is already getting better at amusing himself. It's no bad thing. He's perfectly happy at home with me if I'm honest, isn't really missing preschool although he enjoys it when he's there.

Yes it’s sad that no one has the life they wanted just now but if parents are convinced their DC will be harmed by their lack of getting what they are used to, I think that’s an exaggeration. Many DC don’t see extended family all the time. It’s not great for anyone that drastic changed have been imposed, but you have to deal with it and there probably won’t be any serious issues arising from this. So sad yes, saying that DC will be hugely affected is down to how you manage them. If they are persistent then maybe they will mature a bit and accept that they don’t always get what they want. That will be hard but what choice is there?

NoIDomtWatchLoveIsland: I have been trying to say the same. We were not damaged. No play group. No baby group. Nothing was provided before school started. No cafe where mums met up. No money either! For a limited period, lack of normal life won’t be a big issue. I’m far more concerned about neglected children from chaotic families. They suffer all the time and they will end up with even bigger issues than they had before.

It is what you make it. Yes it is sad... I'm particularly sad for my 11 year old DS who potentially won't ever return to his Primary School like so many others. He is an awkward age where in many ways he is mature, understands but even so he sees and hears things on TV or from friends and is scared his family will get ill or die... However, we are using the time to enjoy as a family however we can.. Each day he does an hours outdoor activity with myself or DH. We are lucky and have some coastal walks on our doorstep and live near some small villages with some country walks without the need to drive so we have alternated those, threw stones into the sea, made homework as fun as possible, he has learned a few helpful skills such as washing pots, making his bed, using the washing machine... He has read a few books, made a few pictures and stayed in contact with friends via what's app etc. Oh and Joe Wicks has been my saviour as DS wants to get fit and has been on a few jogs for new season football. Oddly he has spent less time on his PS4 then normal.

DS Age 1... Well he is loving having us all home and is easily entertained with books, toy figures, a walk out each day and playing with his ride on/push along toys. I'm sure at this age whether or not babies attend social classes isn't going to harm them in any way. They don't know what's going on and enjoy whatever fun you make for them.

My friend has a DD aged 4 who has just had her birthday party cancelled etc but friend arranged a picnic tea for herself DD and DH, bought a cake, built a den etc and her DD instead of presents received Moonpig cards (arranged a few days prior) with photos of her and each friend on and most of us have promised her a play date after this is all over... It is a hard age when they are too young to really understand

I at times find it all less fun as I am WFH also and conference calls with DS attached to a leg arnt that fun...

If I am being selfish I feel sorry for myself in a house without a garden as both DS would benefit from this but hey ho people are in worse situations and both are safe and well fingers crossed it stays that way.

i think it's amazing for small children in some ways, all the extra parent time and focus. teenagers on the other hand i really feel for

I don't think anyone is saying that their kids will be harmed by this, more that their kids are unhappy about this. But lots of posters saying that kids have no right to their feelings as 20 years ago they would have been sat at home all day or it's not as bad as the blitz.

No one is telling the elderly to get over it because it could be worse, get some perspective, it's not the blitz.

No one is saying that children have no rights to their feelings - I have a 15 year old who is pretty sad he isn’t going to sit his GCSEs. People are pointing out that it’s up to the parents to make the best of a bad deal - and that the kids won’t be emotionally scarred by it. A lot of the elderly will be stuck home alone and not in brilliant health, and not all are tech savvy.

Look at the kids in refugee camps. Or in India. Most kids in the UK, unless very poor or living with violence or something awful, are much luckier. Many, especially those with parents on mumsnet worrying about them, have tv and internet, and lots of games and toys. They will be unharmed by extra time with their parents.
Yes. Why don't you watch CH 4 news and look at the children in India cramped together with no soap to wash, no food. Many will die of hunger. OP get a grip.

If that's what you think is 'sad' then I echo previous posters in thinking about...
Kids in Indian slums
Kids locked in abusive households
Kids who are going hungry right now
Kids who die from CV

I'm not a person who usually says 'get over it other people have it worse' but I think this situation really warrants it. If your life changes are not going to the park and McDonalds you are EXTREMELY lucky.

My mother was 2 in 1939 and WW2 started. She was 8 when it finished, and her father was fighting abroad the whole time.

When he came home (and many fathers didn't) he was pretty traumatised from what I gather, and she found it very difficult to adjust to having this stranger in the house.

Rationing continued all the way through her teens.

They had no tv, no internet nor phone - no way of contacting distant family except to write letters.

Lockdown has lasted a fortnight so far. It's really not that tragic.

iA lot of the elderly will be stuck home alone and not in brilliant health, and not all are tech savvy

But they're not in a refugee camp, starving or in the blitz. Apparently those are the only things that anyone is allowed to have feelings about.

I do hope nobody on this thread who has taken part in ridiculous whataboutery ever says “gosh I’m tired today”. Or feels fed up. Or has a bad day at work.

I feel sad for poor children in general who are stuck in poky flats and have neglectful or abusive parents.
I think that a lot of children will actually benefit from this period. Some parents actively choose this lifestyle. They're called homeschoolers. Parents up and down the country are learning valuable skills in how to educate their own children.

derxa I have quite a few friends who home school and they do a fab job. However they spend time with other home schooling families, go to museums, galleries, do extra curricular activities like gymnastics, football, horse riding... completely different to the current situation we’re in.

However they spend time with other home schooling families, go to museums, galleries, do extra curricular activities like gymnastics, football, horse riding... completely different to the current situation we’re in. Yes I appreciate that.
I will add a Monty Python story of my own. I'm old and my brother and I didn't play with or see another child till we were 5 and went to school. We were gregarious and happy at school.