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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that this is really sad for the young children?

429 replies

PrettyLittleLiar20 · 06/04/2020 18:30

I’ve got a young child who is so so bored at home. Constantly asks if we can go to the playground. I say no the playground is closed. Can we go to the beach mummy? No because we’re not allowed. Mummy can we go to McDonald’s? No because it’s closed. I’m just so so sad for my DD and im constantly feeling bad because she doesn’t understand any of this. Sad

OP posts:
Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:05

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HoffiCoffi13 · 07/04/2020 14:06

Well when my DC had chicken pox they were still able to see my parents, which is what they’re missing most at the moment.

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:08

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MamaBearOnLockdown · 07/04/2020 14:08

Pishposhpashy
insulting me won't make your point more relevant. Seems I touched a nerve with you, so you are one of those parents. Poor kids.

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:10

Seriously, my only memory of childhood up to age 10 was having chicken pox in the long hot summer of 1976

So?! Are you saying that none of your experiences in the first decade of your life had any affect on you?

This is nonsense. If our early experiences meant nothing, we could all legitimately ignore our children apart from feeding them and keeping them clean with no ill effects. Do you remember the Romanian orphanages and how damaged the children were? I'm not comparing their situation to now but it's clear our early experiences are pivotal in our development. Just because you can't remember, doesn't mean it doesn't matter.

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:13

YABU. They’re only kids

Some truly unpleasant people on this thread

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:13

I'm actually shocked that so many on here are arguing that young children will have no ill effects brought on from this. It is well documented that early experiences are extremely important. Even foetuses in the womb are affected by stress.

Seems I touched a nerve with you, so you are one of those parents

One of what parents? I haven't been crying or upset in front of my son, if that's what you mean - as I've generally been feeling OK myself.

In any case, I work in early years and it is no bad thing for children to see their parents displaying emotion. It is healthy to be sad sometimes - we all are. No child benefits from a parent who bottles everything up and pretends to be happy all the time.

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:14

formerbabe

Shocking, isn't it. Especially given the number of posters who usually jump on parents for the most innocuous things. Clearly showing their true colours as people who just like to be nasty for no good reason.

MamaBearOnLockdown · 07/04/2020 14:16

so many on here are arguing that young children will have no ill effects brought on from this.

you should read the thread. People are arguing that children will only have ill effects if the parents made it so (again, provided the parents are not one of the victims).
Being a bit bored and a bit sad doesn't mean the children have to be traumatised for life. Some people really need to get a grip. Insulting others who dare disagreeing doesn't make it likely you will show such a mature attitude towards your own kids.

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:18

People are arguing that children will only have ill effects if the parents made it so

Bollocks.

The parents I work with who live in high rise, one bedroom flats with more than one child (usually due to domestic violence) will be having an absolutely awful time right now, due to no fault of their own. It doesn't matter how outwardly happy they are or how many games they play, those children are going to suffer.

I assume you a qualified early years practitioner as your comments suggest absolutely no understanding whatsoever of the psyche of children.

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:19

@Pishposhpashy. Yes it's sad that so many people, who are probably parents, are so dismissive about children's feelings.

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:22

It's actually more concerning to me that so many are advocating not showing emotion in front of your children. No wonder we have so many adults in this country completely incapable of discussing or dealing with negative emotions.

MamaBearOnLockdown · 07/04/2020 14:24

I assume you a qualified early years practitioner as your comments suggest absolutely no understanding whatsoever of the psyche of children.

reading your comments, I can tell you have no idea what you are talking about. But reading your own random opinion was fun, useless but fun. Enjoy.

Pishposhpashy · 07/04/2020 14:26

reading your comments, I can tell you have no idea what you are talking about. But reading your own random opinion was fun, useless but fun. Enjoy.

I'd missed out a "not" in that sentence.

Was merely pointing out that I assume your total lack of empathy was due to ignorance about early years development. Which it clearly is.

My opinion isn't random.

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:34

If you give them a proper childhood, no child need to come out of this with their "mental health" damaged

Your ignorance is staggering

BlueMoon1103 · 07/04/2020 14:35

Some PPs on here are really horrible. I feel desperately sorry for my 1 year old whose behaviour has changed dramatically with all this. No HE won’t remember how this summer was ruined by CV but I bloody will! And that’s sad.

I hate the attitude that unless you’re dying of CV you can’t complain or be sad and have to be constantly ‘positive’. That’s called Toxic Positivity and it’s not helpful.

@PrettyLittleLiar20 I totally agree and yes it’s normal for your children to be sad, they’re not as easily distracted as some people think and for anyone who says 1 year olds don’t get bored (saw this on another thread) I can assure you, mine does!

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:38

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MamaBearOnLockdown · 07/04/2020 14:39

formerbabe

do personal attacks really make you feel better?

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:41

I can tell you have no idea what you are talking about. But reading your own random opinion was fun, useless but fun. Enjoy

Says the poster who wrote this Hmm

formerbabe · 07/04/2020 14:41

Oh and I'd love to know what a "proper" childhood is?

MamaBearOnLockdown · 07/04/2020 14:42

Says the poster who wrote this in reply to a comment directly addressed to me. HTH Wink

Howmanysleepsnow · 07/04/2020 14:42

It’s worse for the children and adults that are old enough to understand!

Srslydontgiveacrap · 07/04/2020 14:44

Get a grip and find something else to do with your DD

SleepingStandingUp · 07/04/2020 15:13

They need to know about the bug, but it's not necessary to show them pile of bodies, people hooked up in hospital, frontline staff in tears, the risk when you try to get them food and so on. I think some on here think that's exactly what we should do so the sad ungrateful little brats can realise how lucky thry are.

They’re only kids; they’ll get over it because they won’t even remember it.
I suspect the they're only kids bit vs they're kids is what's splitting opinion. Whether we consider kids to just be something to be endured and shut up as much as possible

HOW is it different for the child who is told to stay home, is not allowed outside, to meet his friends, go to the playground?
Chicken pox is tangible. "when the spots go / when the itches go / when you feel better" is easier for kids to get than "when Boris says / when Corona leaves" etc
Chicken pox directly affects them so it makes sense. "I am spotty and I will make my friends spotty. Thry will feel poorly like me. I must stay home." vs some people out there are ill, you might get ill, you might not get ill but you might make granny ill.
Chicken pox is generally time limited. "we can go out on 3 weeks" and if they're better before Brill. This is limitless. People say after Easter, after half term, summer, autumn, winter. No one knows.

Lordfrontpaw · 07/04/2020 15:15

Can we go to the park?
I’ve got a better idea - let’s have a teddy bears picnic and build a tent indoors!

Little children are easier to distract. It’s the adults losing their jobs I worry about (and obviously those sick and working with the public).