to think just because its lockdown doesn't mean you can forget birthdays

[pheasanteggs]

Parents and siblings announced that they're not sending anything this year. Siblings too. DP says we will do something for my birthday after lockdown.

As a creative person I think birthdays can be extra special during lockdown. Birthdays should be celebrated. Here are ideas on how to make someones birthday special during a lockdown for anyone who needs ideas

-Make an incredibly ambitious cake together, finding creative inspiration online

• treasure hunt involving clues leading to a gift
• beautiful walk with whoever you are self-isolating with
• picnic at home in the garden
• decorate the kitchen with lots of birthday signs
• birthday music
• games night with friends and family online over video chat
• With kids its easier, kids party games, musical statues and musical bumps
• Moon pig and other online card companies if you can't leave the house
• Many online gift companies are still operating
• Movie night with popcorn
• 3 course fancy meal with decorated table
• buy a kit and make cocktails, soap
• hang a sign from your window 'Happy birthday X'

If you're lucky enough to have a garden or have kids it's easier.

You don't need to forget about birthdays but by the same token you are being very OTT and I say this as someone who organised an 18th birthday on lockdown and will more than likely miss my own.

Moonpig (as far as I know) are not operating currently so that's out, we can't get flour for love nor money (you're better off just buying a cake and card as part of your weekly shop) and just because you can order things online doesn't mean you should.

Luckily I had a few things before the 18th party so it wasn't a total washout. I decorated the house, gave her some presents and a cake I picked up in Tesco and ordered her pizza and we had a movie night: that's quite sufficient under the circumstances.

It's my birthday today and it's been a lovely day. I've had flowers, champagne and chocolate truffles delivered and we're having a takeaway (local one is still open) for dinner.
I've also had lots of messages and phone calls from friends and family.
I wasn't expecting anything really apart from flowers from DH so I am very touched by people's thoughtfulness.
We had a few things planned that obviously can't go ahead at the moment but they will be re-arranged later. I was disappointed when i realised a few weeks ago that It was all going to go tits-up but we are well and I'm grateful for what i have.
I don't mean to sound like a Pollyanna but if your nearest and dearest are well but ignoring your birthday that's a bit shit.

My.birthday.tomorrow. i hope something nice is done!

You sound high maintenance. Can't be doing with adults that go on about birthdays.
My mum does it. She's very creative and crafty and spends hours making different things.
I don't tell her but I hide most of it as I think wtf am I supposed to do with that??

We can’t see our grandchildren. We can’t send them anything for their birthdays because I can’t get to the post office to buy stamps or send parcels.

I have lovely gifts that I bought for them way before this started but until this is over they won’t get them.

I think for some people, celebrating your birthday after lockdown just makes it easier on them to not bother. I would never forget a birthday as long as the postal service is still running. During these particularly crap times, a little gift or card in the post means even more than usual.

Sorry @llolz that’s awful for you 💐

Well yes @M2B19 but shops are closed and many of us can't get out to the shops or post office. I'm not sure what we can do

@hearhoovesthinkzebras there are places such as moonpig for cards and you can post anything bought online to a different address, that’s what I have done. Obviously if these aren’t available to you then that’s fair enough.

Sometimes I read these posts and find myself thinking “someone desperately wants to get into the Daily Mail”

Sorry op. You sound hard work. Dh and I celebrated our wedding anniversary, we didn’t go to any of that effort, we enjoyed dinner together then we put our pyjamas on.
Anyone else here thinking of the video from U2 ‘Sweetest Thing’?

I dont get y people forget birthdays right now? I received tulips from family (from daughter) on Mothers Day and we received a few easter eggs thru the post recently too

If we are still in lockdown by mid-June then I will be able to get away with no recognition of my birthday at all without it having to be awkward with PIL. This is a big positive from the current situation!

M2B19

Moonpig isn't working. And I can't go to the post office. There aren't many options for on line ordering so I'm now facing ordering just old toot for the sake of ordering something. That just seems like a waste of money.

It's my son's 40th next week and my 60th in August, we both said we will celebrate them both, when this is all over.

I always get so irked by grown adult birthday threads.

Yes YABU.

It's my dads birthday on Sunday. He will get a message and his present etc after lockdown. I wouldn't use lockdown as an excuse not to give something.

Our daughters 16 and 13th birthdays are in June, I will be celebrating their birthday by making a cake, getting banners and possibly a balloon online if possible. We will make it special and try and get their friends involved via Zoom etc.

My husband feels my 40th sneaked up on him last week. He dashed out night before and couldn't got a cake so got Mr Kipling pack of lemon slices. Kids sang happy birthday and I blew out 4 tea lights. He gave me a box of chocs and a magazine. Nothing from kids. Vague promise of we'll celebrate later.
My bestie ordered me some nice skincare which arrived today so a few days late, and my sisters chipped in and sent me a piece of furniture I wanted which was perfect.
I am not disappointed in hubby but ONLY because he always forgets/doesn't care for birthdays. But the kids are young and they need to sing and have birthday cake and get excited no matter who's it is. The kids drew me lovely pictures and wrote me letters, but of their own volition and nothing to do with husband.

I'm surprised how many people leave buying presents etc till the weekend or day before the celebration, something like this is an easy excuse.
It's our wedding anniversary in May, I've had my husband's gift for a couple of weeks now and bought a card while doing a food shop last week.
There's always something they can do, to just say they're not bothering is lazy. I'm with you op

Much of your list can only be done with immediate family.
To expect someone to go to the post office or post box is not on.
Moonpig is a silly option for many people and for many reasons.
To expect delivery/warehouse/packing staff to accommodate your birthday celebration, at this time, is a bit silly. It’s non essential.
Just have a low key , immediate family gathering.

Great ideas OP! We actually had a picnic in the garden for lunch- no special occasion! My ds is 3 next week, we’d planned a trip to the zoo and a little tea party, with a bouncy castle, obviously thats all off so we’ve planned a little bbq instead with just the 4 of us. Everything needed I already have from food, to balloons and banners, as well as all his presents. The trampoline can act as a bouncy castle instead! I want to make it special for him (he was really poorly when born and nearly didn’t make it twice) and he doesn’t need to know any different. DD’s birthday is mid June, I’d planned a surprise to a concert for her as her present, which I fear may be cancelled soon. So probably another bbq!

Not sending something is not the same as forgetting a birthday. A lot of people are avoiding sending things right now to help reduce the strain on the postal service, even MoonPig is warning it's making fewer cards right now due to the significant increased demand and postal issues.

If it really bothers you that others are not celebrating your birthday as you wish, then take it up with them. Relationships should involve communication, compromise, and empathy - both ways. There could be multiple reasons why they'd rather wait until lockdown is over that should be considered. While I think it can definitely be worth the effort to celebrate special days, no one should be guilted and there is little point in doing so. One of the worst presents/birthdays I got as a kid was because my mother felt guilty that my grandmother had bought me presents. I can't remember how many birthdays I didn't get something from her, I had more forgotten birthdays than not as a kid, but I remember that guilt gift & how shitty it made me feel in detail. Give me warmly spoken words over a surprises or obligated fun any time.

I'm surprised how many people leave buying presents etc till the weekend or day before the celebration,

I haven't. My dds birthday is in May but I've already been shielded for three weeks. If only I had bought everything and taken it down in February!

Birthdays are just not a priority right now.

I won't be sending any cards, but will do online greetings.

This is tricky, I can see why people are not sending gifts. Both my girls had their Birthdays at the end of March as did Grandpa. Luckily I had already bought their presents. We had lots of wonderful cards from friends and family by post. We had enough flour to make really fun cakes and we decorated the house with things we already had. We couldn’t be with Grandpa so we made him lots of cards and send him party hats flat packed. We posted the cards on our daily walk. Writing has become a big thing in our house the last few weeks, lots more hand written cards and letters rather than emails. We will be celebrating again with friends and family when we can. I hope you manage to have a Happy Birthday and receive some lovely cards. 🎂