People who have moved countries

[Amymayapple]

How do you introduce yourself?

I was born in England and I moved to Ireland when I was age 7. I have an Irish accent. I grew up in Ireland, but I don't live there anymore.

If people ask me where I am from and I say England, they say to me, immediately "that is not an English accent".

If I say I am from Ireland, it feels wrong , because I am English. And I feel English. But I have an Irish accent.

I spend way too much time stressing about this when I introduce myself, because people make me explain myself.

I would just love to say "Hi I am ann, I am from England".

Not

"Hi I am Ann, I am from England"

"You don't SOUND English, hahaha"

"Well I was born in England, and we moved to Ireland".

It is a big song and dance every time, and it is extra stressful because I have gotten insults about being both English and Irish in the past.

How would you introduce yourself in this situation?

www.quora.com/Do-the-British-Isles-include-Ireland?top_ans=31837725

Good answer here

I guess I have the opposite problem to a lot of you here - an English accent, living in Ireland. So depressing sometimes. Just goes to show there’s arseholes in the Uk and arseholes in Ireland!! If it’s any comfort to you all, I really think an awful lot of people don’t really care where you’re from, they’ll take you as they find you. But I have to say, despite coming here on holidays as a kid before moving here years later, I underestimated some people’s hatred here of the English. Didn’t realise as we stayed with relatives and were sheltered from it I think. But bollocks, I’m here now and anyone who doesn’t like it can stick it. I have a good few lovely Irish friends and won’t be drawn into judging a whole nation on some of the shite I’ve had levelled at me by some others. It seems from this that there’s some Irish experiencing the same in the Uk. That’s also depressing. Aren’t humans stupid. Op, don’t overthink it, find the quickest way of explaining your background and if people abuse you, it says more about them than you.

I think another part of the issue is how we use the English language in the UK - we refer to Manchester, Leeds etc as the ‘North’ and in Ireland that means something very different. Those differences are obvious to anyone who knows that geographical issues are also political during an ongoing conflict. You have to have an understanding of how Ireland sees things to understand these nuances and many English people don’t - they are applying what they see as the logical explanation based on how they see things and not aware of the political dimension.

@Scratchyback

Yes well said. I made some really lovely, cherished friends there who went out of their way but we are shielded from it when we see family. Makes me realise that they had to put themselves out a lot growing up.

@Iwannabeadored20

When you said: "We need to go back to putting the focus on who we are by choice not by default. Our interests, hobbies, character"

Totally agree - to which I would also add "our thoughts". So much of what we do and how we feel is controlled by a brain acting in default. If we put ourselves in the driving seat and choose the thoughts we want to think, we soon learn that nothing anyone ever says can really affect us. How we decide to act or react is completely optional and, happily, 100% up to us :-)

Isn't it wonderful to be have such dialogue on what, on the surface, seemed to be just an everyday question on how to introduce oneself.

I hear you, OP.

I’ve mostly accepted ‘where are you from?’ as I think people are mainly curious but the question does make me cringe.

It’s hard being different and that question just highlights it.

@annacharles111

Completely. Yes to thoughts. Very powerful.

I do find though it is harder than ever to select and choose as opposed to respond or reject. I think that is the effect of the tone and hostility that underpins so much discussion online and off now - everyone is hyped up.

Could you say “Irish born, English bred” and move on?

I have to say, on the subject of the term 'the British Isles', having done an unscientific survey of my cousins and old school friends on FB yesterday evening, the term is acceptable to them all.

The age range is early 30s to 60s, and the average would be mid 50s. Politically, we are all over the place.

My mother, late 80s, daughter of an old IRA man and a member of the Cumann na mBan, has no problem with the term either.

They all see a distinction between the geographical term and the political states.

An analogy - while the UK voted for Brexit and will leave the EU, it is still in Europe, geographically speaking.

We all realise that alternative terms are preferred by some, but nobody feels a sense of urgency about abandoning what we were all taught in school.

Thank you! @mathanxiety I was frustrated at people getting offended about it earlier.

It is a geographical term, referring to the group of islands.

How are you doing in lockdown @mathanxiety

Fine so far, knock on wood...
I bought lots of cans of beans and tomatoes, and also pasta and rice in dribs and drabs over December and January as we had the Polar Vortex in late January last year and I thought it best to be prepared if it happened again. But covid-19 struck instead.

I like it when I say "I'm from North-East England" and they say "ooh, Scotland, how nice"

I'm sorry you've encountered so many rude people. It's never been that much of a big deal for me as people just guess I'm English because I speak the language with a strong English accent. I probably sound like the policeman in Allo, Allo.

I was frustrated at people getting offended about it earlier.

As a proponent of free speech I am all for your getting to choose what comes out of your own mouth @Amymayapple, but you do not get to choose who gets offended by it. You've had articles posted on here with hundreds of Irish people voicing their objection to the term 'The British Isles' in the comments section. You've had links posted that lay out the Irish governments refusal to include it in the wording of the Good Friday Agreement. If you choose to ignore ample evidence of Irish sentiment opposing 'The British Isles' as a reference to their nation, that's your right, but prepare yourself for plenty of "frustration."

@LouiseCollina I just asked my 100 per cent Irish friend what he thinks about the term "the British Isles". He said he was fine with it. That it is a geographical term referring to the location of the islands.

See on this thread - a daughter of an IRA man, said that she is fine with the term "the British Isles".

I really think that it is you who is being immature about it.

@LouiseCollina I didn't even bring up the British Isles on this thread.

Some one said it to me on this thread, and I agreed with them, and then I got the full force of your aggression directed at me.

I don't care what people call them. We can call them the isles.

@LouiseCollina I just don't care anymore. I have lived in Northern Ireland, where I had to walk on eggshells or some one would get offended. I remember working with protestants and catholics, and having to walk on eggshells every day because i had to be so careful what I said.

And where I worked - the catholics in Northern Ireland didn't just hate the English, they hated people from the Republic of Ireland , because they told me that the Republic of Ireland "sat on their arse and did nothing and let them die up there"

I honestly do not care anymore about all the past fighting between Ireland and England.

I want to be like Poland and Germany, and to move the fuck on.