People who have moved countries

[Amymayapple]

How do you introduce yourself?

I was born in England and I moved to Ireland when I was age 7. I have an Irish accent. I grew up in Ireland, but I don't live there anymore.

If people ask me where I am from and I say England, they say to me, immediately "that is not an English accent".

If I say I am from Ireland, it feels wrong , because I am English. And I feel English. But I have an Irish accent.

I spend way too much time stressing about this when I introduce myself, because people make me explain myself.

I would just love to say "Hi I am ann, I am from England".

Not

"Hi I am Ann, I am from England"

"You don't SOUND English, hahaha"

"Well I was born in England, and we moved to Ireland".

It is a big song and dance every time, and it is extra stressful because I have gotten insults about being both English and Irish in the past.

How would you introduce yourself in this situation?

@TheCanterburyWhales I am originally from quite famous capital. I was asked if I know x street or x hotel or x person so many times I lost count😂
There is like million people living there I can't know every Johnny and Mike😂

I tend to say "I was born in Ireland but I'm an Aussie now". I did live in England for 17 years though so people are often confused by my accent. Most Aussies are of mixed origin so it's usually curiosity rather than malice although I appreciate that's not everyone's experience.

Yes I lived in Australia got the usual Pommie insults. I just laughed it off.
Perhaps do the same.

Thanks for that @snowsinwater

I also need to choose carefull where I live next.

Does anyone know if there is much hatred towards the English or Irish in Scotland.

I stayed there for a short time , but not long enough to see.

I just want to live somewhere where I am accepted, and not get racist abuse

Google 'third culture kid'

Who are you hanging out with Cos I'm in a similar position (actually way more complex) and I only ever get people asking out of curiosity and making conversation - never insults - (And Where I live it's almost expected that they don't like the English!)
I do agree it would be nice if it wasn't the first question asked but you can usually deflect people with something along the lines of "ive got an English passport but I've lived all around the place" - only the really persistent (and interested) ask more then I start listing the countries I've lived in and they get bored pretty quickly!
What are you happy to share? Come up with a pithy short line that you can just throw out when you're asked.

Hi @dramalamma I usually go to lots of things

Meetup groups
Hiking groups
Art groups
Music groups.

It is at these group situations , that this happens

I have been living in the UK for 15+ years, but I do have an accent from where I am originally from.
To be honest, despite the British passport, I don't feel British (and I can't as every time I open my mouth people immediately ask- where are you from? No, but really?) which also contributed to it.
I have a British/Malaysian friend who was born here, and still, despite only having visited Malaysia twice in his life and not knowing a word of the language says they are Malaysian, because people see the colour of his skin and it's easier to just say that than Biritsh and have to explain, although he still then has to say why he has 'such a good accent'!.

I just feel like I have developed internal shame about both countries, because I have gotten so many insults about both.

It is not bad to be from England! It is not bad to be from Ireland.

They are both good countries

@MonaLisaDoesntSmile I totall understand!

It is having to explain to so many people, who don't ask nicely alot of the time- it is always said with a "oh you are not really one of us"

@Amymayapple I think it's similar with mixed race people. A Japanese/German friend is Japanese in Germany, and German in Japan. They don't really belong in either country 100%.

I think because I grew up in my home country, it's easier for conversation purposes to say I am from X, and also, deep inside I do feel like being more X than British. It gets more complicated as I am using my British passport for all formalities and when people (in professional capacity) ask for my nationality, there is an awkward pause when I say British...

But in a situation like Connie's, I would think that's fascinating. Your mum moved from India to England at age 15. What a change that must have been! And she was half Indian so her parents story must have been even more interesting. When I meet people who have different backgrounds like that (and Hibiscus, the Soviet Union! Even more fascinating) I think it is so interesting, maybe not for the second or third generation but for your ancestors/relatives who made these brave journeys (I would have loved to have lived abroad but was too chicken to do so) and their history shouldn't disappear because of your awkwardness/nonchalance about your background.

I have lived in England and Ireland and there must be a huge percentage of switching between countries so that doesn't seem as exotic or unusual but most people have a very interesting story in their history, whether they think so or not. My ancestors are from the same place as far back as we can trace and honestly, it makes my background very, very dull and nobody would ever be interested.

I'll take your interesting or colourful "where are you from?" Answers over mine anyday.

I dont see what the issue is , you are making this into a drama when there isnt one. I am Scottish but you wouldnt know by my accent, i have lived in many different countries and have never given who the hell i introduce myself a seconds thought.

if it's a passing conversation I say 'england', if it's probably a lasting contact I'm talking to I'll sAy 'all over they place' then list the countries. It's the toughest question for third culture kids and one I try to avoid simply cos I can't be bothered to answer it. I don't blame people for asking though it's an interesting question how you cultural upbringing effects your current life in so many ways.

How odd. This is my 2nd country in 5 years and I can count the number of people who have asked me that on one hand.

If they do ask I say 'I moved here from London'. That seems to cover pretty much every base!

My kids are like this. DH and I are from different countries and we live in a third country now. We tell our kids to say, “I was born in X” when people ask that. Three passports makes it impossible to say definitively where you are from.

I’ve lived in a few different countries and always found the “oh I’ve lived in several countries - my accent is all over the place!” to be enough to stop any general questions.

Usually though I find that people are just being friendly - asking where someone is from is quite a good way to get to know someone (unless it is done with racial overtones of course!)

I'm American and get some of this. We recently moved to a tiny village after living in the city centre of a city in England and when we met the pub landlord he asked where we're from. I answered we had lived in x neighborhood but later realized he was asking where I'm FROM from haha.

A lot of the time people tell me they'd love to go to where I'm from (NY) or that they loved it there. A not small amount of people bring up 9/11 which can be strange for me--often it's people I've just met bringing it up.

When I worked with the public I had a large amount of people ask me how I have the right to live here. That felt a bit aggressive.

But it tends to be when I've known people a bit longer that they say things that are insulting or offensive. There's a thread this week here about Americanisms which is a lot of people saying how much we annoy them. You would be surprised how many people feel they can say similar things to my face!

my grandparents are from 3 different countries between them, my parents are British and we're born in England, my siblings were born in one eu country, I was born outside the eu and lived there for my toddler years. My primary years spent in an eu country - this country's language is my strongest I think, we moved to a second eu country for my secondary years, not my strongest language but the place I consider home and where I have most friends. I went to uni in England and now live in a different eu country. I honestly don't have a home country. My best language is not where most my friends are, my passport matches neither nor the place I live nor where I consider home. Where are you from? Err how long have you got 😃

I was born in country X (as my mother is from there) and grew up in country Y (where my dad is from).
I have been explaining this to ppl my whole life
Now I live in Britain and have a British passport. And my kids are British and brown.

I love it, I love explaining where I'm from, I think it so interesting to be from so many places.

francienolan I’ve had the same experiences as an American living in England. Quite often it feels rude and aggressive. I was in a taxi recently and when the driver asked where I was from I just said ‘Canada’ and it shut down the conversation.

I have the same problem. My accent doesn't match my place of birth. People always bloody comment on it too.

They can fuck off.

I have a Latvian surname so am always asked about it, where it is from etc. But have never experienced negativity about it, I always thought I would be happy to get. Married and get a."normal" name, but when I did get married by that point thought, no it is my name and I don't want someone else's plain name. I don't mind the conversations about it anymore.

So Sorry that arse holes have led you being self conscious about your accent, fwiw the Irish accent is lovely (I love accents in general though).

I do know what you mean however , I could get a job move to Glasgow and would absolutely love to live there, I adore Scotland, but my son is 9 and has an English accent and I worry that I would be settling him up for some proper bullying as there is very much an anti-English sentiment. And whilst I could quite easily rub along (was at uni in Edinburgh so it isn't awful but definitely there, I would imagine that school kids can be such awful little shits if they want to be).

You would be fine in Scotland with an Irish accent Imo.

I'm with lowlandLucky on this one - I don't see the problem.

OP, your original question was 'People who have moved countries - how do you introduce yourself?'

The simple answer is - I say 'Hi, I'm Havanananana.' I say nothing about where I'm from.. It is of no relevance in any group I'm joining unless there is a language issue - e.g. if I'm joining a multinational group and the others need to know who speaks what for reasons of comprehension or safety.

I have lived in a number of countries. I speak three languages, two of which I learned in rural areas so I speak these with a with strong regional dialect. People from Country A think I'm from there, from B there, and from C there. I don't make any effort to alter this perception as it is usually irrelevant. I am one of Theresa May's 'Citizens of Nowhere' and while she used it as a pejorative term, I am proud to be so. I am 'Me' - my country of birth is in most social and work situations as irrelevant as my age or gender.

The idea of being judged by others based on accent was described long ago by George Bernard Shaw who said 'It is impossible for an Englishman to open his mouth without making some other Englishman hate or despise him.' He wrote a play about it in 1916 - Pygmalion - and the character Henry Higgins utters a very similar phrase in the play. Hopefully things would have moved on over the last 100 years, but I often doubt it.

This is so ridiculous.

Oh I guess you're not from round here you have an accent?

"I'm English but lived in Ireland while growing up so explains the accent"

End of that topic. No-one goes "oh hey, nice to meet you, I'm Jenny, I'm English"

Only time i know when people get difficult is when someone is non White. My daughter is mixed with a Middle Eastern country and I get the hints when they look at her and turn to me and go "so are you originally from england" then I say in brief terms.

But many white people don't have this problem. Don't make one