... to visit grand children after 2 weeks' isolation?

[RidingOn]

They are aged 7 and 9, their father is a single parent, who is working from home. They're OK, no emergency, but I thought he might like some help and a bit of a break.

I don't want to do anything against govt guidelines, but as children of separated parents are allowed to visit both parents, I thought that might apply to (youngish, healthy) grandparents too? Does anyone know? Especially as both households have been in isolation for two weeks, so it's unlikely any of us is carrying it.

You are highly unlikely to catch the virus by going out to exercise or by going to the shops assuming obeying hygiene rules etc. The risk is infinitesimal compared to a normal lifestyle of attending church/friends/toddler groups/cafes/going on the bus etc.

You are highly unlikely to catch the virus by going out to exercise or by going to the shops assuming obeying hygiene rules etc. The risk is infinitesimal compared to a normal lifestyle of attending church/friends/toddler groups/cafes/going on the bus etc.

This - I think paranoia is starting to creep in and that is bad for mental health

Hundreds of Nannies of a different kind are still going into work daily as it's a grey area for them. They can't work from home so their employers are giving many of them the option to work or leave. So it makes a farce out of a grandparent not being able to help, where is the difference? I'm in the stay home unless key worker camp.

@Grandadwasthatyou the difference being that the OP has clearly recently lost her daughter, and has said herself she has recently been in a "bubble" which is bloody understandable. so she came on here to ask if this was okay before doing it - she didnt actually do it did she and she has taken onboard what people have, very nastily actually, said.

Thank you to the people who have given me ideas for how I can help my son-in-law from a distance, and for your condolences.

@Worriedmum I know, it's hard to accept when it seems illogical, especially, as I probably don't fully grasp the science behind it. That's why it helps to talk it through if you have a question. I'm trying to take responsibility for not being fully informed/aware. I will also start watching Channel 4 News again ...

I would say yes on with certain conditions.
After you've seen your grandchildren you go straight home.Neither you or your son/grandchildren leave their houses for shopping/exercise,anything.
If any of you get ill,including your grandchildren,no matter how bad it gets you do not call the NHS/ambulance /undertaker.
If you can do all this then go ahead.

OP something I suggested earlier upthread I think may be nice for you to do:

FaceTime or Skype them while they are having dinner and you are having yours as if you're having a family dinner.

I've also been making some fun lessons for my god daughter who is 9 - while I do an hour or so lesson with her on facetime (I say lesson, I'm not a teacher but have found the lockdown learning thread on MN great) her mum has a lovely bath or a glass of wine. Maybe something similar would be nice for your son in law.

I've been doing similar when at the end of a day my god daughter will FaceTime me and tell me what she's learned, to keep her occupied while her mum gets a break!

And lastly I've been giving her a drawing challenge over her mums whatsapp and give her a little deadline to finish it by - I do the same challenge and we show each other on FaceTime. Again a break for mum and some nice quality time for me and little one.

Would you feel that stuff could work for you and your grand children via FaceTime / Skype / zoom? I know it's not the same but it's the next best thing.

I'm sorry again I feel terrible I hadn't realised the circumstances and I do see this is much harder for you than many people

@RidingOn i pm'd you x

"I stopped watching the News."

I tape the BBC stuff and ff through the bits, that i don't need to know (for the self employed erc). There's been questions and answers bits and summaries, which are useful.

I also Google the science bits.
It's actually reassuring. The death rate makes you grateful that you're not a part of it, in any way. I go on other news sources and get see how people are doing in much worse conditions. It puts is sitting in our brick built houses, with Internet etc, in perspective.

Thank you @BackseatCookers and others for ideas .

I am sorry, genuinely sorry, that your grandchildren have lost their mother. It does make it harder than, say, me allowing our parents to isolate due to their own underlying conditions. At a time when your grandchildren need every comfort, I can utterly understand why you wanted to be able to visit, give them a hug and reassure them that everything will be ok.

I hope you find ways in which to remain connected with your son and his children in these challenging times. Maybe a package from Nanny??

You don’t have it because you’ve been isolated and you’d have been sick by now. Your DC and GDC don’t have it for the same reason. There’s no reason why you can’t get together when you’re both obviously clear

I haven’t been out or seen anyone for the past 3 weeks. My grandchildren haven’t been out for 2 weeks. Can I go and see my GC? Can the 5 sets of grandparents on my road go and see their GC? Can the thousands of GP on MN go and see their GC?

Can you see the reason for lockdown now? If it’s good enough for one it’s good enough for everyone!

Before lockdown, I left 'holiday' presents at the house for them, and Easter presents too, but I have been thinking of sending some more. The only problem is aren't we supposed not to send things by post if they're not urgent? There aren't enough delivery slots?

@Worriedmum54321 so do you think people should follow the government guidance or is it ok to ignore it?

@RidingOn you can definitely send them things in the post. I’m sure they’d love that.

You can send stuff by post.
Delivery slots refers to supermarket home deliveries.

Oh OP, it’s a rubbish situation.

I’m assuming that when lockdown is lifted it will be transitional and visiting family and friends will be the first thing to come back way before we are allowed in mass gatherings again. A week at my ILs is planned for as soon as we are allowed, whether that be next week or next month or next year.

You can definitely send stuff in the post.

Walks to the post box are the only walks I’m doing with my young DC. We’re sending drawings to relatives and get well soon cards and little notes to school friends... it’s helping.

Yes, you can send things by post but don't go out specially to buy them, as we're only supposed to be out shopping for essentials. I guess you could buy things online and it would make sense to have those delivered direct to you DG and SIL. Why not send them letters, write them their own stories, write something about your childhood for them? Presents don't always have to involve spending money as pp shows ...

You are NOT supposed to mix with anyone from a different household!!!!!
The guidance isn't difficult!

It has probably already been said but if you don't like watching the news just read the daily updates online or an an app from bbs or Sky News where all the key points are listed. You won't be the only one in a bubble. Try and do the nice things from afar

BBC that was mean to say!

@RidingOn There's a lady on YouTube doing a photography challenge for kids. You could possibly do this with your grandchildren and show your photos over email or via something like WhatsApp. It might give you a fun thing to do 'together' and chat about.

Alternatively you could read a bedtime story over Skype/Zoom/FaceTime while dad grabs a quiet coffee?

No, unless there's a medical/care need. If your son needs to go to work, providing childcare would be within the care clause but should be avoided so only if he really needs to go to work!

My kids haven’t seen their dad for a month. We both agreed that it’s the safest thing for them. This kind of rule bending makes a mockery of everyone else’s efforts.