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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Viewing the neighbours differently after this?

193 replies

bmbonanza · 04/04/2020 12:38

Neighbours are a nice older couple. Friday afternoon they had a BBQ - two cars arrived. Today they have packed the dog in the car and left at 9am, presumably since they both went, with the dog, and are not back 4 hours later, its not an essential shopping trip so guessing they have done what the do most weekends and gone to visit their children and grandkids.

I always thought of them as 'nice people' - Am I being unreasonable to think I will view them differently at the end of all this.

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 04/04/2020 12:39

YANBU. Selfish fools.

Thighmageddon · 04/04/2020 12:40

I will never view some of my neighbours the same either.

LoveFameTragedy · 04/04/2020 12:41

I actually view some of my neighbours more warmly than before.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 04/04/2020 12:42

I live next to an ex police officer and I’ve been amazed to see him coming and going from his house as though nothing has changed, and his girlfriend turning up and staying a night or two then going.

PickwickThePlockingDodo · 04/04/2020 12:44

My neighbours have their grown up children round for a bbq. Bloody hypocrites were clapping for the nhs the other day.
I would complain to the police except his DS is a policeman 🤦‍♀️

DeeCeeCherry · 04/04/2020 12:47

I have the nosiest neighbour ever; I do tend to tolerate her though as she can be nice. However she's self-isolating and her Son, who lives elsewhere with his partner and their DCs, has been visiting her every evening.

Were it someone else having visitors round against government guidelines she'd be shouting her big mouth off going around to other neighbours telling them what so n so across the road is up to. But of course now, she's noticeably quiet.

I'm going to actively avoid her when all this is over, and won't even hide the fact I'm doing so. I don't blame you for how you feel, people's silliness and hypocrisy over current crisis might mean a longer lockdown. I will be seriously pissed off if we are still on lockdown in Summer.

YouTheCat · 04/04/2020 12:47

One set of neighbours seem to have disappeared (way before lockdown) but the teenager still seems to be there sometimes. At least their howling hound isn't there any more. Other neighbours (2 adults, 3 kids) buggered off after lockdown (presumably to one of their parents) but have left their dog which they come and feed once a day. Other neighbours' son is visiting daily, coming to hoover out his car, etc. despite his elderly, vulnerable grandfather living in the house. I'm not much of a fan of neighbours but at least it's quiet. Smile

TellySavalashairbrush · 04/04/2020 12:49

Same here. One of my neighbours has spent decades proclaiming how vulnerable she is health wise, yet almost every day since the lockdown began she’s been going out to visit her adult daughter, having the whole family back to hers, nipping out for takeaways. She regularly used to knock here and come in to chat and has tried a few times since. Fortunately I have one of those camera door bells and now just talk via that- I’ve almost certainly got/had Covid but even telling her that hasn’t deterred her!

breakingbetter · 04/04/2020 12:49

Next door's son has just turned up and gone into the house, so not just dropping stuff off. Mother's Day her whole family was over - 2 sons, wives and children.

She's not vulnerable in any sense of the word, still goes to work everyday and does everything for herself.

I do really like her, she's a very nice person but I'm quite shocked at her behaviour in this.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 04/04/2020 12:51

Same. Well one neighbour who seems to think she's in the stasi.

RandomUser3049 · 04/04/2020 12:52

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

h3av3n · 04/04/2020 12:53

They could be exercising. Seriously, view them differently!? For going out when you dont believe they should...? That's crazy... how strange...

Frankiecandle · 04/04/2020 12:54

I'd be viewing the neighbours who stand all day at their windows watching my comings and goings differently, yes.

YouTheCat · 04/04/2020 12:59

I doubt the rspca would be bothered. The dog is fed and taken in the garden to pee. They are crap pet owners at all other times as well. Dog rarely gets walked at the best of times. When they got this dog, they abandoned their cat. They are not nice people.

A few years ago they went on holiday for a week, with someone popping in to see to the dog once a day. The dog totally destroyed their sofa while they were away.

Thighmageddon · 04/04/2020 13:01

I'd be viewing the neighbours who stand all day at their windows watching my comings and goings differently, yes.

Some of us don't need to be standing at the window.

Some of us can see what's going on whilst sat on the sofa watching tv.

Some of us that are in and can see what's going on can see our neighbours meeting up and doing stuff together.

Some of us would rather we couldn't see all this so we close our blinds and sit in semi-darkness but unfortunately can still hear the neighbours.

cherrybunx0 · 04/04/2020 13:03

yabu because you actually have no idea what they are doing or why.

you are assuming

Frankiecandle · 04/04/2020 13:04

Some of you like need binoculars to get a better view.

Frankiecandle · 04/04/2020 13:04

Random like in that post Grin

newyearnoeu · 04/04/2020 13:06

I thought my neighbours were knobs before. Now I know they're utter, massive knobs Grin

ColourMyDreams · 04/04/2020 13:07

Glad you're not my neighbours. I'm forever in and out of the house. Going to work, supermarket, walking the dog, gardening etc.
Your index fingers would be worn out from dialling the snoopers hotline.

mencken · 04/04/2020 13:08

kids are full of infection so they will pay for this. And so will those who have to treat them.

stay well clear!

Jaggerypokery · 04/04/2020 13:08

Yep I am pissed off with neighbour in flat beneath mine. Out visiting family and friends every day (I can hear her on the phone making arrangements) and last night had her nephew for a film and sleepover. A guy down the road was carted off to hospital by paramedics in full PPE the other week. The poor soul died on Thursday. Neighbour saw the ambulance and him being loaded into it so it’s not like she doesn’t understand that this is pretty bloody serious. She is not unintelligent but appears to be wilfully ignoring the lockdown.

Goodnighttv · 04/04/2020 13:10

To be honest I don’t feel it’s my place to judge anyone on how they’re coping with lockdown. I have no idea what most of the people on my street do for a living, whether they are key workers, I don’t know how many sets of vulnerable people they could be picking up food or prescriptions for, I have no idea what mental health struggles they could be dealing with...

I live on a busy street, and am on nodding/chatting terms with about 5 sets of neighbours but I don’t have a clue how many times any of them are leaving the house, or whose GDC are visiting or what! Confused

I certainly won’t be viewing them any differently after this is over - as far as I can see everyone is trying their best.

Devlesko · 04/04/2020 13:11

I live in a close community and see my neighbours daily, at a distance over the fence. Nothing has changed, but we know them very well.

How do you know they are visiting family, they might just have the dog out for a bit.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 04/04/2020 13:11

They're arses....