Man with persistent cough shopping with partner - just why?!?

[Defenbaker]

I went shopping today, for essential items, to a large supermarket. There was a small queue, with a security guard letting people enter as others left, to ensure social distancing inside. All very calm and not many people inside, so that was good.

However, in the second aisle there was a man coughing. I thought, oh well, it's probably nothing, just an ordinary cough, don't panic. I avoided him anyway, just in case. However, he then kept on coughing, at regular intervals, all around the shop. He never once used a tissue, or even his hand or the crook of his arm to catch the cough, and the cough was just the sort of dry, persistent cough that medics have described as a symptom! Regardless of whether he had the Covid19 virus or not, he was certainly not being careful to keep his germs to himself. I wondered how many people he could be infecting.

Although I tried my best to avoid him, he then appeared quite near me, where I was using the self scan till. This conversation took place:

Me: "It might be a good idea if you wait outside while your partner does the shopping, as you have a cough."

(He looked stunned, as though the idea hadn't occurred to him.)
Him: "Oh, it's just a cough, I don't have a temperature!"

Me: "That's a symptom, you might have it, you don't know."
Him: "I've been to the doctor... I don't have it."

Me: "So, have you had the test then? Did you have a negative result?"
Him: "The doctor said I'm fine... " (He looked shifty, like he was tempted to lie but found it difficult while I fixed my gaze on him.)
Me: "Even if you haven't got it, people are bound to be anxious when you're coughing all over the store. It really would be best if you wait outside."
Him: "Mmm... maybe... "

All the time his partner said nothing. I got the impression she was a bit embarassed to be with him, as she knew how others would view his germ ridden presence.

He then sloped off. AIBU to think that he had no reason to accompany another (able bodied) adult around the shop, and should have known better than to behave so thoughtlessly during this health crisis?

as she didn't speak a word in his defence
My DP is a man over 50 years of age. I wouldn't speak up for him either. If he cant speak for himself by that age he needs to learn. Could we (general we) infantilise men any more?

Enough4me posted:

"Posters aren't reading the full thread. OP has answered multiple times to say that she regrets the last part of the communication with the man.

Posters are still venting as though she created the virus in her kitchen and should be ready to be stoned by an angry mob. Get over yourselves. The coughing twat probably doesn't care and is already in another shop hacking over some veg."

@Enough4me Thanks for that - your first sentence saves me posting yet again to reiterate the same point.

Also, loving your second point, which made me LOL.

Haven't read the full thread, but they reckon that the cough can go on for weeks after you are no longer contagious. That is definitely our experience so far in this house, no sign of coughs abating here yet.

I am not going to be particularly suspicious of people with coughs.

My Dad has had a persistent cough all his life. He hates it more than you ever will. Not everyone coughing is an idiot.

Yanbu Really, he could have at least been using a tissue.

If he had lung cancer there's a good chance he wouldn't be out in a supermarket. Suggesting he waits outside is perfectly acceptable.

My mum has COPD. She coughs all day every day. She isn't supposed to be out at the moment but if she was she would cough all around the shops too. She hasnt got Covid19.

If he had lung cancer there's a good chance he wouldn't be out in a supermarket.

Why? People with lung cancer do go out. They are allowed.

Suggesting he waits outside is perfectly acceptable.

No of course it's not acceptable to tell a perfect stranger he should wait outside the supermarket. What planet are you on where you think that's an ok thing to say to people

What does it take for the message to sink in? wake up and smell the coffee

The virus doesn't move to us, we move it to others.

Two NHS nurses have died today. More will die doing their best for us.

If you have a cough stay at home or wait outside a shop or at least collect your germs in a tissue and double bag at home.

If you have a cough stay at home or wait outside a shop or at least collect your germs in a tissue and double bag at home
Well ya know I'll just starve then.
I've only had my productive cough for about umm 40 years.
Fuck off dear.

No of course it's not acceptable to tell a perfect stranger he should wait outside the supermarket. What planet are you on where you think that's an ok thing to say to people

Planet Mumsnet. Approximately 730,000,000 km from Earth.

No I won't as my point is valid, but how about those who openly cough over food fuck off?

My DB has a permanent cough (under investigation) no visible signs of what’s been causing it for 2years. He needs to eat. What do you want him to do?

Why won't you even consider using a tissue Banana?

I cough a lot but I wear a scarf. People do stare angrily but I ignore them. They of course could be carrying covid 19 and be completely unaware.

1. Partner/ friend does the shopping.
2. No partner / friend use a tissue.

Since when was it normal to cough over other people?

I most certainly do. Most revolting to not. But OP was not about using a tissue. OP was about berating some complete stranger. I've said in previous posts on this very thread, it would have been ok to tell him (not ask) to cover his mouth.
What's not ok is quizzing someone.

My mum had COPD so, sadly, I can recognise a COPD cough.

Detroit bus driver dies of coronavirus after posting video about passenger coughing

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/apr/03/detroit-bus-driver-dies-coronavirus-video-passenger-coughing

Jason Hargrove died less than two weeks after expressing concern about passenger coughing without covering her mouth

Glad the voting doesn't reflect some of the nasty comments on here. Some people seem incapable of commenting without being rude, unpleasant and spiteful. Says a lot about them really. Op as you can see most people agree with you.

If you have had a cough for years, then still cover your mouth

• you could be infectious anyway

Yanbu op. I've scanned the first page of responses and am losing my faith in common sense and reasoning.

It's really no wonder this virus is spreading like wildfire with the levels of stupidity in people.

1. This couple shouldn't have been shopping together, we have been told one adult to do the shopping
2. The security shouldn't have let them in together
3. He was coughing persistently and not covering his mouth at all. Not only is that a disgusting way to behave in public anyway, during a freaking killer pandemic it's absolute madness!!!
4. There's so many surfaces in a supermarket, including all the stock! Stock doesn't get cleaned, it gets touched and picked up by innocent people unaware they are now transferring this virus or other germs into their homes.
5. If he was coughing due to a medical issue he especially should be AT HOME!!!!
6. It's everyone's bloody business right now as people like him and all the other idiots who don't listen to the rules are out and about everywhere thinking the rules don't apply to them!!!

PEOPLE ARE DYING BY SEVERAL HUNDRED EVERY DAY IN THE UK!!!

Stay the fuck home!

Lung cancer? Wtf?
If he had lung cancer he’d be an absolute moron to be going shopping during these times

@CallMeRachel
Totally agree- for him to not cover his mouth is disgusting - it doesn’t matter what’s wrong with him. I do not want people coughing over me during a pandemic when the main symptom is a fcking cough. Have people lost their minds? Wow.

1. This couple shouldn't have been shopping together, we have been told one adult to do the shopping

You don't know the circumstances.

2. The security shouldn't have let them in together

Maybe he let them in because he did know the circumstances

3. He was coughing persistently and not covering his mouth at all. Not only is that a disgusting way to behave in public anyway, during a freaking killer pandemic it's absolute madness!!!

Yes it's disgusting but it doesn't give strangers the right to tell him he would be better waiting outside.

4. There's so many surfaces in a supermarket, including all the stock! Stock doesn't get cleaned, it gets touched and picked up by innocent people unaware they are now transferring this virus or other germs into their homes.

You are suggesting this man behaved in a manner to which you have no actual idea.

4. If he was coughing due to a medical issue he especially should be AT HOME!!!!

Don't be so ridiculous. There are many medical reasons for a cough. Also, adults are allowed to choose whether to sheild or not based on their medical history.

5. It's everyone's bloody business right now as people like him and all the other idiots who don't listen to the rules are out and about everywhere thinking the rules don't apply to them!!!

What rules? The only rule we know for certain he broke was not using a tissue.

You want to try having to work alongside people who knowingly come to work with symptoms and then management dithered about sending them home even though they are coughing up blood in a supermarket warehouse (that's what my husband has endured today at work .)