Shitty experience on supermarket

[TinyStripe]

Went to supermarket today. First day out after 14 days at home. Shoppers we're all pretty vigilant about social distancing but a few staff members didn't bother. One walked past me from behind and actually brushed past me then stopped dead on front of me. I asked if she wouldn't mind moving 2 metres away. She apologised and smiled and didn't seem too bothered by my comment. I felt my frustration levels rising and ended up finishing my shop early. I was there with my son. Someone in the queue said 'cannot believe how many selfish fuckwits bring their kids to the supermarket' - clearly aimed at me. I ignored. WIBU, to feel frustrated by the lack of social distancing, and by the comment? WIBU to take my son to the supermarket, considering I am a single mother living on my own? I burst in to tears in the car (ok, a lot of this is also due to being at home with my son and feeling really low in general). Just not a great experience and feel nervous to go shopping again in a couple of weeks.

In supermarket not on supermarket

Yeah I get you OP. Not many people are respecting social distancing in shops. There’s too many people in at once.

I know Tesco have introduced a limit to the number of people in at one time but imo it hasn’t worked. There were still people too close to me

Some people are arseholes. The current situation seems to be bringing them all out of the woodwork & giving them license to express their arseholery. Try to ignore, get on with your business, & get home safely.

No, you're not being U. You may get people saying ask neighbours/on local Facebook help groups to go, but with the item restrictions it just means someone else has to go twice. I also think here, quite rightly, those groups are prioritising those who cannot go out at all.

It's a known phenomenon that people become complacent about any safety issue. Which is why the staff, who are working every day, are less vigilant than you, who has been home 14 days. You'll see more of it until people actually know people who get sick and die. Then we'll all get better at it for a while.

It actually made me feel stupid for trying to stay 2m away from people.

@TinyStripe it’s not stupid. You are doing the right thing. The stupid people are the ones who don’t realise you can’t be too close to others at a time like this.

If they do get close, tell them to back off

1 Obviously it would be much better if people would not bring children shopping, but I can’t see what your other options are unless your child is old enough to be left alone.

2 It is extremely difficult to keep 2m away from everyone all the time, and I’m sure the staff member didn’t do it on purpose. If you found the experience unnerving for less than an hour, imagine how they feel in that environment for 5 full days a week. I think YABU to complain about that.

I’m sorry you had a bad experience .

It’s all weird at the moment. In my store we’re doing our best to keep 2m from the customers and each other.

Nobody I’ve heard is judging a lone parent. Just the couples and two parent families who keep coming in and treating it like it’s a day out .

YANBU It's not a pleasant atmosphere at all at the moment.

You experienced rudeness and inconsiderate behaviour. I didn't, fortunately, but the constant tannoy announcements to be quick made me feel edgy and I ended up buying a few things I didn't want because I accidentally touched them, such as when I darted aside as someone came too close and knocked a taco kit off the shelf then felt I had to buy it. I don't like them and neither do my dc. I fully agree with the measures, btw, but it's certainly stressful.

Then the cashier asked what whether I was working and when I said I was a teacher working from home she positively snorted and stopped making conversation.

I'm not looking forward to going back. I hope you're ok and have support you can access, if only online or by phone. The lonely and isolated are going to be really struggling in this situation.

Oh wait sorry, worded that wrong. I meant they need to realise that they shouldn’t be too close

I get you!

We had someone film me and my children on a walk. In the middle of the forest. At the time when we could still go to the forest.

There so many people. As seen that don’t think the rules apply to them. I feel you op. If I in close to you I will offer to help you!

If you can I would find your voice and say would you rather I left my child at home alone?! Stupid person. The staff member should of known better really but maybe just a slip up in a busy day

You are right of course, but I have to say I'm finding it quite hard to adapt. Mainly because at work, 12.5 hours per day, there is no such thing as social distancing (elderly care ward in a hospital). We all stand close together, work close together, give personal care to patients the same as we have always done. Therefore when I go somewhere else (well only a supermarket at the moment), I do have to keep constantly reminding myself of how far away from others I need to be!

So, for me, I'd think that's probably a staff member who is just doing her job as she has always done and momentarily forgetting how things have changed. I wouldn't take it personally or see her as being deliberately negligent.

I think supermarket workers doing thier best. It's hard to be 2meters away from thier colleague's at all times so maybe they desensitized to it. I work in a care home and no way are we ever 2metets apart.so l guess if one gets it we all do.

Oh, and the comment about the child is pure out & out ignorance. My friend experienced the same and she too is a single mother. What else is she supposed to do?

My local supermarket seems determined to make a trip there as unpleasant an experience as possible, perhaps to deter people from going.

The last time I went, over a week ago, a member of staff leaned around me to put something back on the shelf, she was so close that I could smell her breath.

We've used the corner shop since then. Much nicer, if a little more expensive.

So sorry - most people are on edge and supermarket staff on the high end of being on edge.

DH is an essential worker, and had just completed a 12 hour shift, and as we decided that he would be the designated shopper, he does all the shopping. He was shouted at by a Tesco worker, for simply being there. She shouted at him that he was supposed to be in lockdown and how was he allowed out.

He didn't respond, and thought it best to just shrug it off.

So many of my friends are changing to locally delivered groceries for lots of reasons, including rude staff.

No yanbu-theyre unfirtunately being bit complacent i saw an online shopper last week roll his eyes when someone said can u not stand next to me pelase-didnt seem bothered

also ignore the twatthat made comment about you bringing your son

@Hoggleludo when I was with my 4 year old child on a walk, he quickly ran to a outdoor gym which couldn't be locked and as I ran over to get him off one of the things, I saw a body builder type guy pointing his phone at my child obviously trying to film. I glared at him and said you'll loose that if you dare film my child...I'm tiny but I must of looked scary because he did. People are just ridiculous

DH is an essential worker, and had just completed a 12 hour shift, and as we decided that he would be the designated shopper, he does all the shopping. He was shouted at by a Tesco worker, for simply being there. She shouted at him that he was supposed to be in lockdown and how was he allowed out.

I don't understand this. If she thinks everyone is in lockdown, why does she think she is at work??

You are not wrong. As I was waiting in the queue a man came up behind me and started dithering around. I told him "two meters please" and he began to get arsey with me. It transpired he was the son of a man in front of me and had just come in a small shop to join his father and didn't buy anything at all.

@Hammering - well, exactly.

The supermarket workers are probably trying.

It's hard to remember all the time, standing closer to people is ingrained in us and whilst on a short shopping trip you can keep it in the forefront of your mind, if you are working all day every day it's likely you will slip up.

They have asked us to not bring children shopping. I understand why you need to, but just as you felt frustrated by people 'not following the rules' others probably felt frustrated by you.

A month or so ago everyone was all 'be kind' and I found it all a bit nauseating, now I'm thinking why can't we all just be a bit kinder to each other!

It's a strange time. I think everyone is feeling frustrated by the restrictions but instead of just admitting that they take out their anger and frustration on people who aren't following the rules.

I’m bracing myself for a shitty experience tomorrow op so I feel your pain. I’ve got to go shopping for a family of four, my elderly parents and my brother in law who has cancer. Can you imagine how loaded my trolley will be? I’m sure I’ll get lynched! If someone makes a snippy comment I think I will burst into tears as well. I find shopping such a horrible experience now that I don’t want to make three separate journeys so I can get it all done. It’s Hobson choice.