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AIBU?

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Original poster

A local shop is refusing entry to single parents

619 replies

Throwaway667 · 28/03/2020 09:58

I feel completely enraged by this. With delivery and collection slots now going to the vulnerable (as they should) it’s becoming more difficult to buy essential shopping as it is.
To remove access to essential goods based on the person having a dependant they can’t leave at home is upsetting imo.
Surely this is discrimination?

OP posts:
SeperatedSwans · 29/03/2020 11:32

folk 🙄 oh do fuck off, yet more contempt and stereotyping of lone parents.

Do you think we just though ah fuck it a baby whilst married and a mortgage home sounds great and then I'm going to fuck it all up so I can be on my own, vunerable and low income....

Behave. Just shut up.

JuanSheetIsPlenty · 29/03/2020 12:39

it looks like a lot of folk have woken up to the fact that having children is quite a commitment and responsibility

Which commitment and responsibilities are those? The responsibility of feeding them? I think that’s one all parents were already aware of. It’s why they need to go to the shop in the first place. Do you mean the responsibility of supervising them so they don’t burn the house down? Again, they were all aware of that, that’s why they need to bring them to the supermarket.

I don’t think you understand what you’re actually trying to say. Not well enough to say it anyway. Have a wee sit down, count to 10 and try again. With logic.

Kokeshi123 · 29/03/2020 13:40

This reply has been deleted

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Scarletoharaseyebrows · 29/03/2020 17:36

Distinct lack of empathy round here today.

Sashawest50 · 29/03/2020 17:40

Isadora2007..I'm hoping you didn't think before replying..really leave a 4 year old in the car alone while do a quick shop..shame on you..I would maybe leave my 16 year old in the car looking after the younger one but only because of what's going on..these are the people who leave dogs in cars in red hot summers I hope you haven't a car or a 4 year old

Lookabee · 29/03/2020 17:44

The lack of empathy on this thread is astounding, especially given all the be kind posts a few weeks ago.

Sashawest50 · 29/03/2020 17:44

My husband is a manager at Tesco ..I'm going to txt him now they have one in one out and select hour for employees NHS emergency services. As he has put aside baby food nappies etc for parents I would find it hard that they stopped single parents..take precautions wash hands children and yours stay away from others and try use contactless cards instead of cash..I will reply as soon as I get a reply from him

Sharp52 · 29/03/2020 17:46

This is definitely discrimination...How dare they....I would put the Shop on FB, Twitter, any local Mums group and when we are back to some Normality boycott the shop with every single Mum around...sorry rant over.

Chiyo666 · 29/03/2020 17:46

I thought you meant that they were requesting a marriage certificate or something

No you didn’t you utter penis.

Shell4429 · 29/03/2020 17:50

No advice I’m afraid apart from what has already been posted. But I didn’t find the title misleading at all, knew it was about children and that single parents are finding it difficult to go shopping.

expatinspain · 29/03/2020 17:52

This is madness. Even in Spain, where the lockdown is much stricter, children are allowed to accompany one parent shopping.

PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock · 29/03/2020 17:58

No you didn’t you utter penis

GrinGrin

Scarriff · 29/03/2020 17:58

I agree. Maybe it is time to reach out. My area now has a network of people offering mutual support. There may be another single parent who might swop with you, or a parent with several children that could absorb yours for an hour or so. Good for your mental health too. Try on line. Or try local church/mosque/gudwara etc. If you haveca social worker, they may know of a useful local link. Who knows, you may end up with friends.

Mshappy1975 · 29/03/2020 18:01

this is outrageous. even without knowing their reasoning for not allowing single parents in this shop, it is discriminative, un-ethical, not to mention going against the human rights of anyone who is a single parent. I agree to a certain degree not to take your kids shopping, but the disgraceful and totally judgemental comment suggesting that all single parents are dirty and irresponsible, as well as their germ-ridden children, is one of the reasons there's so much untrue stigma about single parents... DISGRACEFUL..SHAME ON YOU

elesbells · 29/03/2020 18:01

I would think that they will find a slot for you if you explain. Your title is misleading as they haven’t banned single parents at all..they’ve banned children. Married parents with kids aren’t allowed either so it’s not just single parents.

I get why they are doing it. I went to get supplies for my family and an elderly neighbour a couple of days ago and there were two lots of couples with kids running around the store...the staff did try and ask them to keep their children with them. One couple complied but the other started with the ‘they’re kids what are we supposed to do’ malarkey.

Kids are germ magnets and dependant on age, don’t and can’t understand social distancing.

If you are having problems, there are plenty of ways people can get shopping to you. Wait until we are full lockdown - you’ll have no other option then. This is what we are trying to prevent.

LotsaDo · 29/03/2020 18:02

Who knows, you may end up with friends

God, how patronising!

Popsielady · 29/03/2020 18:05

This is what the local community support groups are for. Did you get a leaflet through your door about neighbours who can collect shopping /prescriptions etc? We have here and there’s also a WhatsApp group. If not, get onto the council as there will be groups set up of volunteers who will collect /do shopping for you.

Sumlove · 29/03/2020 18:06

How ridiculous! To suggest leaving young children in cars and stood outside - supermarket car parks and entrances will become the new paedophile hang out! I have a 9 year old, I'm a sp and when we go to the shops I tell her not to touch anything and keep her distance. And one poster saying they should go to school? A single parent does not equal a vulnerable child! Wow.

lisclick · 29/03/2020 18:12

I think this is unfair as it puts you in a very awkward position. I don’t know where you live but there are voluntary groups that have sprung up to help people in tricky situations. I am part of mutual aid and you can sign up for help at helpme.mutualaid.couk and look them up at www.mutualaid.co.uk - but you should be able to shop for yourself, I would try speaking to shop managers first

PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock · 29/03/2020 18:13

or a parent with several children that could absorb yours for an hour or so.

The fuck?

Rachel1874 · 29/03/2020 18:13

Definitely not being unreasonable!! Yes the shop may be saying no children but in reality that is no single parents because you can't leave them elsewhere. Report them!

sarahjb76 · 29/03/2020 18:14

I'm guessing like others have said that the shop is stopping children entering there store not just single parents? Anyway, I feel for you. Things are not always simply rectified. Your child my or may not have another parent whom they see on a regular basis. However, this is not an option at the moment as we have been told to only be in contact with people in our own households. So, not an option to leave with another parent. Some people don't drive so cant leave in car. Some people dont have close friendships with neighbour's to be able to ask them or they may not be suitable to leave your child/children with for whatever reason. Like I say things aren't always as easy as other people suggest. I would say it's worth a try ringing the stare and explaining your situation and maybe they could let you in first thing in the morning or last thing b4 they close. (Early morning would probably be the best option here) or ask if they could possible drop some bits to you. I think alot of local shops are running delivery schemes so ask them if they do too. It is so hard at the moment for lots of us for lots of different reasons. Personally, it seems at the moment alot of people have forgotten about last months #bekind campaign. I hope you get something sorted soon. Good luck and stay safe. 😁

Shona52 · 29/03/2020 18:16

So what are you meant to do with young children if you have no one able to look after them. Leave them outside!!!

lynney88 · 29/03/2020 18:18

Why is it suddenly ok to leave children unsupervised at home, in a car or outside a busy supermarket?

If a child is old enough to stay home alone it does not automatically make them suitable babysitters to younger siblings.

SPs with children who have no access to another parent can't just leave the kids at home, they cannot ask a neighbour either as we are on LOCKDOWN. Literally means that you are to be within social distance of those who live within the familial household.

Please don't recommend inkine shopping either because there are no slots until late April and most home deliveries are nit being fulfilled and require many substitutions due to idiots over buying!

Not all substitutes are suitable for SNs people.

If we have set hours for key workers, the elderly and vulnerable then surely we can make an hour available for single parents and their kids?

Vynalbob · 29/03/2020 18:20

We would be classed as vulnerable but have not had to register yet as if you keep on the ball (at least in this area) the odd slot does appear.

Alt. Apparently if you go online there are volunteer helpers if necessary. Not sure if anyone else knows specifically where to look?

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