DS had an accident, so my DM came over WIBU

[TheSheepofWallSt]

DS (3) fell down the stairs (all of them), into a table and gashed his eyebrow. Lots of blood, lots of tears / hysterical sobbing and I couldn’t tell how bad it was so called DM who offered to come over.
I didn’t take DS to hospital as he’s asthmatic and wouldn’t want to directly expose him in that way - and 111 said it seemed unnecessary- but I did feel like I needed some support.

We’ve both been WFH for a week (two weeks in my case), and have been observing social distancing and both DS and DM are asthmatic so we’ve been quite careful.

Called 111 and waiting for a callback from a nurse - but DS has perked up in the last hour and is fine. Wound has stopped bleeding and he’s jolly etc. But DM did come. I’m making us all dinner and we’re doing normal family interaction- but I feel horribly guilty.

WIBU to let her come over? I’m a LP if it makes a difference...

It depends, is she a medical professional? Was there any other way of her to help you that was reasonable e.g. FaceTime? Are you alone in the home with your little one?

Anyway, I’m glad he’s perked up. Head injuries like that seem to bleed so much in kids.

Yeah it’s just DS and I. No neighbours.
No she’s not medical, but having her to hold DS and keep him awake while I spoke to 111 was v helpful.

YANBU. I would've done the exact same thing. Be kind to yourself and hope your little one is ok now.

Sorry, your post isn't clear whether she's actually already with you or not?

Yeah she’s here. It’s just now the shock has worn off I’m thinking “ah bugger was that the right call”.

You did what seemed best at the time

It's fine, you poor thing!

Op id have called my parents for help...its done now and i hope little one is feeling brighter and you have stopped shaking!!

The risk to your DM was probably small given you have been careful about social distancing in the meantime.

Compared to idiots having barbecues during lockdown this is not an issue.

Yes everyone needs their mum sometimes and it's scary when our kids do shit like that. She has had a lifetime of bumps and scrapes and experience so definitely the first person to call. It's very tricky dealing with cuts on the head with toddlers as they won't stay still and it bleeds like buggery.

I just... if she hadn’t been here, there was so much blood, rightly or wrongly id probably have called an ambulance- I needed another person to hold the compress etc- and on balance figured my mum is much more unlikely to have come into contact with covid than a paramedic...

Oh I don’t know. This bloody virus!

We’ve both been WFH for a week

Your partner or your mum? I wouldn't have let her come over, but you did what you thought was right.

All these measures are about minimising the risk. It is never going to be zero unless you live up a mountain. What you did maybe increased the risk a teeny bit but so does every trip to the shop etc, And has to be weighed against the harm, mental and possibly physical had he needed seen but you'd decided not to because of the virus.

It was fine.

OP I'd have done exactly the same. Watching a child fall down the stairs is one of the scariest things I've watched as parent, don't beat yourself up and be grateful for the support.

On balance I think it was minimal risk to let her come over and help. Just don't make a habit of it. Glad your son is better and it must have been a shock for both of you.

I'm a lone parent to 3 year old and I would definitely have called my mum too YANBU, glad your son is feeling better

Sometimes you need your mum
Yes it wasn’t ideal but you are both doing your best be kind to yourself.

Thing is we’re normally so self sufficient- possibly too much so. I hate asking for help.

DM is 55, rather than “elderly” so am hoping this wasn’t too risky on balance.
But who knows.

Thanks for being reassuring all.

Totally understandable in the circumstances- just keep her there now!! 🤔
Hope your wee boy is okay now.

I'd have done the same hope you're all ok. Don't stress about it now.

It’s not like you invited her over for a cup of tea and chat. Ideal? No. But hey, shit happens and I wouldn’t worry about it. Many others would have reasonably done the same. I understand why you did, you don’t deserve to be berated for it.
Most important thing is that your little one is ok.

I thought you were going to say she was medically trained.... I wouldn’t have done it. I understand things like this can really shake you up but a visit was not necessary

No I wouldn’t be putting my mum or my child as risk in this way.

I think it's fine. The risk is small and the benefit great.

@Insideout99

It wasn’t “a visit”. I haven’t had any visits, from anyone, for 3 weeks, and have been effectively in isolation with DS for 2.

I made dinner etc as once she was here- well she was here. Risk risked, really.

As for “putting my child at risk” - on balance I felt it was less risky to expose him to DM who has been similarly isolated, than a paramedic, neighbour, walk in clinic, or doctor- one of which I would have needed, because I have one pair of hands.

Sorry if that’s snappy but your tone is unkind.