DS had an accident, so my DM came over WIBU

[TheSheepofWallSt]

DS (3) fell down the stairs (all of them), into a table and gashed his eyebrow. Lots of blood, lots of tears / hysterical sobbing and I couldn’t tell how bad it was so called DM who offered to come over.
I didn’t take DS to hospital as he’s asthmatic and wouldn’t want to directly expose him in that way - and 111 said it seemed unnecessary- but I did feel like I needed some support.

We’ve both been WFH for a week (two weeks in my case), and have been observing social distancing and both DS and DM are asthmatic so we’ve been quite careful.

Called 111 and waiting for a callback from a nurse - but DS has perked up in the last hour and is fine. Wound has stopped bleeding and he’s jolly etc. But DM did come. I’m making us all dinner and we’re doing normal family interaction- but I feel horribly guilty.

WIBU to let her come over? I’m a LP if it makes a difference...

Ignore anyone who says you did the wrong thing. It’s fine, and I’d do the same

I know lots of grandparents the same age as your mother who are currently doing many many hours of wraparound care for young grandchildren while parents of said children do many many hours of work for the NHS.
Don't worry.

I'd be more bothered about calling 111 with a gashed eyebrow!
Ex nurse here and damm sure i would have if my 3yr old had fallen full length of stairs snd banged his head and was bleeding like a stuck pig! You dont take chances with that kind of thing trust me.

Nothing to feel guilty about.

Your mum is nowhere near the age range that needs to socially isolate (I'm only a few years younger and have been going to work all week).

You've been wfh for a couple of weeks and have been practicing social distancing so the risk of you transmitting the virus to her is very low.

If you were my daughter, I'd have been upset if you hadn't called me under those circumstances. We all need our mums sometimes and I'm sure she was glad to come round.

The legislation (which lists more valid reasons for going out than just the four reasons in the PM's address), says you can go out to provide "emergency assistance". You didn't do anything wrong morally or legally.

Yanbu

OP, you did what you thought was right in the situation and that is all that matters.

And for the record, I would've done exactly the same.

Small risk is still a risk. I wouldn’t have done it.

You never take any risks, ever?

I'd be more bothered about calling 111 with a gashed eyebrow!

Heads bleed a lot, with the smallest of cuts, and are vulnerable to any knock. I’d call for medical advice for any head injury.

I am sorry your ds was injured, but it is great that he did not get hurt badlý. My ds fell down a flight of stairs when his gp were watching him, and he was ok, if tgat reassures you at all.

Personally I would not allow anybody in though.

Frankly some of the comments on here are worrying in the extreme. Anyone who thinks calling 111 was an over reaction or that the risk of calling ops mum is greater than the risk of a head injury need to work on their risk assessment skills frankly. Look up complications of falls from heights and head injuries.

Well done op you totally did the right thing. Ignore those that don't have our experience

Bit concerned about 111 telling you to keep him at home nevermind all the stuff with your mum. That’s a significant mechanism of injury for a 3 year old and with a penetrating facial injury too...

Technically you shouldn't have but I think its understandable and probably would have done the same thing.
Glad your little one is ok.

It's your mum.

When scary shit happens, we need our mums and they'd wade through shark infested waters to help us so risking a possible but not overly likely contagion wouldn't be that much of a consideration.

Well, not for my mum who wouldn't lift a finger to help me, but proper, decent normal ones would.

Good plan to move in with her after a few days. It will be a comfort to all three of you.

@QueenOfPain

I know... that said, I also know that they wouldn’t have done much more at a&e than i did.

I know enough to check pupils equal/reactive; I know how responsive he can be expected to be as a baseline, and I can take basic obs (pulse, resp rate), so although the injury freaked me out, I’m quite confident caring for him at home.
Am still awake so I can check on him hourly.

Any hint of a TBI and I’ll whip him into a&e immediately.

Thank you though

I'm your mum's age, plenty of women my age are working in the NHS or in the shops. I would totally have done what you did. You needed help with your ds so you could get him cleaned up and assess the damage as quickly as possible. Your mum was a safer option than a medic and did not take up the time of a paramedic. Sounds like a very sensible weighing up of the possible risks (the risk of getting infected, the risk of your mum getting infected, the risk of you missing a more serious injury),

usually i would say don't blame yourself for your reaction and decisions in a state of shock. Except I think you made a good judgment call here in the current circumstances. There was no perfect solution, both had risks so you assessed which was the lowest risk and went with it clearly and decisively in order to get your son the help he needed.

I'd have rung an ambulance if I was in your situation usually too. And usually A&E probably would have been the right place. Usually they recommend people get checked over or kept in for obs or get some steri-strips or stitches, that kind of thing. An when your in shock you want reassurance. Medical reassurance but also somebody to be there with you. Your mum and phoning 111 did that, the Ambulance got to go elsewhere, you took every step you could to avoid covid 19 transmission, no losers here