AIBU to think people are jealous?

[cherrypieandcheese]

NC for this one!

I work very hard running an online business that has helped a lot of people and gained a lot of traction. I tend to keep it very quiet. I take a very small salary thats not enough to pay bills and I hope one day in the future I can go full time. In the mean time I work part time. I scrape by every month. I try and not tell everyone what I do on the side because I'm a little embarrassed and I find people at my work are put off. If they ask me if I have another job and I tell them briefly about my side hustle, the conversation goes dead, so I change the topic.

Everyone at work seems really friendly and I think people like me. I still feel new, been there just over a year, but get along with everyone. Yet I am still not invited to parties. There are group chats I am not apart of, but people who have started working there in the past three months have been welcomed into. I am the only one. I held my own party and no-one from work came, despite all being invited. Others from outside work came so it wasn't a flop. I am the same age and have a lot on common with these people.

We have all just been put on unpaid leave. Three of my colleagues have posted on Facebook tagging every singe colleague at my workplace on how sad they are that they are no longer working together, except me. Again. Theres no-one I am close enough to ask about it without being worried everyone will find out my concern.

Everything went well in the first two months and only happened when people found out about my side hustle. I don't know if people feel as if we're too different because of my side hustle? I have opened up to a friend who has told me I should be so proud of how many people I have helped, but I am not. I am embarrassed. I feel the side hustle makes people feel as if they have nothing in common with me.

I have received a couple of sly comments about it from people at work. Someone suggesting I am going to leave as soon as my side hustle takes off, so i'm not really loyal to the company, another saying I must not have time for friends and family because I work so hard juggling two jobs and dont have the right priorities Just comments I can ignore in the moment but felt really off. This has happened from 5-6 people.

I really don't think there is anything wrong with my personality. I get involved, I am friendly and outgoing. My friend said my colleagues are jealous. Could this be true? There is nothing to be jealous of because what I do is very lonely, hard work, and I have thought about giving in a million times. Or is there likely another problem with me?

I have never had any problems in any other work place. This is the only job I have had since starting my side hustle and the only one I have trouble integrating. If anyone could shed some light it would be appreciated, thank you.

I can’t believe the amount of people bullying OP because she used a silly phrase. Jesus get a life. As if there’s some people posting song lyrics in here... seriously pathetic

seriously pathetic

😘

Couldn't agree more @Mittens030869

As if there’s some people posting song lyrics in here... seriously pathetic

Completely agree. I'm glad when I disagree with people who turn out to be weird.

This thread has taught me that people hate to be proved wrong, so much so that they will attack those that provide evidence of their wrongness.

Who’s being the ‘mean girl’ now?

Luckily I’d much rather be a ‘weirdo’ than a history-denier.

This Ted Talk on ‘Wilful Blindness’ is brilliant:

www.ted.com/talks/margaret_heffernan_the_dangers_of_willful_blindness?language=en

I was hoping OP would come back and reply.

Why would she after some of the very nasty replies early on? Without doubt she's hidden the thread.

She said that it wasn't a phrase she used herself, and she had no idea that it had nefarious connotations. In which case, she herself was using it in all innocence. There's no particular reason to disbelieve her, she didn't argue about it but just apologised.

The impression I got was that her work colleagues used the term; if that's the case then they probably did use it in a derogatory way.

I agree with you Mittens. I was going to mention nasty replies but decided not to as some of those making nasty replies seem to want to have the last word.

“Side hustle” and “hustle” are entirely separate things. There is no history of the expression “side hustle” being used to refer to criminal or sexual activity.

DuLANGDuLANGDuLANG it’s starting to get creepy how fixated you are with this. Screeching about “wokeness” and claiming that people pointing out that different generations use different slang is “history denial.” Your posts are very odd to read.

Do you ever check you are actually correct before you post something, Swerf? Or do you believe the content of your own head counts as a reference?

I’ve never said that language doesn’t alter over time, I’ve repeatedly said that it can, often through mechanisms such as appropriation. Right now ‘Hustle’ and ‘Side Hustle’ are being used in three different ways, depending on cultural context. Those different uses are not divided by age, as some other slang words or phrases are.

Why are you refusing to accept that this particular phrase has negative connotations to many people? It’s been said repeatedly by many posters in this thread.

Merriam-Webster says ‘side hustle’ has been used to describe both criminal AND legitimate activity since it was coined in the 1950s. I think that’s interesting, and quite surprising.

Maybe trying to have a more in-depth conversation and backing up your assertions with evidence IS a bit odd in the internet age, and spouting made-up bollocks is the norm?

The word 'hustle' is definitely used among younger generations as a positive. I've never heard it used negatively by vloggers on YouTube for instance. Lily Singh is a great example, she uses it all the time in a positive way. I don't understand why people are going crazy over the use of 'side hustle' at all. So strange.

The words 'side hustle' makes you sound about 12, do you have a beau too? Plus the fact you've put this down to the fact you think they may be jealous of you also makes me think you might come across as a bit 'up yourself' but that's just my opinion from your OP.

DuLANGDuLANGDuLANG you sound utterly unhinged. Why are you so fixated on proving the OP is doing something dodgy just because she used slang that your generation isn’t familiar with?

I think it's the way you explain it to other people.

I have my own small business working from home- it earns me a healthy profit, and is my only income.
It has never crossed my mind that people are jealous, although I have been told several times I am "lucky"- which I think is bizarre, I have never worked so hard in my life!
I also have to keep the nature of my business under wraps a little, some family members and visitors to the house would take a very negative view of what I do.

Also dislike the term "side hustle".

*hustle verb (PERSUADE)

to try to persuade someone, especially to buy something, often illegally:
to hustle for business/customers
They made a living hustling stolen goods on the streets.*

dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/hustle

You're making money from helping vulnerable people and ultimately you could make a lot of money through helping vulnerable people

On that information alone I wouldn't trust you

@chatterbugmegastar I have friends who earn a fortune from care homes. Could be something like that?

Ah yes @Thehop - I hadn't thought of that angle. My mum was in a nursing home and the owner was very very rich. It felt wrong that the staff were paid so little in wages and the elderly patients had such high invoices sent to them each month.

So my original point stands. I wouldn't trust you, OP, if your sideline was making Money from the vulnerable elderly

Just my take from experience on this particular point

Yes I work in a private nursery so can completely sympathise with that situation @chatterbugmegastar!!

The term side hustle is used as a positive thing by younger generations (maybe gen z?)
In my circle of friends some of us would use it but not in a totally serious way.

Plenty of people make money from vulnerable people, that's the nature of the world, it doesn't mean it's dodgy... charities, wheelchair manufacturers, medicine, loads of things like this not done for free! In many cases these things wouldn't or couldn't be done if there wasn't money to be made.

Some of the people on this thread are not very nice, I know aibu can be particularly vicious sometimes but whatever happened to #bekind

Not sure why people are taking the piss out of OP

Yes, sex worker for disabled clients is what i thought of, too.

Part timers miss out on stuff usually as so much happens in the full timers week.

Doesnt sound like jealousy whatever your mysterious side hustle 🤮 is, they just dont click with you.

So my original point stands. I wouldn't trust you, OP, if your sideline was making Money from the vulnerable elderly

Much as it would be nice if vulnerable elderly people received absolutely everything for free, they don’t, food, equipment, services like dog walking, gardening, dementia friendships groups, meals on wheels, hairdressers, chiropodists etc all provide services to elderly and can’t Charities charging nothing. They can make relatively little money but can be lifelines. I think blanket statements about not being able to trust someone for working in a sector with vulnerable old people is ridiculous.

It’s just another excuse to bully the OP. Like insinuating she’s a sex worker. Ridiculous.