Or is my friend a selfish twat? (Childcare related)

[Flordelice]

I know I’m being judgey, but I think this is just so not OK.

Friend A works at a school, in an admin role. Currently working from home.

I just found out that A is sending their three young children to nursery full time still because they’re “technically a key worker”. WTF, they’re at home, the whole point is to keep those places for frontline staff why physically CAN’T be at home to look after kids.

So as not to drip feed: A also shares custody with their (highly irresponsible) ex, so these are not children who are being kept under strict isolation out of nursery. They will be going to and fro between houses and A won’t know exactly who they’ve seen or where they’ve been when with other parent.

I know it’s none of my business but AIBU to be shocked at the selfishness of this?

It’s none of your business.

I don’t think you could efficiently work from home with 3 young kids to look after at the same time?

It's everybody's business when it's contributing to a spread that threatens us all. I would be shocked too OP and would call her on it.

I'm a key worker working from home. I cannot work with a toddler so he's gone to nursery.

I don’t think you could efficiently work from home with 3 young kids to look after at the same time?

Well no, but that is literally what everyone else in the country is having to do.

You cant work anywhere whilst looking after 3 children, that's assuming she is genuinely working from home.

what everyone else in the country is having to do.

Except they don’t have to, do they? They’ve sent their kids to the key workers nursery.

Except they don’t have to, do they? They’ve sent their kids to the key workers nursery.

Key workers yes. And this is school admin we are talking about here.

I'm at home with mine. I work FT. They have schoolwork to do, a lot of which requires my support. I'm managing.

It's hard, but I will not send mine in (can, as DH is keyworker WOH)

Do you not think admin staff are quite crucial to the school currently? I’m getting at least 3 emails a day from my school who are sorting childcare for key workers children.

I think it would be very judgemental to call her a selfish twat.

She’s probably made a very hard decision between feeding her family/keeping a roof over their head or putting them at risk of contracting the virus. There is absolutely no government help for those who have to take time off work to care for their kids! It all depends on your employer.

YANBU.

I’m classed as a key worker and could send my kids in.

But their father is here, he’s not working, so I’m not going to. Even though for some reason they’d rather disturb me on a conference call than ask their dad something

DH is actually waiting to hear back from Tesco, if he gets a job there I probably won’t send them in either.

How do you think the school will function without admin staff??!! The 2020/21 budget needs to be finalised, the Governors aren't allowed to forgo their responsibilities. And HTs have 1001 things to do atm and will be needing all the help they've got.
If you think admin staff are just there to smile and buzz you in you are sadly mistaken.

She’s being selfish.

Our council has really specific rules on key worker child care. If the key worker wfh they can’t use child care, if both parents are key workers they have to be on the same shifts or they can’t use childcare the key work has to be critical key work emergency services hospitals and supermarkets.

I work for an organisation which does not employ essential workers, we are all currently working from home AND keeping children at home. It can be done (not easily). I was under the impression that schools were only taking children from essential workers who can’t work from home??

It's all of our business, people are dying FFS. She's being selfish and reckless.

So so so many people using and abusing. Silly really because next phase of lockdown will be worse, I suggest they sort out their child care as matter of urgency now.

She's a selfish twat and you should tell her

I just found out that A is sending their three young children to nursery full time still

Then the nursery isn't following proper government guidelines. Which states if children should stay at home they should do.
Most local authorities are only allowing nurseries to take category 1 key workers.

I'm a key worker working from home. I cannot work with a toddler so he's gone to nursery.

You might think you're a 'key worker' but if you were you wouldn't be working from home.

In this time of Covid-19

This is everyone's business.

we all affect each other.

She's a very selfish and very ignorant twat.

I’m school admin. I have to go into school to help provide childcare for key workers.

The guidelines we were given quite clearly stated that this childcare should only be used if absolutely necessary.

On Monday we were checking emergency contact details for all the children brought to school. One mum gave us her work number (in a pharmacy) and then said or my husband is at home so best just call him! After a little chat with the head it was agreed that in future the child would be at home with its dad NOT risking infection to or from our staff and other children.

OP you are another one who doesn't know if there is more to this than you are aware.

The nursery likely know she is WFH and are obviously happy to have her kids. Probably as like lots of places that care for children under 4 they would go bust if they didn't have any keyworkers children.

Hmm. I’m in two minds here. I’m working as school admin alongside my safeguarding role because the actual admins aren’t able. It’s not something I could do from home with kids and it’s pretty full on right now.

But then I wouldn’t do it from home in any case because I’m not happy with having info on our children (and parents) on my home computer or using internet without a firewall.

(So on reflection, yes her kids should be at school - but so should she)