Would you report this to safeguarding ?

[Floral89x]

I work in a school and have discovered that a year 11 girl is having a relationship with a year 9 boy. I know it happens the other way round. Just a bit concerning as the girl is 16 and the boy is 13 almost 14, even though he looks more like 18. Do you think I should report this to safeguarding just in case ? Thanks

You really can't understand why people are concerned that a teacher doesn't know or understand safeguarding? You really do need to ask for retaining.

You're asking random strangers you know nothing about to make a safeguarding decision for you, rather than following your own training. And what if everyone had given you shit advice? You would have taken that rather than following your school's policy. It's shocking that you can't see how dangerous and unprofessional that is.

My friends daughter. Her boyfriend was a year younger than her. 14 and 15, perfectly fine. Then she had a birthday so she was16 and he was still 14. Mum had the full on conversation with her about how that at 16 a physical relationship was now legal for her but the boyfriend was still classed as a child and as the 16 year old it was up to her to make sure nothing happened. And if it did that it would be a criminal offence.

I work in Safeguarding.
If a member of my team posted on a public message forum asking what to do, instead of speaking to me as her safeguarding lead, I would be very concerned both about her competency and her ability to make rational decisions.

Report it. Better to be safe than sorry. If the 13 year old was a girl you’d know the answer.

A 16 year old and a 14 year old in a relationship?!
Good luck trying to tell them what to do or interfere.
Were you never mid teens yourself?

iamKahleesi
Ditto.
REPORT
No harm done by reporting, but untold harm done by turning a blind eye.
“ just in case” often saves children.

If my thirteen year old teenager was going out with a sixteen year old I'd want to know about it.

I’m a DSL.

Email them over the weekend/log on cpoms or my concern.

Please see a DSL about anything, even when you aren’t sure

I'd report to the school to let them follow their own safeguarding procedures

Thanks for the helpful replies, I shall be reporting it Monday.
Also to those harsh posters, i am neither incompetent nor unprofessional but thanks, sorry I guess you have been perfect at everything you have ever done, ever. Give me a break.

You are extremely unprofessional as I'm sure your safeguarding lead will confirm when you tell her you asked what to do on mumnet first.

Your insistence that you've done nothing wrong is the only reason I posted more than one tbh. Why not just own your mistake? It's the fact you can't comprehend that you've done something wrong that's so worrying.

I didn't say I hadn't made any mistake, i'm asking a question ffs. "extremely worrying" get a grip seriously.

You're in a position where safeguarding is paramount, and rather than follow procedure you've asked on a message board and based your decision on that. If no one had pulled you up on it you would have made your decision from it.

And you still don't understand how that's extremely worrying? I hope to god my child doesn't end up at your school.

See you later. You have been reported. Ciao

Have you gone mad? I honestly cannot see why anyone would report teenagers for dating ... genuinely

Reported for what .. dear me

Back in the day, before 2003, we all did it.

But now, "Sexual Activity with a Child" is a criminal offence. This need not involve intercourse or any form of penetration. The definition of 'sexual activity' is circular.

She might not need to be clapped in irons, but a word or two of counselling would not go amiss.

Dotty:

"Recent level 3 safeguarding children training. We were told it would be very unusual to take any action around teenagers in a relationship with around a two year and gap."

Is that the latest guidelines?

I have a 13 year old DS in year 9 and I'd want to know if he was seeing a 16 year old! DS looks about 12, not 18, but even if the boy is physically developed he is still only 13 mentally. As it's more than a two year age gap then I would certainly report it.

But quix .... it’s not teachers’ responsibility to watch out for who dates who .... for the whole history of time, pupils have dated pupils from other year groups ....

A parent can hardly know what is going on at school. If a teacher knows of students dating with a large (over two year) age gap then I would expect them to make a report to social services. There's a big difference between two students a year or two apart in school with a year or so age gap (this was my parents, my father the younger teen), and an age gap of over two years.

To me I don’t see the issue.

I am so glad I don't live in the UK anymore. Have you all gone mad? Two teenagers in love...by the sound of it half the people here would like to imprison her or at least forbid them from seeing one another. Absolutely ridiculous!