To expect my white dd not to be an ethnic minority in her own country

[squatchette]

First of all i would like to make it clear that i am in no way racist.My childrens father is half asian (although he is also an irish catholic too).
Anyway today i was late dropping DD2 at pre school and i got to see her whole class for the first time.This is when i was shocked to realise that she is the only white child in her class.
I think i was shocked as we don't live in a particularly ethnic area or so i thought.I read in the schools ofsted report that 40 % of the kids in the school speak English as a second language.
At first i thought it would be good that she can mix with children of different races and i am all for a diverse society.However something about the fact that she is the minority has worried me.AIBU?

"Im interested to know and you havent answered how about when people come to this Country and make no attempt to speak the language or intergrate etc, etc, does that get your goat too?"

No - because I've NEVER seen it in the UK - and we've lived in some pretty "diverse" towns. Yes I've seen groups of foreigners talking in foreign languages to each other - but I don't think that's odd.

"
You sound very anti - British, which is just as bad as being 'racist' is it not????????"

Not in the sligntest - if I was then my children (who have 2 cultures to learn about by virtue of me having married.....and "imported" a foreigner) would NOT be proudly wearing English Rugby Shirts during this world cup, and we could not have been flying a St. Georges Flag outside our house during the Football World Cup.... Actually I lie I'm NOT British - I'm English and proud of it

What I DO dislike is the problem some "British" people (who ironically often don't like the monarchy, are not superstitous, and think Morris dancers are completely naff and take foreign holidays as "there's nothing to do/see in the UK......) have with immigrants in the UK.

Tne DullWitch - what is "not" British in learning about slavery - it IS part of the British history.

"But it isn't actually, people don t really mix, they may be civil and respectful and kind but rarely more."

WHAT are we still living in the 1950's or something??? Of course they mix - for starters why do you think there are so many mixed raced children in the country????

Racism - is the theory that human abilities are determined by race or a belief that one race is superior to another.

There are other words you can use other than 'racist'

Dino - yes indeed. And Squatchette's apology and explanations have been v helpful and constructive - i think i should have been less snippy even before she apologised / clarified, though.

Still think there is some racist claptrap spouted by others subsequently through - but there are posters who have challenged it all, and there's no point in deleting it or anything like that.

Queenie - According to some people on here stating no you are Not in the sligntest anti-british is the calling card of a racist!! -

followed by the qualification of how not anti- british you are but in fact diverse they actually are ie im married to a foriegner, etc, etc.

My point being people are ultra sensitive, when people from a different country, race are mentioned, but no one could possible be racist against the British!!!!

I think the accusation of racism is used too freely, though, and it often closes down the debate

because people get defensive (as on a recent thread about the use of one particular word).

I'm glad this thread moved beyond that point despite the xenophobia that has also surfaced here.

An Asian man called me a 'stupid white bitch' a while ago. I just take it with a pinch of salt because i really don't care what he thinks.

Message withdrawn

...and that adds to this thread, how, choc? I have been called a white bitch by a black man before. I am also married to a black man who doesn;t go around racially abusing people (or calling them bitches, for that matter!).

Cod, you've put in a late appearance and I have to say - you haven't added much.

Message withdrawn

oh I meant to add - yes we have some lovely landmarks - but I'm afraid I don't think they're the best in the world.....

It could have been interpritated as being rasist towards me, but because i am British white, it's not conciderer rasist.

ahh but law I've already said I'm NOT proud to be British I'm proud to be English

oh and I don't claim to have white children........and I don't think I could tbh - although I do wish they had something that resembled me as I get rather tired of telling people "yes they really are mine"

Although having said that DS2 can talk for England (ooo is that racist??? and likes a good argument so like me in that respect

and who said that people can't be racist towards the British???

I'm sorry - did you say that if someone called you a "bitch", then that's racist simply by virtue of the fact that they're a different colour from you??

I'm starting to feel like I'm in the farking twilight zone what with two bizarre threads running concurrently...

well, I might as well myself from both then

anyhow this thread is not helping me get sorted to go and get my heffalump weighed and if I want to be back to pick DS1 up from school I have to get going soon (off topic - but annoying the two "well baby clinics" in our town are on the edge of town at opposite sides......very helpful for those of us that live near the middle and do't drive - ooo I know perhaps I can blame it on the immigrants........oooo yes I can it was DH's idea initially to move from our old house - 5 minutes walk from the place where I'm going this afternoon - to this one - 35-45 minutes walk )

Now before I get into trouble (what's new ) I'm off.

Scary thread! Pitchfork waving indeed.

I'd be a bit taken aback if my dd was the only caucasian child in the class but I probably wouldn't say anything. Certainly not on MN, anyway.

my son who is white, attended a school where 90% of children were African for 2 years, although he made lots of friends there, he was never allowed to see them outside of school, they were not allowed to come to his house, parties and he was never invited to their houses, parties etc.

He has moved school and 90% of the children are white in colour and has been welcome by the children and their parents.

Like it or not there is a divide.

Also my son was mugged and stabbed in broad day light, in a busy high street by 15 non white youths and no one stopped it. (they couldnt speak any English, but had bothered to learn the words give me your phone)

A witness told the police he did not intervene because the youths were black, so if they were white would he have intervened!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No, that he called me a stupid white bitch, that could have offended me by being rasist because he was Asian and i am white.

Oh yes - I see - so you did - apologies.

I still think that there's too much tit for tat anecdotal crap on this thread supporting highly questionable views. For instance, pointing to an incident involving non-white violence - oh yes, clearly an indication that all is not well in the "non-white world"

Is it too much to expect that we would see other people as individuals, especially children, and not categorise them by the colour of their skin?

I just wrote a long reply to your 12.45 law - but deleted it as I would probalby have been banned for it .

Firstly - "african" - that's like saying "European", or "South American" - ie there's lots of countries on that continent

secondly - without wanting to make this sound like a personal attack - perhaps the other parents didn't want their children mixing with your DS because of your views on immigrants??? Perhaps they're like me and never quite get around to organising "playdates" outside of school hours (DH is in YR2 and hasn't had a friend come round to play yet out of school ), perhaps the parties "clashed" with other things??

perhaps the parents were scared of how their children would be treated if they were allowed out to play - believe it or not some immigrants are SCARED to try and intergrate because of the abuse they've receieved in the past!

" so if they were white would he have intervened!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - probably not - look at that poor man who was killed by a group of white teenagers when he tried to stop them vandalising his car . Most people I know are too scared to intervene when any group of youths are up to no good

Queenie - you cant say English anymore, its not PC!!!!!!!!

Don't be silly. Of course you can.

QoQ - you are absolutely lovely and thank you for having the time and the stomach to engage with these utter and complete tossers.

Lots of love, Hurly.