How much of these things do you consider a treat?

[LajesticVantrashell]

Person A has done/given/bought her DC the following this weekend. Person B thinks this is excessive and that they're all treats which should be given rarely and sporadically.

1. McDonald's
2. Soft play
3. Swimming
4. A new book
5. A small bag of jelly sweets
6. A magazine

This is in between an afternoon in the park, a walk up a hill and some down time playing at home.

How often do your DCs do/have the above?

1. McDonald's - occasional treat

1. Soft play - not a treat, especially given the weather lately.

1. Swimming - not a treat

1. A new book - i would class this as a treat because I tend to use the library very regularly, so i don't feel the need to buy and keep lots of books

1. A small bag of jelly sweets - weekend treat

1. A magazine - occasional treat. Depends on price as some are quite expensive for what they are. And I hate the plastic toys.

@Ruby8719 depends what you let them eat surely?

A happy meal can contain 3 fish fingers, a bag of apples and grapes and a bottle of milk/water.

I find it hard to believe you think this would affect a child's health. But there you go 🤷🏽‍♀️

You’re person B aren’t you?

A book should never be considered a treat.

Kids often swim weekly. That and softplay are both good exercise so I wouldn’t really consider them a treat.

The others are treats.

My DC is only one so I'm projecting a bit as to how I might feel:

1. McDonald's - I guess the kids probably think it is, I consider it emergency food rather than a treat
2. Soft play - somewhere between "a fun activity" and a treat - I guess if you give the kids a choice on what they do then maybe you could consider it a treat
3. Swimming - see above - mostly just a fun family activity rather than a "treat" per se
4. A new book - kinda yeah, but also books are great and I want my DC to be surrounded by them and enjoy them - but a new one is definitely a treat (for DC or adults!)
5. A small bag of jelly sweets - yes, but also kinda normal so wouldn't want it to be exalted
6. A magazine - yes, think this probably is

Whether the above is excessive or not is down to the individual - for some it will be excessive, for some (probably us if I'm honest) it will just be a "normal" weekend.

@AngelicaKauffman magazines are £5, books are £3 or less and last longer

1. McDonald's - maybe once or twice a year, usually on a journey at a motorway service or something. I wouldn't dress junk food up as a treat, more 'this is open, it has food.'

1. Soft play - every 3 or 4 months I guess.

1. Swimming - weekly if doing lessons, otherwise pretty random. Water park more often.

1. A new book - every week/whenever they want something new/specific to read.

1. A small bag of jelly sweets - pretty random, maybe on a car journey. Not too often I suppose.

1. A magazine - rarely. I tend to discourage the free plastic crap that's often stuck to the front.

I suppose the idea of what is a 'treat' varies from family to family?

I wouldn’t class any of those things as treats exactly, but that’s a lot to do on one weekend. I’d be very pleased with fitting it all in!

None of those are a treat IMO. I strongly disagree with linking food and treats.

1. McDonald's - for my benefit because I hadn't packed food or I just really fancy a McD's
2. Soft play- not a treat for anyone IMO, but would do it for a party/to meet up with friends
3. Swimming - not a treat, something we would do every weekend as well as a swimming lesson
4. A new book - I would pretend to my child is was a huge treat, I wouldn't consider it a treat at all...my 2 younger DC don't like reading and so I can easily justify buying books.
5. A small bag of jelly sweets - a treat. I don't buy my DC sweets, only chocolate.
6. A magazine- a treat, because most kids magazines are crap.

Are you Person A, OP?

When my dc were actually children they wouldn’t have counted any of those things as a treat as they were things ( excluding the Macdonalds) that we did weekly / fortnightly if not more often .

1. McDonald's- treat
2. Soft play- only when attending parties so suppose it's a treat
3. Swimming- not a treat, just an activity
4. A new book - not really a treat
5. A small bag of jelly sweets- not really a treat
6. A magazine - a rare treat in our house

We never go too McDonalds. ever.

Swimming and soft play would not be on the same day, but maybe on 2 days over the weekend.

The rest sounds normal.

Person b needs to stop being jealous and interfering. That sounds like a lovely weekend for a little one!

My DCs are effectively grown up now but.....

1. McDonald's - was/is a couple of times a month
2. Soft play - when mine were small the nearest one was miles away so only really happened if we were on holiday.
3. Swimming - lessons once a week
4. A new book - books to me are not a treat. Books were bought or borrowed from the library on a regular basis. These days we are all on kindle and buy books at least once a week.
5. A small bag of jelly sweets - once a week treat
6. A magazine - don’t think they ever really asked for those...

This is in between an afternoon in the park, a walk up a hill and some down time playing at home.

My DD is the only child so a bit spoiled. She’s not interested in McDonald’s and never was so it’s not a treat.
Soft play was a holiday treat at primary age.

Swimming - not a treat, essential exercise.
New book - regular treat, whenever she needs a new one.
She’s not interested in magazines so won’t consider them as a treat. I would consider them as opportunity for a parent to get some free time so treat for a parent.
Sweets - she often buys something sweet at school canteen, at primary she had a sweet treat at least over weekend.
So I don’t think it was excessive, but could be overwhelming for a child depending on their age. My DD wouldn’t survived all this in such a short period of time, it would be swimming or soft play with her.
I wonder if person A is a nonresidential parent trying to do everything at one weekend or person B is a grandparent who criticises too much.

1. McDonald's treat
2. Soft play treat
3. Swimming if lesson then no, if just for fun and I let them bring friends then definitely treat
4. A new book a new book to keep is a treat, we normally use the library for books
5. A small bag of jelly sweets i give them sweets every Saturday but it’s still a treat
6. A magazine treat

All of these together over the course of one weekend, definitely been treated!

*Mcdonalds and soft play sound like punishment grin

The rest sounds like normal life*

This

The McDonals should be a treat for health reasons.
Everything else seems normal to me

Rarely, as in what? Only one per month, or something?

Swimming is good exercise.
Soft play is too.
Books and magazines are good for reading. Whether you want to buy them or not, depends on your budget. I'd be happy for my child to have them.
A small bag of sweets, maybe not every weekend, but I wouldn't factor them in with the other items.
And McDs depends on what we were doing. Was it a Big Mac with big fries and coke?

Hardly something I'd comment or argue about.

McDonald’s and soft play

I guess McDonalds is a treat if DC asked for it but not if it was just to avoid cooking. It would be Dominos here. The rest is a perfectly normal weekend.

Going back many years, from memory:

McDonalds - fairly often when out shopping, other places too.

We didn't have anything called 'soft play' back then - we might have played 'played softly' but there were no places specifically designed for it.

Swimming occasionally with me during holidays but weekly at school.

A new book - quite often.

Jelly sweets - occasionally, my mum used to buy Rowntrees pastilles for him.

A magazine - can't remember that often but he could certainly have had one if he asked. Many children had comics every week.

Food should never be a 'treat'. McDonalds and sweets both have their place in a healthy balanced diet, although at different intervals for different families. Obviously either being a daily occurrence isn't great.

Reading materials are nice to have and I'd be happy to but them for DCs whenever they wanted them as long as I could afford them.

Swimming and soft play are both pleasant ways to exercise so I say do them whenever you can afford them.

Children don't get spoilt by being allowed to do lots of things and eat food they enjoy. They end up spoilt if they get things because they expect them, demand them and are given them to prevent them from kicking off.

It sounds like a lovely weekend, OP. I really hope you're person A.

All sound like a typical weekend here! Can’t understand the angst over McDonald’s on here at all