To think my friend was incredibly unfair?

[Refreshed]

I look after a friend's 2 primary school DC's when they've finished school, every Monday. They often have swimming lessons so I take them to that, whilst I have a short swim with my DS and then get ready to get them.

They are on a small break from it so we did a fun swim instead. Their mum asked me to take them to Pizza Express for dinner. The one she was thinking of is no longer there so I took them to Pizza Hut style place instead.

My own DS was asleep and wasn't having anything. We got a huge pizza with bottomless drinks for all of us. The kids had an ice cream each. This all came to £16 so a fairly good deal. Loads of pizza was left over so I packed it up for the kids.

When we got to their house I handed over the change (the mum had given me £40 for their food). The receipt for it all was coincidentally in there to.

I've just received a text from friend saying ''Hi, was your drink at the pizza place paid for by you? Just wondered as the money was for [NAME REMOVED] and [NAME REMOVED]. The pizza was obviously huge so not bothered at that being shared! "

In truth I didn't pay for my own drunk, no. It was £2.70. Yet I don't charge if I've ever picked something up for the boys quickly. I don't charge for petrol going to and from their school or swimming.

Was I really being that cheeky or is she rude?

[Edited by MNHQ to remove RL names]

Pizza bitch screwed you over. Go to hell pizza whore.
I can sing this in my head but can't for the life of me remember what it's from! Please help

Its from Friends.

What a cheeky bitch!! I'm way too invested in this thread now I can't wait to see the CF reply!

I am saddened by you begrudging me a £2.70 drink when I save you £150 a month in childcare fees, also I spent xxxx on the film night last week and did not think to ask you for the money.

I was going all the above to be helpful and supportive to you as a good friend. Your pettiness over a drink has soured this permanently

Ah thanks Lorenzo

If I paid you each Monday for looking after my children, taking them to their activity, etc. I'd be happy for you to buy yourself a drink out of the money I gave you to take them for a meal (which I asked you to do).

She needs to wobble her head. For £2.70 she could end up with no bargain childcare (£10 a month - five pounds each..)

Why update OP?

*any!

If you had taken them to Pizza Express like she'd asked them you would have spent a lot more of her money on her kids. You've saved her money by going somewhere cheaper anyway. Do not have her kids again for her!

Wow! She’s no friend. That’s really tight!

I’m with @Cohle.

Everyone saying “Oh I wouldn’t mind” are missing the point. It isn’t up to OP to decide her friend shouldn’t mind. Presumably everyone has their limit to what they think would be an ok amount for someone to spend? If OP had spent £5 of the £40 would that be ok? Or £15, buying herself a different pizza and drink? Against the argument that she is being paid way less than she should be for childcare, surely that would have been ok too? The friend’s limit is 0. That was the agreement. You might not agree with it, but that doesn’t make it ok for OP to decide for her.

If OP is unhappy with the arrangement she agreed to, deciding she deserves to take some of the money sent for the kids isn’t the way to deal with it. A give and take situation only works if both sides have agreed to it.

Yes it would be. Because she is going well above and fucking beyond for this woman.
If OP had left her kids starve and had bought a new handbag. That would've raised my eyebrow.

But no. If OP wanted to done on this CF ££ that is fine.

A give an take situation only works if one isn't a twat and actually gives instead of just taking.

For goodness sake, I can't believe anyone is trying to defend this woman! She might have had a point if the OP had paid for a whole meal out of the money she gave her for her kids' meals, or bought a large glass of wine, but £2.70 for a Diet Coke?? I wouldn't even have thought to check on a friend who was doing me a favour.

An ‘all take and no give’ relationship should never be contemplated at all.

MintyMabel
You’re right. Some people take and don’t give. It is they, who finally discover their norms are not social norms. As is the case here. As for the amount spent, you're applying applying slippery slope logic and catastrophising tbh.

I saw Dorothy Perkins are selling T-shirts that say Be Kind on them. I rolled my eyes. All a bit woke for me and virtue signalling.

I'd not bat an eye at paying for your pizza as well as your drink OP. She's just so ungrateful for everything you've done for her. It'd cost more than £10 a week to pay a childminder to collect 2 kids & take them swimming each weeks.

I bet she's in total shock now and realises that she's lost lot more than £2.70 in the long run.

Wow what a cf! Yep never look after them again

I'm amazed people like this exist. Well done for your response, OP.

The friend’s limit is 0. That was the agreement.

Was it though? Was it explicitly stated that she must not buy herself a drink?

I don't think this can be defended, it's not a courtroom it's about what's decent.

They obviously do exist, as 2 PPs actually agreed with the friend that the OP was cheeky. Astonishing.

I think the point is that even if her friend thought "huh, she used that money for her own drink too - bit cheeky" (which most people agree was not, under these circumstances), to then text the OP that msg when she does so much for the benefit of her children is unbelievably, incredibly, irrefutably, twattish behaviour.

Any updates op?

Hope your friend realises what a fool she’s been.