First date - guy bringing dog

[Macaroni46]

So I've been chatting to a guy online who seems very nice etc and we have arranged to meet for the first time at the weekend.
We are going for lunch at a pub I a village half way between where we both live.
I am aware he is a dog owner and very fond of his dog. Talks about him a lot, sends pictures of him etc.
Through the course of our message exchange it transpires that he is bringing his dog to the first date. I'm not sure how I feel about this?
AIBU in feeling it's odd? Or should I just embrace it? After all, a plump middle aged woman can hardly be too choosy!

@cestcommeca

Though he’s much loved, my large breed dog isn’t allowed upstairs, he sleeps in his crate at night and is allowed on sofas in the day. Stairs aren’t good for his joints and he would take up masses of room on the bed. Plus he’s usually a bit muddy and he sheds, so I don’t want that on my bedsheets.

I wouldn't bother going on the date OP. He sounds like a decent bloke but with your attitude he'll find you high maintenance.

Am always not that keen on dogs in restaurants / near food but appreciate I may well be in the minority in that

I can never understand this, your not planning on eating off the floor so what’s the problem?

I'd be happier to see the dog than the man but then I like (LOVE) dogs. Definitely not the norm though

It wouldn’t bother me if a bloke wanted to bring his dog on a first date. If he mentioned it I would bring mine too. A long walk, pub lunch/dinner.....suits me fine.

My dogs are not allowed to sleep upstairs. If it was just the one I might be swayed. No room for two though, especially as one will settle quickly and the other one likes to move, frequently.

I guess a second date depends on if his dog likes you. Scary stuff 😂

I can never understand this, your not planning on eating off the floor so what’s the problem

The smell? Dogs smell. Just reading this thread I can smell it in my nostrils.

And they don't sit still, they go round wanting attention from diners.

If you are the type who thinks dogs shouldn't be in a country pub, then dating a dog owner who likes a walk is probably not a move destined to have great success

Precisely.

I took my dog sometimes, partly because I wanted to check that they liked him!

The smell? Dogs smell. Just reading this thread I can smell it in my nostrils.And they don't sit still, they go round wanting attention from diners

You must be very unlucky in the dogs you meet then. I often visit country pubs and I haven’t noticed any doggie smell nor do the dogs inside wander around. They stay with their owners, usually under the table.

In this case, there’ll be other dogs in the pub presumably so the OP will have to deal with them.

Took mine on second date
The fact that a new partner was a dog lover was a deal breaker for me
We're married now

Sorry OP, but you this response does sound rather like you're over thinking things to me too. It's only a dog! Why the big deal about him having to clear it with you? I'm assuming he's not going to dump the dog in your lap or force you to walk it / feed it / talk to it. Won't it just be doing what dogs do, i.e. having a bit of a snooze (until the next walk/meal)?

I honestly don't get it. I would get it if we were talking about meeting one of his children or parents on the first date. Totally fair enough...But if you don't like the dog, just tell him to put him in the car or whatever. Or make your excuses and go. The dog won't notice! Simples.

I think I would be more excited about the opportunity to meet a new dog than a new bloke...

@cologne4711 I feel like you’ve met some very bad dog representatives.

OP, you're definitely not uptight, or high maintenance, or any of these other weird accusations that some evangelical doggy people are calling you. Like I said before, dogs are polarising. It's completely, totally ok not to find dogs adorable. It doesn't make you less kind or nice or attractive. Far from it: people say they need their dogs as "ice-breakers". Frankly I'd rather date a man with better conversational skills and who fancies me enough not to need a distraction. This bloke is such an arch-doggy-lover that he can't even leave his dog at home. Might as well back out now and date one of the other millions of lovely men out there. Read @Zaphodsotherhead 's story a few pages back, it made me shudder. Someone who is affectionate and loving to their dogs does not necessarily correlate with someone who can be affectionate, loving, witty, interesting, confident with a woman.

OP is not a weirdo and the bloke is not odd. They're just incompatible. Pps are quite right in that the man has mentioned his dog and posted pictures of it, thereby telling OP that it is a major part of his life.

If pet ownership is a no no in a partner, then move along. There's no point in pretending that you are ok with dogs - or football, cycling, cosplay etc etc - when you most definitely aren't. And the bloke isn't going to put Rover in a kennel outside in the cold if you visit. He'll likely be ensconsed in the best chair in the sitting room !

If someone told me they were bringing a dog to a first date I'd say 'ooh, how lovely', personally I don't see the issue 🤷‍♀️

This bloke is such an arch-doggy-lover that he can't even leave his dog at home

That's an unreasonable assumption. It could be true, or he might just feel it's a good idea for a first date to meet his dog, given that if they continue dating, dog and date will presumably spend a fair amount of time together.

What @Umberta said. It would definitely put me off; I wouldn’t enjoy this date. Equally, the man wouldn’t be interested in me because I find dogs repellent and he clearly enjoys their company.

Sounds like a nice guy and his dog coming would be great...

That's my dream! Shows he cares too and doesn't want to leave him alone all day, plus gives you something to discuss

I also think @Umberta is right. I don't have a dog but am a dog person - if I found out a date didn't like dogs then I wouldn't go on a second date. Ever.

@cologne4711 rubbish, not all dogs smell. Depends quite a bit on the breed.

Also my dog lies quietly under the table when we take him out.

I don't know why you would assume all dogs are the same. Do you think all children are the same too?

This bloke is such an arch-doggy-lover that he can't even leave his dog at home. Might as well back out now and date one of the other millions of lovely men out there.

What a horrible way to look at it, and rather presumptuous.

It may be he loves to walk the dog, and there's a great walk nearby, so will take the chance to take the dog there.

How awful to look at a man who has a bond with a living animal and see only negative and as if he isn't one of the millions of lovely men out there.

And they don't sit still, they go round wanting attention from diners

In all the years we've had dogs (18 so far) not one of them has ever wandered about begging from tables in country pubs. They lie under the table and wait for the DC to hand them the occasional chip, like all good dogs should.

@womenspeakout
I didn't say he wasnt one of the millions of lovely men. I said find one of the others as you're not compatible. OP has already told him, I'd rather you didn't bring the dog to our date. And says ok I'll bring him and leave him in the car...! So yes, apparently he can't be separated from his dog even for a couple of hours, either because he's very attached emotionally or perhaps the dog has specific needs. Either way bad news if the OP isn't really up for having doggy at dates.