to think my partner is a massive man child?

[cherryontop94]

just as the title says really...some recent examples:

throws controller when looses on fifa

leaves food wrappers out all over the side even though the bin is right next to it

never knows where any of his clothes are. always has to ask me. scurfs all my wardrobe up looking for specific socks and doesnt rearrange after.

sulks when in a bad mood. dd had a bad night of sleeping last night so this morning hes all I hate life, not going to your brothers later hes a prick etc you're going to need to let me sleep this afternoon because I'm getting up with her now (bare in mind I am the one who gets up with her during the night so was exhausted this morning

these are just a few examples.

aibu to find this behaviour really of putting and to be debating if I want to stay or are they petty things that can be overlooked?

I think it's especially since I've had dd just feels like another person to look after

He sounds useless
Any redeeming qualities?

Get rid.

Well yes, doesn’t sound like anyone I’d want to be in a relationship with. Why do you?

throws controller when looses on fifa

😂

Is he 12 years old?

My friends husband is exactly like this. 100 percent the reason why she doesn’t want children anymore :( she’s so worried she’ll just have another person to look after. It’s such a shame and I don’t think he’ll change.

It’s selfish childish and I don’t think they change in my experience. :(

You need to take stock of your life. Decide what YOU want...

Best of luck!

The sulking I would not be ok with. I think we are often too quick to consider that sort of thing immaturity when infact it's more like emotionally stunted. I could deal with the other stuff but I'd not stay with a grown adult who sulked.

Lost me at playing Fifa. Nope.

I was going to ask what his positive sides are but then, on reflection, I don't think I could live with anyone like that. There are small differences that don't matter (we are all annoying in some ways) but personal maturity, views on finances, views on children, career aspirations, personal organisation, general values and general tidiness are broadly the sorts of things where you really want to be looking in the same or similar direction.

What I am trying to say is that there is nothing wrong with him per se if you are both like that. So if you are both happy to live in a pigsty being unable to find your clothes etc and have no issue with that, then it's all good and best of luck. But if only one party is like that and the other prefers a tidy and organised house, it really can be a source of difficulties and a lot of frustration unless either one adjusts and changes or the other learns to accept.

I couldn't live with a man similar to the one you are describing, nor do I think I could learn to accept things like that. Therefore, my solution would be to move on. Only you know what you can accept.

Yep, I left mine when he was like this (and much, much worse) but this was just the start and I wished I had heeded the warning signs.

Put bluntly - he doesn’t care about you or dd.

He doesn’t care that he makes a huge mess.
He doesn’t care that he might break something throwing the controller.
He doesn’t care that He will take family money to replace when he breaks it. He doesn’t care it’s a shit example to your dd. He doesn’t care if it’s scary or makes you jump. He doesn’t care his moods ruin all of your day. He doesn’t care the house is a mess and I bet you tidy it up too.

Be honest op, you’re walking on eggshells not to set off his temper aren’t you?

TBHJ I read the title only and thought "Yes, he probably is."
SO many of them are.

Just end it. Even if you can cope with his pitiful behaviour, surely you want more for your daughter than growing up thinking this sort of thing is okay and ending up with a useless lazy selfish man.

thanks for honest responses - sometimes when I think about things in my head I think am I overreacting but it's truly exhausting.

Jammydodger1981 - hit the nail on the head. I dont even want him to come out with us to see my brother now as I feel he would ruin it anyway with his moods. likes to twist it back on me aswell. if we cant find said pair of socks as an example "were not going" and throws himself on sofa hand over face ignoring me

Jesus! Your update 😱 How old is he? I couldn’t cope with that. Get rid. He’s dragging you down.

Does he work ?

Yeh, he's done sort of disorderd. I'd be ofskies

*some sort

Even my 12 year old doesn't throw the controller on the floor when he loses a FIFA match!! Although let's face it he could be losing against a child if he's playing online 😂
He sounds like a total PiTA and like a PP said I read your title and thought they all are.

Fuck me he sounds horrific.

Just no!

It sounds like there's something very wrong with him. Horribly selfish at best.

feel a bit trapped because his mum is really on me too, whenever I've threatened to or even disappeared for a few hours she rings everyone who knows me saying how worried she is about my partner that hes going to do something stupid and manages to convince me that its not as bad as I think then gets all his family on board too then I question myself

Yanbu. He sounds like a drama llama teenager.
LTC (leave the child).

I'd rather be in my situation as a single parent. By far.

Basically a manipulative cow. Tbh they both sound lowkey emotionally abusive. Google npd and see if it rings a bell for either of them. I've noticed a lot of covert narcissists seem to have overt narcissist mothers.

On the whole, women as a species would be doing themselves a favour if they stopped having children altogether.

I hear so many of these stories of useless partners and fathers.