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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Inappropriate clothing at a netball tournament - one of the fathers that is!

111 replies

mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 19:41

So, watching a netball tournament this week and to be fair the weather was very windy. One of the fathers turned up wearing very lightweight shorts, so lightweight than when the wind blew, well lets just say I had a really good knowledge of his anatomy.

Now this was a tournament for yr 6 girls. Friends and I were literally crying with laughter and not quite sure where to look.

Lo and behold, at an even bigger tournament the next day and there he was again in the same or identical shorts (it had snowed in the morning in case anyone is wondering I I am in Australia).

So, the games staff from my DC's school felt he was dressed extremely inappropriately and so did I. But would anyone have actually said anything? Is it possible he was just oblivious?

OP posts:
BigFatLiar · 28/02/2020 20:08

Not appropriate.

I hope you have a similar issue with short skirts for women (or men just to be inclusive Grin)

JustInCaseCakeHappens · 28/02/2020 20:08

well, Kate Middleton enjoyed similar floaty outfits for years. Some people like fresh air 🤷

ffswhatnext · 28/02/2020 20:08

I also clearly thought he was flashing.

The outline of his cock could be seen in the wind.
Do we also have to get outraged when we see camel toe?
What about lycra? I mean that leaves very little to the imagination?
Other forms of tight-fitting clothing?
Get offended by swimsuits and swimming briefs

GinnyStrupac · 28/02/2020 20:09

I think it depends what the shorts were made of. Mesh? Probably inappropriate!

MzHz · 28/02/2020 20:10

He knows, I agree. I’d complain to school. It’s exposure to minors

Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:11

Well it would be odd if he was wearing a swimsuit at a netball tournament in 2 degree temperature.

Honestly, I can't explain how clear the outline was - and there were no women there in t shirts with no bras which is the only comparison I can think of.

Again, this was a netball tournament for 10 year old girls. It just felt inappropriate and many people commented who were spectating. But it is interesting that some people feel it is fine and I guess this is what stopped me and the staff from my children's staff actually saying anything.

OP posts:
Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:13

Sorry, the staff from my children's school who didn't officially comment either.

For context I was wearing a full length all weather coat, gloves, hat, scarf and long boots - it was that cold.

OP posts:
ffswhatnext · 28/02/2020 20:14

Yes because if it hadn't have been for the wind, and everyone having a good look, no-one would have noticed.

So was it a good looking one?

whitetoblerone · 28/02/2020 20:15

He must have known! Definitely inappropriate.

It did make me laugh though, but only because I thought of the same Friends episode.

Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:19

He was most definitely not good looking by conventional standards not that I am sure that makes any difference. Honestly, he could have been ummm Tom Cruise in top gun days and I would have thought it inappropriate.

I do appreciate thought that the wind may have caught him out. I hope it was totally unintentional although he is 'known' at his school for his fashion choices.

However, I appreciate that sometimes we go out in the morning thinking we look one way and weather may conspire to make us look another. But how do you say to a virtual stranger, mate I can see the outline of your penis??

OP posts:
AntsDeck · 28/02/2020 20:19

@mrscampbellblackagain you should have asked him if he liked The Wombles, as you can see his Great Uncle Bulge-area GrinGrin

Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:20

I don't think debretts cover that do they?

OP posts:
Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:20

Antsdeck Grin

OP posts:
goodytooshoes · 28/02/2020 20:20

My DH had a pair of shorts like this and even with boxers on underneath you could see EVERYTHING because of the type of fabric. I had to ban him from wearing them outside the house when I noticed it. He's also the type that wears shorts all year round.

There's a possibility he doesn't know yet. My DH was oblivious to it and hugely embarrassed when I pointed it out.

Hopeisnotastrategy · 28/02/2020 20:22

If in doubt in these situations, the solution is always to consider this. (Also in cases of abuse or harassment).

Is there a pattern of behaviour?

A one off - may or may not be dodgy.

A regular pattern - they generally know and it’s deliberate.

Keep notes and pictures if in doubt

Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:23

Goodytooshoes - I am pretty sure he was unaware. As my DH pointed out if he was the type to get excited around young girls it would have been very obvious!

I just think if it were me I would rather someone said something rather than be the subject of gossip! Says me who is gossiping.

OP posts:
Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:24

For context, one of my mates who was watching was also a male and he was the most scathing about the shorts.

OP posts:
GinnyStrupac · 28/02/2020 20:25

There is another parent who wears shorts year-round, including thin lycra cycle shorts. I have learnt to maintain eye contact with him rather than look down when he is wearing them.

Our postie wears shorts year-round too, but his are not shudder-causing.

fascinated · 28/02/2020 20:25

Given the cold weather one has to assume it’s deliberate. And that is disgusting.

Yurona · 28/02/2020 20:26

As inappropriate as a woman wearing tight clothing at a sports event.

Misandei · 28/02/2020 20:26

"well, Kate Middleton enjoyed similar floaty outfits for years."

Did she? regular outfits that showed the whole outline of her genitalia or she had fashion faux pas, once?

SallySun123 · 28/02/2020 20:28

I think you need to buy him a pair of thick larger shorts as a present. Wrap them up with a gift tag that either reads “from the netball parents, to save our blushes” OR “put your dick away mate, this is a family show”.

Herpesfreesince03 · 28/02/2020 20:29

I also thought you meant that the wind was blowing his shorts up and he wasn’t wearing underpants. If the weather was that windy that it was blowing his shorts against his crotch, that’s hardly his fault. Could you still see the ‘outline’ of the wind wasn’t blowing on it? Did you check out all the women in case their camel toe was visible?

Original poster
mrscampbellblackagain · 28/02/2020 20:29

To be clear the adults were not taking part in the sport. It was a tournament and on the second day lasted at least 4 hours. None of the mothers watching were in lycra with nothing on top. It was cold.

All those parents who watch a lot of sports fixtures know what the general attire is. You wear lots of layers!

OP posts:
Cheeryandmerry · 28/02/2020 20:30

We’ve had men at our cycling club turn up in very very revealing Lycra. One chap wore thin white shorts and when he bent over you could see a very hairy bum crack. Generally one of the chaps will have a word about the decency of their apparel!

I’ve now got that episode of Alan Partridge - “you’ve popped out again Alan - stuck in my head.