Parents bought me a house to rent and I hate it

[jamjarlife]

Fully prepared to get flamed here, NC for obv reasons.

I have 1 dc and I am married, I have rented my whole life and every year we struggle with rent increases, landlords deciding to sell and having to move etc. My parents have just retired and are fairly well off. They offered to buy a house in my city for me to rent from them. I didn't even know they'd started looking when they presented me with a house to view about 15 miles from where I was currently. I viewed it and liked it, area seemed fine and parents had done their research and decided it was a good area to invest in, good schools for dc etc. They proceeded. They spent 3 months re-decorating and sorting the house out and we moved in just after Christmas.

I hate it. I hate the area, I hate the traffic, I hate the (look) of the school my child would most likely go to, I just hate the whole feel of the place.

What do I do? I know its only been 2 months so perhaps I need to give it a better chance but honestly I miss where we used to live. AIBU?

OP stop feeling guilty. they are charging you market rent. its a business not a gift. you have to speak to them. your post saying how much rent you pay turns this 180 degrees. They bought a safe bet on a new estate. they are renting to a safe bet - you. You wont trash the house, stop mowing the lawn, chip the paintwork, default on the rent. This is nil risk renting for them - in fact even less than nil risk if that is possible. Set yourself a definite time limit. if you still hate it then move. but in fairness to them you must have a conversation now about the level of rent. its outrageous for them to say they bought you a house that they then charge you rent (pure profit to them and a higher percentage than they would get by sticking the money in a savings account) .

Do your parents know that it's actually costing you more to live in this house than your last private rental? If not, might it be worth having that conversation, and seeing if the rent can be reduced so that you have chance to build up some savings yourself?

YABU to move out after only 2 months, especially at this time of year. It takes time to settle in to a new area. I would suggest giving it at least a year, if you can afford to do so. You don't really know the place yet, try and get involved in the local community in some way and get to know a few people. Even if you still want to move next year, at least then your parents will know that you gave it a good try!

Also, have a look around the school before you write it off, it's the staff and children that make a school, not the buildings.

That said, don't feel beholden to your parents, if you've given the place a good try and you're unhappy, then move. They have bought an investment property (not in your preferred area) and are charging market rent, so they're not actually doing you a favour here.

Did they choose the area because it's closer to them?
Are you an only child?
Have the done the same for your siblings if you have any?

I'm sitting with my mum and asked her if she would do this and she said no, it seems very controlling of them to have done it this way.

What are you actually gaining from living there?

I'd feel guilty and ungrateful if they'd actually given you the house or were charging more of a symbolic rent, but since that's not the case, there's no need for guilt. Particularly since they didn't "let" you choose the location.

I'd probably give it a little more time, but I wouldn't feel locked in permanently. There's security in having your parents as landlords, but it also comes with the potential of frustration if a problem arises with the house and you don't agree on how to handle it fairly.

Toddlerteaplease

"Presumably the parents don't want to be landlords to anyone but their daughter. I'd be absolutely furious if I was them."

If they didn't want to be landlords they should have gifted their daughter a deposit and not bought a house themselves. No-one promises they will always stay put when they move into a house - even when people buy they can choose to move. 6 months is the usual initial tenancy term.

I'm gobsmacked that your parents are charging £850 on a mortgage free house. Why are they not just covering their costs? or even perhaps calculating what they are losing compared to keeping their money in the bank (which would be more like 1 or 2%).

I assume that they are quite well off due to their age and being able to but a house mortgage free - so why add £850 (before expenses and tax of course) to their pot when you are at a much more difficult time and will miss the £850 much more than they will benefit from it.

They are not doing you any favours and I would move if you want to. They can rent out or sell - up to them. Don't ask them to buy somewhere else though. What would be the point. If I was you I would be asking myself how cheaply can I rent somewhere (anywhere) to get my 5% deposit together and buy.

Go and have a look round the school

In fairness, it seems that your parents did not buy an investment property per se, but bought you a home; is that correct? So they would not have bought this property or any other property otherwise? That should be cleared up for those who seem to think your parents did this for their own benefit rather than for their daughter and grandchild(ren).

But I'm confused about something else. First you say: "They also promised to charge us much less rent than we were currently paying (we were paying 900, in the early days they suggested paying around 700) but after costs and mortgage went through they decided it needed to be £850 a month." Then you contradict yourself in a later comment: "As far as I know, there isn't a mortgage - they bought it outright."

Is there a mortgage or no? And if there is no mortgage, then your parents paid for the house and "re-decorating" out of pocket? And by "re-decorating", do you mean cosmetic improvements to make the house look pretty? Or do you mean repairs and maintenance to make the house livable?

As for your... ahem... dilemma, given the totality of circumstances including home stability for your family can you do better without help from your parents? If so, then do it. Let your parents sell the home, recoup their expenses, and invest their resources accordingly for their retirement years. If not, then bloom where you're planted and cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Especially for your parents' generosity and concern. As much for your own benefit and happiness as for theirs.

They don't seem to have considered you much. When my son and his wife split up she couldn't find anywhere suitable to rent. We bought a house for her and GC to live in. She went house hunting with us, she rejected my favourite house so we bought the next best in my opinion but her favourite. We put down a big deposit, she paid us some rent but less than the mortgage let alone the income we'd have had from interest on the money we put down. I wouldn't have dreamt of not letting her have a say in it. Even more so if it was my DD I would imagine.

An idea to float to your parents if this did move forward is if they allowed you to choose a house and they lend you the money they can have a charge put on the house (just like a mortgage lender) and you pay them each month to buy it. e.g. you might pay £800 but it is not rent you have bought £800 of the house. You pay off the house and then own it and they them remove the charge against it. Good luck getting them to start again though!

The charge protect their interests as no one could buy or sell the house without the charge being removed (paid off) and your parents getting their money back.

If they charged interest that would be income and need to be declared for tax as far as I know.

They help you but a house but do get an income and eventually their money back. You have to pay monthly but eventually own the house and don't have to pay bank rates of interest or need a deposit.

This potentially is a very awkward situation. If something goes wrong with the house as LL they should uphold their end of the contract and fix things and sort issues quickly. I wonder if they will think that’s up to you to repair. If so, how do they think you can find it seeing as you are paying high rental.

I’d understand a peppercorn rent, but to charge market rate is unfair of them.

Don't understand why they're charging you £850 a month and why you've agreed. They actually sound emotionally manipulative like they've tricked you into this. I mean who buys a house for someone to rent without discussing it with them first? How has your DH reacted?

What would you do if your in laws had done this- said no I expect. It's actually quite mad. Just tell them it's too expensive and you don't like the area, the school isn't right and you're going to have to move.

So your parents chose a house they liked, in an area they wanted, didn't listen to your opinion and are charging you a higher rent than you agreed? And you have added costs and don't like the area? You're not spoilt, you've been bamboozled into providing your parents with a very good tenant they can completely manipulate. Seems to me they're doing rather well out of all this.

So if I were you I'd give it a couple of months, check out the schools and the local area to be absolutely sure of your feelings. Try to negotiate a more reasonable rent on the basis of your added costs. If they don't budge, find another rental back in your preferred neighbourhood.

What are they like generally? Because they're coming across as 'you'll do what we tell you and you'll like it'.

Just wow.

Wish I had a house that was secure!

So your parents chose a house they liked, in an area they wanted, didn't listen to your opinion and are charging you a higher rent than you agreed? And you have added costs and don't like the area? You're not spoilt, you've been bamboozled into providing your parents with a very good tenant they can completely manipulate. Seems to me they're doing rather well out of all this

This.YANBU.

Is this house for you when they die?
I think this could be in best interests if so.
Give it a while.

can you confirm initially they said £700 rent ( which would be a big saving of 200 per month) then you said because of mortgage costs etc it needed to be £850 but then you said they brought it outright with no mortgage if so the costs would not have gone from 700 to 850 as the monthly cost to them would be close to zero apart from tax on rental income if you pay 850 a month rent the maximum for tax is 40% so they would still have £510 after tax
also your OP did say you liked area and schools then you said you didn't
OK it is difficult to know how much traffic there is in advance
the look of the school doesn't matter just how well they teach and look after the needs of the kids pastoral care etc

Bloody hell OP. Just move, they are making a massive profit while you live somewhere that isn't suitable for you. No need to feel guilty when they bought a house as a business investment and not a home for you. If they had wanted a home you would have been involved in the planning.

A Real life friend was in a similar situation
(PiLs bought house and charged them market rent)
it was pure and utter stress and in the end broker her marriage

Help is providing a deposit
what the OPs parents have done is profiteer (and pay double tax on their pension lump sum silly sods)

Only skin read but whilst it seems they have tried to be fair op, they have also suited themselves and how convenient to have guaranted rent from you.

It's up to you what you value more, your dp as landlord or moving again and risking general renting upheaval.

I presume they’d charge you half the going rent or something, or at least a third off. That’d be an offer worth making! What they “offered” wasn’t really much of an “offer” by the sounds of it.

Sounds like what they really meant was “we are buying an investment property in the city and you can have first refusal as a tenant if you like”.

The amount of rent you're paying does make a difference; and new build areas can be a bit...empty. Give it 6 months, warn your parents that its not working out as you expected, and agree how much notice they'll want of you moving. Then see.

If you're paying just about market rent and you aren't actually better off financially that puts a different spin on it. I'd have assumed that your parents were giving you a peppercorn rate. I'd still give it a good go to try and learn to like the area. But I wouldn't feel obligated after a 1 year 'try'. Especially if you aren't getting any advantage and/or they might raise the rent.

My parents at one point were going to do similar for DH and I but we would have been paying around 25% of the going rate so we could save for a down payment to buy on our own. Just enough for taxes, insurance, and a 'yard man'. It was a 2 house property and they would have charged full rent for the other house which would have paid the mortgage amount & other costs. The upside for us besides the reduced rent was that the agreement was that our rent would only go up if the taxes etc went up. They ended up not doing it because DH got a job in another area and they decided they didn't want the headache of being a landlord without us 'on site' to keep an eye on things.

What’s your DH’s perspective? Can’t imagine mine going along with a house move just so we can pay the same amount of rent - to my parents on a mortgage-free property.

Actually Wheresthebeach has given the solution .....

Request a significant rent reduction
contingent on you putting that reduction towards a deposit to buy your own place

If they say no, move out.