Stupid adverts- I'll start...

[BitOfFun]

That Alexa one where the mother lets her teenage daughter repeatedly thump a football against the wall, lit by the thousand suns of her security lamps at 04.40 in the dead of night.

The neighbours must be getting up a petition.

I don't think I am being unreasonable. Which adverts grind your gears?

The new Asda one which takes ages to actually say what it's advertising . Hate it

”I'm not even sure what the advert is for - some tech company - where the little girl is walking to school giving a monologue about the good and bad sides of technology ("it was the best of times, it was the worst of times"), she gets to school and all her classmates are doing exciting, creative things. DH and I always shout at the TV that all that technology can't get her to school on time. Invest in an alarm clock, love!“
I do know those are the first lines from "A Tale Of Two Cities" by Charles Dickens.

The KFC one with the classical music in the background where everybody licks their sodding fingers. They all do it in such an entitled way as if they are the shit. How about I guillotine your bloody fingers so there will be nothing to lick anymore? That ad just gives me the rage.

We Buy Any Car. Offered me absolutely fuck all for my car. I sold it privately for over twice what they were going to give. Looked up all the other cars for sale of the same make, model, spec, age and mileage and put it up for a similar price. Sold it straight away. WBAC are rip off merchants and their ad makes me cross every time I see it.

Most ads make me cross these days. They’re all so bloody pc and woke and patronising.

Beardy weirdly Viagara man dancing round the house in his blue shorty jammies because he's managed to have a shag!

Poor hen-pecked Graham with his nagging wife on Rightmove ad.

Fartlek

The KFC one where a bunch of people lick their lips. Ewwwwww

This!!! I DESPISE it!!!

Can't stand the one for the funeral plan when the woman is playing with her baby then goes 'what's that mum' and the mum goes 'it's for you when I die'. The daughter looks well chuffed.

I saw that biscuit one the other day with some people sat talking about how it feels like Thursday but it's only Tuesday or something. And they're all laughing and eating biscuits and for no reason have these creepy as fuck extra long little fingers. I assume it's advertising biscuits but I don't know because I turn over when it comes on.

I loathe the new OXO mum. She practically goes into anaphylactic shock at the news that both Judo AND a trip to the cinema with Jan have been cancelled. Lynda Bellingham wouldn’t have been fazed by such meaningless shit.

One of the life insurance plan ones where a cheerful 60-something is doing aqua aerobics, a bike ride etc. - anything ‘active’ to show us she’s enjoying life, not worrying about death - who proudly tells her friend the money ‘Can help my family pay for my funeral - or, they can decide how they want to spend it’. I keep expecting her to cheerily add, ‘and they can just chuck my corpse in a fucking skip!’

I agree about KFC. Disgusting! It almost makes me retch watching people licking their fingers. Errrrrggggh.

Disagree about We Buy Any Car - got rid of my old heap for more £££ than I could find anywhere else. Not an employee here! - but it was so easy and pain free. If you sell to a private buyer they know where you live if the car turns out to be a turkey. I shook hands with We Buy Any Car and that was that.

Obviously woke ads where you can see right through them and just thinking how pleased the company is with the ad company who've managed to shoehorn in every single ishoooo even if it's totally irrelevant to the product and you don't even notice what the product actually is.

Totally agree about the Alexa one OP. Anti-social bastards.

And ALL perfume ads. Meaningless and no idea which perfumes they're for.

The Trivago woman looks and sounds so smug and inauthentic, yuk.

The always pad one. They say 'side barriers' like say-bahrers and it ANNOYS ME

Haven't RTFT but why does the dim-witted Oral B woman have a camera INSIDE her fridge when she reaches in for one of her eleventy-billion peppers?

I loathe the ad for something or other baby-related - 'follow-on milk' or some such idiocy? - where the babies stand up and yup, the little girl turns into a future ballet-dancer and the boy has an abacus and becomes a scientist. Way to reinforce those gender roles! FFS!

@sueelleker That's hardly a revelation, it's one of the most famous openings to a book of all time!
The poster isn't slagging off the quote either so not sure what you're post even means.

Unobtainium (great name) OMG YES! the placing of a 'sh' sound at the start of words beginning with S is a creeping nightmare. And people are doing it more and more. I can't bear it.

The ones with baby's talking, had a accident ... but especially the singing 'Take a look at my Face I'm the future'

I thought the giant M&m in bed had disappeared but was at the cinema yesterday and it came on and gave me the rage.

The red head women in wowser ads and the faces she pulls.

It’s not on anymore but there was an ad a few years back for windows. It gave me the utter rage, some old git who looked like he needed a good wash and a haircut, yelling “you buy one, you get one free. I SAID YOU BUY ONE, YOU GET ONE FREE” whilst pushing over all the windows. Yes nothing makes me want to buy a product more than some aggressive man shouting at me.

It’s not on anymore but there was an ad a few years back for windows. It gave me the utter rage, some old git who looked like he needed a good wash and a haircut, yelling “you buy one, you get one free. I SAID YOU BUY ONE, YOU GET ONE FREE” whilst pushing over all the windows. Yes nothing makes me want to buy a product more than some aggressive man shouting at me.

I bloody loved those ads! That's how i want to be advertised to, forget some arty farty slow motion shot of a horse running up a hill with dramatic orchestral music playing, i want someone yelling at the screen BUY MY SHIT, HERE'S MY SHIT, BUY IT!

Someone yesterday said they loved the McDonalds one with girl using rubber glove for swimming hat. Yes I agree. It's really well acted! In the same way as the £1 coin trolley girl.

I love the £1 trolley girl! Her dad's a git though

Haven't read full thread (yet), so might have been mentioned but one of the rightmove ads is absolutely rage inducing for me.
Good-for-nothing Father sits down in messy living room to read. Kids come in; being kids. He doesn't parent, he goes outside to read. Dog needs walking. A storm is coming. (I can only imagine the poor wife will have to wipe the muddy foot and paw prints after)
Bigger house is bought.
Mum is in kitchen with children and unpacking/putting things away. Man doesn't help or engage, yet again. Instead he goes in garden to a shed and builds himself a man cave, checking out from any further parental responsibilities.

Seriously, all I see is the situation from her point of view.

Think the ad needs a follow up that starts where future ex-husband-to-be goes off into garden.
Mum watches him leave from the kitchen looks at the 100 boxes still to unpack and dinner to cook and sighs. Mum goes on rightmove. Gets a house; leaves the bastard. Next scene, mum is in lovely clean house. Kids are lying on carpet playing happily. All is serene.

You can even get rightmove in again by 3rd follow up ad, showing distraught dad putting bigger house up for sale then starts searching for a bachelor pad.

Any TUI advert from past couple years.

That shit Kayak advert

Heather Watson, sod off with your "soft and strong"

@BobbyBlueCat - Yes, as the poster of that particular rant, I was a bit nonplussed by this comment too. I know exactly what the quote is and where it comes from but it's original origin wasn't really relevant to my frustration every time that child wanders in late the school, disrupting the rest of the class