It just shows the level of cluelessness about dementia, when people say that if they developed it, they’d go to Dignitas, or take a stash of pills.
People with most forms of dementia will typically not be aware that there’s anything much wrong with them - because they can never remember that they can’t remember anything - if that makes sense.
It’s much more usually relatives who recognise the first signs and push for a diagnosis - with the sufferer frequently refusing or unwilling to cooperate, because in their heads there’s nothing wrong with them.
My own mother often used to say that she’d ‘take an overdose’ if she ever got dementia (her elder sister had had it) but of course when the dreaded time came....
As for care homes, having looked at a great many over the years when choosing for FiL and my mother, I would say that contrary to popular belief, the most expensive are not necessarily the best, not at all.
I particularly remember one we looked at for my mother - extremely smart and stylish communal spaces - presumably to impress the relatives who were choosing - but the room they were offering - it was a converted hotel - was down a maze of narrow corridors, a tiny room with the original avocado bathroom, not that the colour would have put me off if the rest had been suitable. But it was totally unsuitable for someone at her stage of dementia and yet they’d have been perfectly willing to take her.
The place was owned/run by a consortium of doctors and to be frank it stank of cash registers ringing. It was one of the most expensive we looked at.
We saw others - cheaper - that were maybe a bit shabby round the edges, but with a warm and cosy atmosphere, and cheerful, friendly staff. Far more important than stylish decor, certainly when dementia is involved.
In the end we chose a purpose-built, dementia-only Abbeyfield home for my mother, at least partly because it was very close to me. It was by no means the most expensive, but was a very happy and well-run home and my mother was very well cared for for several years.
I would guess that probably around half the residents were not self funded, but they received exactly the same care, and there was no difference in the type of room they were given. Yes, people like my mother were subsidising the others, but we had no problem with that.