Discussing suicide

[ICriedARiverOverYou]

Not AIBU, just not sure where to put this. As it appears to be so topical this weekend, can I ask that you think about language when discussing suicide.

Committed suggests crime and completed suggests success. Please don't use 'killed themselves'.

As someone who has been bereaved by suicide, the preferred term is 'died by suicide'.

tel:116-123 (Samaritans) for anyone who is struggling.

A similar example I use is when my friend told me they lost their dog. I had no idea whether he'd gone missing or had died confused

I recall a sad moment in a similar vein, when I was doing my training on the wards. A lovely elderly couple had come in, him with a sadly fatal stroke, her with dementia. In the aftermath of him passing away, we noticed that his wife had 'disappeared'. Ran all over the hospital trying to find her, of course it wasn't something we wanted to leave to the grieving family still present. Thankfully she was found well, but obliviously confused, and I'll never forget the look in her eyes when she told me that she had been told that they'd 'lost' Ted, so she was looking for him, to bring him home. It taught me a very valuable lesson about using euphemistic terminology, and the potential for misunderstanding and distress.

I dislike euphemisms intensely. Whilst 'commit' is understandably problematic I don't understand why 'killed themselves' is unacceptable. I always say my husband died. He didn't pass away or pass on (shudder) and I certainly did not lose him. That would suggest carelessness on my part.

I use took his own life when talking about my dad

I use took their own life to refer to a few of my family members

A close relative took his own life as a consequence of severe longterm depression.

To me it's no different than "died of heart failure after a long illness"

The depression killed him. He was its instrument in the end