To ask DD to come home from Uni because of Coronavirus

[MeghanTheeFrenchie]

Hi all, NM for this
I have a daughter at Sussex Uni and I am finding myself very anxious about the situation. On monday DD was emailed by the Uni that two students were being tested for Coronavirus, DD told me one of her flatmates saw a student being taken away by men in Hazmat Suits.

This along with the other cases in Brighton and the south coast is making me sick with worry. Aibu to ask her to come home.

Also I know its not a very lethal virus but DD is Asthmatic and so its obviously more of a worry.

are you generally a very anxious person?

YABU Surely she's at higher risk for complications from the flu which statistically she's far more likely to catch.

I know it’s worrying because it’s all over the news just now, but the risk of catching coronvirus is really very small, and even in that very small chance of catching it, the chances of it doing lasting damage are very small again. My advice would be, and I’m sorry if this sounds glib, switch off the news and try to avoid any mention of it. It’s flavour of the month just now, that’s all.

Why would she be less at risk at home? . Try to get on top of this, it would be a ridiculous thing to do.

OP I’m asthmatic so I get the worry

But I still use the Tube every day because I have to.

The way I see it, this virus only makes a difference in that I know about it. On any given day, I’m always more at risk of getting really ill than someone in better health.

So it’s up to her really, I wouldn’t put pressure on her.

YABU

It’s up to her really but I can understand you wanting her to leave

I guess at least at home she is less likely to be in lecture halls with hundreds of people so statistically safer.

I’ve got one at Uni as well, so I do understand how you feel, but really; you cannot do this.

YABU OP, it's so unfair on your child to expect them to run their own life round your anxieties in this way. Don't say anything.

Oh FFS

I guess at least at home she is less likely to be in lecture halls with hundreds of people so statistically safer.

But she'd have to quarantine herself - popping to the shops or the gym, using public transport would be the same risk. Please don't ask her to come home.

Has she got Reading Week coming up?

I think you can advise her-best thing to do is lots of hand washing and sit tight

Mental

OP... don't do this to your kid.

OP, my DS is at Sussex as well, and while I'm a bit concerned, I would not ask, nor expect him to come home. Statistically the odds are low that anything awful could happen to him, and I keep telling myself that, but am still worried. I'm sure the uni are monitoring the situation carefully and will do all they need to do to keep students safe.

Don’t. Just don’t.

You need to find a way to manage your anxiety without making your daughter feel bad for not coming home or missing university when she should be there.

At what point would you deem it safe enough for her to go back?

What will she do once home OP?

Avoid public transport? Supermarkets?

You want her to give up her uni course and associated qualification, potentially setting her back years when it comes to a career, damaging her income potential, separating her from her friends and losing her independence... To go live with you because you're worried.

YABVVU.

Seriously? These threads are getting beyond ridiculous....

You are massively overreacting.

Plus she's an adult. You don't get to make decisions about her leaving university.

YABU - the odds are so low - and if it does start to spread in the UK it's not likely to peak until May/June time - are you all just planning on staying in the house for the next six months?!?

The point is once young people start university, the university treats them as adults. Thus, it is your DD’s decision to make, not yours. The institution I am at (not Sussex) is sending out Coronavirus emails and has a dedicated email and phone line for students, so I am sure Sussex has similar. Your DD will be getting up-to-date emails and the university will be in contact with the authorities and so I think the risks will be assessed where she is very regularly.

OP, please don't do this. It's really unlikely that your DD will catch the virus (or be seriously ill if she does). If you make her come home now, when would she go back? If this carries on till Easter she'll miss 7 weeks of lectures (I assume - don't know Sussex uni term dates) which would be very difficult for her to catch up.