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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Small children taking up seats

232 replies

pigdogridesagain · 11/02/2020 08:36

I recently attended my local walk in centre for a minor ailment, waiting time was around 3 hours. It was absolutely packed in there. I noticed that there were quite a few very ill looking adults stood as all the seats were taken. However many of the seats were taken by small children, AIBU to expect parents to put them on their laps so that adults can sit down? Another thing I noticed was people bringing 3 or 4 family members/friends with them, again taking up seats that someone who is obviously poorly could have used, AIBU?

OP posts:
Grumpbum123 · 11/02/2020 08:39

Yanbu
I had a recent visit to ED and had to sit on the floor whilst a whole row was taken up with one person and their entire family, boyfriend, 2 children , Aunty, sister, dad and grandad. And she was very vocal about the fact she was there due to an ingrowing toe nail

SeagullSamba · 11/02/2020 08:41

YANBU and I’ve noticed this at outpatients appointments as well (although more with patients’ partners than small children). The people being seen should have seating priority.

PennyGold · 11/02/2020 08:41

YABU 3 hours with a toddler on your knee is not comfortable for the adult or the child.. and one of them is poorly.

YANBU about the extended family coming along! It drives me insane.. especially when there's two adults, why is one of you not at home looking after the kids who don't need to be there?! I can understand "oh I don't drive" that's fine, they can drop off the person who can't drive and then pick them up after.

KindleAndCake · 11/02/2020 08:42

There should be signs put up saying seats for the ill and injured only. It's really not fair! YANBU

pigdogridesagain · 11/02/2020 08:42

@Grumpbum123 don't get me started on the people complaining about having to wait so long, one of which told everyone who would listen that he had a boil on his hand that needed lancing 🙄🙄

OP posts:
iheartislesofwight · 11/02/2020 08:42

yabu, it's a day out for some people Grin seriously though,when i worked in a&e some people would turn up with several family members AND picnic food, not just a sandwich or two but a full on meal

Loveislandlydia · 11/02/2020 08:43

YANBU. Small children should be on someone’s lap

lunar1 · 11/02/2020 08:44

Extended family need to be sent home. You can't really judge small children on seats unless you knew all the details of why they are there. I sat in A&E for two hours before someone came to collect my children once, my appendix had burst, would you have expected them to sit on my knee??

TechnicalSergeantGarp · 11/02/2020 08:45

I attend lots of appts and it's the extra people that causes a problem. I appreciate some people may need to be accompanied but why so many groups attend is puzzling. They are full of bugs and germs and I wouldn't take a child there unless I absolutely had to.

Little DC are probably best sitting down out of the way.

My friend takes herself and her family off to out of hour for the slightest thing. They wait hours to be seen when a pharmacist would probably be more help.

Taylr1733637 · 11/02/2020 08:49

Yanbu.
I work as a healthcare professional, I call one person in for their exam and about 5 family members all try to follow!! The rooms aren't big enough and It's very off putting having a crowd watching!

At the community hospital nearby I did actually notice a sign saying that the seating was for the patient being treated only. Family/friends were to wait in a different area.

Yeahnah2020 · 11/02/2020 08:49

@iheartislesofwight 🤣🤣 oh yes and let’s not forget the dreadfully ill patients who when you go and see them are happily sitting up in bed eating sandwiches! Always makes me laugh.

Cremebrule · 11/02/2020 08:49

I don’t think you can moan about small children needing a seat. There is no reason why they are less important than you. Being in A&E with a poorly toddler is miserable for everyone. The hangers on though yes, they should be more considerate, especially if they’ve turned it into a family outing.

Elephantonascooter · 11/02/2020 08:51

YABVU about the children. They are just as entitled to a seat as any other person. I'd be greatful they wernt running around the place. If the child and parent are there, lukepyhood is they are unwell. In which case, as a poorly adult, I wouldn't want a small child sat on me for 3 hours.
And as a parent of a poorly toddler, I wouldn't expect them to sit on me if they don't want to. They are entitled to a seat.
It's bloody entitled to expect unwell children to move so YOU can sit down.
I do, however, agree that every man and his dog dont need to come for the trip unless it's an emergency such as no childcare for the other children.

MyOwnSummer · 11/02/2020 08:51

YANBU who the hell brings their entire family for a day out at the hospital?

This was a problem when I was going to a lot of appointments when pregnant, and I saw heavily pregnant women having to stand while the men and the assorted 5,000 relatives sat on the chairs. Grrrrr.

brainstories5678 · 11/02/2020 08:52

No, you're not, particularly on the aspect of people bringing loads of "support" with them who all take up seats.

I have a brain tumour and had radiotherapy at the end of 2019 and am currently having chemo. The hospital I go to is always ridiculously packed as patients are allocated appointments spread across the whole day (don't get me started on how inefficient it is) and whilst I go alone (husband has to look after our baby) it always amazes me that the whole family sometimes turns out for something fairly routine these days like chemo, particularly given you can only actually take one other person into the day unit so these extra people literally sit in a waiting room all day then go home.

The children taking up seats aspect bothers me less because you don't know if the adult with them is well enough to actually have a child on their knee. I've got an almost one year old who wriggles constantly and I'd find it really difficult having him on my knee when I'm on week 1/2 of chemo so I'd try to find him a seat too, but to look at me you'd think I was just a "normal" and fit mum in her early 30s with no reason not to have her baby on her knee. That said if it was week 3-6 then I'd have him on my knee if there were other patients without seats.

x2boys · 11/02/2020 08:54

Well yanbu about extra family members who.does that ?? But I think the seats should be for the ill people where possible regardless of whether it's an ill child or adult ,seriously these places are so crowded and unpleasant with the long waits why would you go unless you absolutely had too.Confused

TabbyMumz · 11/02/2020 09:01

"I can understand "oh I don't drive" that's fine, they can drop off the person who can't drive and then pick them up after."
Depends how far away they live. If they live over half an hour away, that's an hour driving. Aldo the patient might want or need someone with them because they are poorly. I know I've sat with my partner in a and e, and he's sat with me when I needed him.

iheartislesofwight · 11/02/2020 09:02

x2boys a bit of drama to post on fb and other shite, i saw people taking selfies outside the a&e doors and ambulances when i had to visit a few months back with my ds. wtf ?

TabbyMumz · 11/02/2020 09:04

"AND picnic food, not just a sandwich or two but a full on meal"
Totally understand that when you are likely to wait for 7 hours!!!

Clymene · 11/02/2020 09:04

People are incredibly selfish. I had to stand waiting for a scan in the EPU after a missed miscarriage because men were sitting on all the chairs.

pigdogridesagain · 11/02/2020 09:07

@Clymene as an ex midwife this is a big bug bear of mine! I used to ask them to move if I saw it happen in the antenatal clinic waiting room.

OP posts:
AnneElliott · 11/02/2020 09:07

YANBU op. It also drives me mad. One person to accompany if they are really ill but a day out for the family is not on!

But some odd people like to do things as a group. Like food shopping with 2 adults, several kids and a pram Just 1 adult go and the rest stay home!

CherryPavlova · 11/02/2020 09:07

If the adult is unwell the children can sit on the floor. They’re much more able to get up than an older person.
If the child is ill most parents would be holding them anyway.

Twiglets18 · 11/02/2020 09:08

You don't know whether it's the child that's got the app tho and imo they're entitled to a seat if so. However do not get me started on bringing the whole blooming family, I have seen that in AE as well. Absolutely ridiculous behaviour.

pigdogridesagain · 11/02/2020 09:10

I should add, that the majority of these small children were clearly not seriously poorly. Jumping all over the seats, playing on phones etc. There were a couple who literally just sat/lay there obviously ill.

OP posts:
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