Starting to hate motherhood.

[Cantthinkofausernametbh]

Hi everyone. I’m a single young mum, partner left me when I was 4 months pregnant. My ds is now 19 months old and defeats me most days. Will not sleep, sometimes will not go to sleep till five in the morning and then wake up at 8 refuse to take a nap and scream all day long. Tantrums are so bad he makes himself projectile vomit all over himself my carpets etc. He has no interest other than a phone or an iPad. I’ve got him plenty new toys over the Christmas period (mega blocks, ride on toys, wooden blocks, drawing board, hopper, little people play set) not interested in anything else. He cannot do much at all and goes through times where he will forget everything he knows including his name. Could say mama and now can’t. I try so hard to teach him to speak and he just won’t co operate, I sing to him, ask him to say stuff, speak to him lots, engage in playing with him, he has colourful bath toys which I repeat the number letters and colours over and over, I try to repeat myself as much as possible but it’s getting me no where. He gets fed up starts screaming and I give in and give him the iPad. I try to take him out but he refuses to walk and will scream if I take him in the garden where he has toys and chalk. Took him to soft play a few times but he was not at all too interested after about 30 minutes. Please give me some tips and tricks to make things easier for him, I think he screams because he wants to communicate with me but can’t. Been to the gp and they said there’s nothing wrong with him. What’s some ways you teach your little ones to speak? Or to play? Or any fun activities that keep them occupied? Please help

Thankyou so much everyone for your lovely advice, I’ve followed through with it and see a huge difference!

@Cantthinkofausernametbh I am delighted thing's are better, it is a battle daily but one worth fighting.

Sending a cyber high five. Parenting is so so hard. You sound so lovely and you are doing all the right things. It’s great that you have reached out like this, asking for ideas and help. I haven’t read your full thread but I’d also suggest a children’s centre and local homestart for help. With my first son I had a pretty bad experience of the health visitor and that left me really vulnerable and isolated as I felt I didn’t have anyone to turn to for support. I then went to a sure start centre and got chatting to the staff. She helped me to register with a different practice and I got lots of practical support that really helped me. I didn’t realise how huge difference the small things (like a very structured routine) makes. I didn’t know as a first time mum. Keep asking for help and support. You deserve it!!

My toddler was hyperactive and there were some early suggestions of adhd etc. He was so so wired all the time. When I got help to establish a sound routine his behaviour and interaction and development really came on. I felt so silly. I’m an older mum, with a phd and still I got so much of the basic stuff wrong in the early days. We all do, it’s very hard. So my point is, if you don’t get anywhere when you reach out for help (as I didn’t with my first HV) then keep trying.