To refuse this smear test?

[URPS]

Currently in the hospital waiting room. Male doctor comes out to collect the patient before me.

I find this difficult enough. I really don't want a male doctor to do this.

Could / should I refuse ?

Good for you for sticking up for yourself OP! It's your body it is always your choice. Best of luck for March

Well done for knowing your boundaries and sticking up for yourself.

I do wonder why it wasn’t made clear beforehand that you would be seeing a male doctor.

@Tombliwho indeed ! Are people so stupid that they can't comprehend someone being terrified.

For what it's worth, I'd never have a smear until 2 years ago. It wasn't until I needed this treatment (which required regular smears) that i finally forced myself to do it. They really are nothing to worry about pain wise.. but nope, a male doctor is a step too far for me.

(Please have your smear)

The "just get over it" brigade are why people like me are terrified and overdue their smear. You're not helping anyone, in fact you make it worse. Fuck off.

100% this

Speaking as someone who works in the hospital - once you’ve seen one vagina, you’ve seen them all 🤷🏼‍♀️

Chaperones aren't automatic, you have to ask for them - at least at my GP that is the case and the trained staff may not be there in which case you'd have to go back. Interestingly when my GP did a fairly intimate examination a few years ago he asked if I wanted a chaperone and I said yes.

He then said I was only the second woman who'd said yes. I was surprised he didn't want one there to protect him!

Glad you've been able to rebook and no you don't have to be grateful, it's something that should be flagged in advance.

@Bubblemonkey I’m very aware that certain medics see vaginas all day every day, mine is no different than the one before or the one after and that the doctor probably won’t even remember me or my appointment. I’m also aware they probably see them as just another body part and it is simply part of their job. However, I still would not feel any way comfortable with a male doctor performing a smear on me at any point, no matter how I tried to think of it.

Doctors doing smear tests? What a waste of their time.

That’s a job for nurses.

Speaking as someone who works in the hospital - once you’ve seen one vagina, you’ve seen them all

Well, as someone working in a hospital you should be ashamed at your ignorance of trauma. You're failing your patients.

"Drs/Nurses do them all the time" "once you've seen one you've seen them all"

If people (especially medical professionals) could stop using this line of reasoning, especially when it involves someone with trauma, then that'd be great, thanks.

YOU might do this every day, the PATIENT doesn't.
The patient doesn't spend all day having a stranger eye level to their genitals, being touched.

THEY ARE NOT COMPARABLE SITUATIONS, STOP INVALIDATING TRAUMA WITH YOUR IGNORANCE.

Ok maybe I'm harsh on the get on with it.

But my first smear was in an emergency situation, they knew something was seriously wrong and trying desperately to rule things out.

In a four bed ward with a curtain, emm when was your last smear?
Never had one?
Are you ok with us doing one now?

I've also been through fertility treatment so the inhibitions have kind of gone.

Speaking as someone who works in the hospital - once you've seen one vagina, you've seen them all

Yes, well it's not about how you or how many vaginas you've seen, it's about the patient and her feelings about her smear test.

I'm pretty hardy about these kind of female tests but the first time I had a man carry out a mammogram on me I did feel quite uncomfortable, and there was no offer of a chaperone.

Procedures like smears and mammograms feel very intimate and invasive for many women, regardless of how many the person performing them has carried out.

Nobody should ever have to feel uncomfortable or distressed during any sort of medical procedure. If this means they prefer to be treated by a woman rather than a man then that should be their right.

Why’s everyone saying “Oh, there’ll be a chaperone” as if that makes it all fine? OP doesn’t want a man carrying out an intimate and invasive test, regardless of there being a dozen chaperones. I’m the same. Tell them to get a woman to do the test, it’s irrelevant who’s watching.

I expect I'll get flamed for this OP but you always have the option of stating you are only comfortable with a female doctor when you actually book, to save wasting a slot by turning up and it then being unsuitable. This is what I do and I very often hear other women doing the same at reception.

Of course the NHS cannot 100% guarantee in in the respect of the fact people may ring in sick etc but by and large I have always found it fine- just bear in mind that if it's for gynae then the wait will be longer. Lots of people struggle with smears regardless, including myself so just do whatever you need to do to get it fine- ask for it to be put on your file that you only want a female doctor, depending on the department they can add it to your notes.

Also, OP - you can have a smear done by your GP or practice nurse. Perhaps it would provide more consistency than directly having it at a large hospital. You could see the same person everytime, virtually gurantee who it is etc. The results can be passed on as with any other results.

My sister has a real problem with smear tests, they’re always really painful & she has them done in a hospital. She always asks for a female doctor when she books

Last time she arrived it was a man and when she said she’d specifically asked for a woman she was met with much eye rolling & tutting. She was already stressed enough and that made her feel much much worse.

I wouldn’t mind a man doing it but that’s me & ive no right to say just coz I’m fine with it, everyone should be fine with it

@Alsohuman

Totally agree. There was a female nurse in the room (there is always 2 women when I go). Its not about having someone else there. I don't want it done by a male.

@dontgobaconmyheart
(Great name). I don't book the appointments, they get sent to me automatically.

URPS Glad you were able to re-book and insist on a female practitioner.

As others have said, it's about the patient's view and feelings on the issue, NOT the practitioner's 'familiarity' with female genitalia.

I shall add that I have long found smears exceptionally painful, even more so since menopause. I have insisted on having a female practitioner do them ever since a male doctor treated me appalling ly and hurt me very badly whilst doing my smear.

Doctors doing smear tests? What a waste of their time.

Surely if the OP has been asked to go to the hospital, a medical professional has decided that a doctor should perform the smear?

In any case, in many, many countries in the world, annual gynae checks including smears and breast examinations are performed by gynaecologists. I don't get the impression from mine that she thinks it's a waste of her time. Before I moved abroad I had smears with a practice nurse, who on several occasions failed to find my cervix. Because of these experiences I believed smears were always painful and didn't have one for six years. Imagine my surprise when I had my first one with my gynaecologist and I barely noticed it. I really appreciate the fact that this gynaecological procedure is being performed with someone who deals with gynaecological issues all day every day.

for you OP and well done for standing up for yourself.

Sorry bold fail on the first line which was a quote

Thanks all.
I'm surprised by the vote if I'm honest. Are half the women on here really okay having a male do their smear ?

I think more than that will be fine with it, but respect the rights of those who aren’t to ask for a female doctor.

I'm desperately upset my lovely male GP (who's looked after me through pregnancy and miscarriage as well as smear tests) is retiring. He's brilliant at totally physically discomfort-free smear tests. His wife was a midwife, and he was desperate not to cause me any pain or discomfort. The worst ones I've had have been done by "We're all women here, stop being a wimp" female GPs. So, in my admittedly limited experience, male GPs (no practice nurses at surgeries where I live, even if I wanted one, just GPs of both sexes) are more sensitive to how they treat us.

But each to their own - I'm probably not the majority!

It doesn’t matter what most women are fine with. What’s important is that everyone who wants a woman doctor gets one.