To ask for a handhold? Heading for a mental breakdown depending on tomorrow

[WhyThisLife]

Probably not the right section for this but with the traffic AIBU gets, here I am!

I'd like to ask for a handhold, some group support, a chat etc... As I prepare for my hospital appointment tomorrow.

I have been struggling with fertility issues for a while now and I am currently pregnant. Tomorrow is the scan where I find out if this is viable or not (I've had quite a few previously where I've been told they aren't and had to have D&C's or surgery etc...).

It's all taking its toll now and it's taking all my strength to go in that room willingly tomorrow and not being dragged kicking and screaming. I hate being there, I hate watching people coming out before me all happy and going over to the machine to pay for their scan photos, I hate the look on the nurses faces as soon as they can see on the screen and their 'im very sorry' voices when they tell me again, I hate being walked out and put in the 'quiet room' and seeing everyone's sympathetic faces in the waiting room because they know why.

I am seriously concerned about how I will be tomorrow if it's the same news. I am so so so fed up. I feel like I'm heading for some sort of breakdown but I can't bring myself to give up either.

I don't want to worry DH too much (although he does know how I'm feeling), so can I trouble you all for some support/conversation please? I feel so jittery and restless waiting for tomorrow.

Oh OP I can completely understand and all the feelings you describe- the whole set up of the clinic and just waiting for what feels like the inevitable playing out.

I think you could plan to just leave straight away if it’s bad news and your DH can phone in later for an appointment if you need medical miscarriage management. Don’t hang around just get the scan and go.

I hope your gynaecologist will see you if it’s more bad news and talk about any other options. It seems so awful for you to have gone through 8 miscarriages and still be on the same process and cycle.

You sound amazing and my heart goes out to you. I’ll be thinking of you this morning.

Good luck today ♥️

Have been there too, in the quiet room
My thoughts and prayers will be with you today.

Good luck OP

Thinking of you today OP.

Woken up thinking of you OP

The very best of luck for today, op. I really hope this is the one 💐❤️🤞

Good luck for today xxxxx

Good luck.

Thinking of you and wishing you the best of luck 😘

Thinking of you today OP

Reaching out with a huge hand hold for you OP.

I just wanted to say I'll be thinking of you today op. Good luck

Goodluck today, deep breathes. Got everything crossed for you, I know the struggle. Thinking of you xx

Hope today goes well. X

All the very best for today @whythislife I hope you get good news.

Lots of love today

Op I've only read the first page but dh had a translocation which gave a 50% chance of miscarrying and 10% chance of a baby with a chromosome disorder. I had 3 mcs then 2 unaffected babies who are a joy to me

Hand hold here xxx all the best for today, lots of folk sending you love x

Handhold and thinking of you and your DH.

Good luck xx

Thinking of you today op. Wishing for a very happy outcome for you xxx

I have everything crossed for you OP. I’ve had the misery of a mmc 6 times and it’s such a weird thing, the first time I went fir my 12 week scan with no idea anything was wrong and I just couldn’t understand how my body was still vomiting every hour and yet the baby had died weeks prior. Seems especially cruel to go through HG when things have ended. My body also doesn’t seem to end things naturally I’ve had to have pessaries or d&cs every time.

But I also had my 2 miracle pregnancies and adopted 2 pretty awesome kids. I wish the same for you xx

All the best for today-wishing you joy!

Sending you so much luck