AIBU to think decluttering is fucking hard?

[messopotamia]

Trying to declutter the house. It’s a shit tip. A large shit tip. There is no room which could be described as presentable right now, and we’re in the middle of the world’s slowest renovation to boot.

I need a decent chunk of time to be motivated. But between everyday life commitments I seldom get the chance, or when I do I have to catch up on the everyday
chores so have zero motivation by the time they’re done.

If I do get the chance to do something, I find the mental load of making endless decisions exhausting. Then I have to figure out how best to store things. Our house is large but most of the storage is impractical. I do have diagnosed anxiety and depression which I know doesn’t help, but it would be nice to not be constantly tripping over things all the time.

I’ve tried Marie Kondo, Flylady, TOMM. Nothing seems to work as there’s just not enough time.

AIBU?

I agree, it’s tough. Ours isn’t too bad but we’ve just accumulated too much stuff. I have three young DC including a 12 month old and seem to only manage to find about an hour a week to get stuck into the decluttering. Even keeping on top of the basic cleaning/washing etc is tough enough!
I took 3 bags of clothes to the clothes bank today though, so will get there eventually I hope

I need a decent chunk of time to be motivated.

You might not. Getting rid of one thing a day would mean your home will be 365 things clearer this time next year.

It’s better to do something small than nothing at all.

Sounds like my dream! I’m so organised that when I declutter my house I only end up getting rid of one or two items, if I lived next door I’d be round in a shot to help... I just love organising. I do appreciate I may not be the norm though.. !

The difficulty of decluttering is compounded by my husband who won't let anything out of the front door as it "will come in useful one day" This is stuff that's been stored in plastic boxes for 20 years. It's a soul destroying fight.

Try the Marie Kondo method again, but break it down into one hour chunks. Once you get going, you get into the mindset and it’s easy to carry on. Sit down and read the whole book first and take notes as you go.
You got this!

I find it easy because I hate clutter. If it's broken, ugly or hasn't been used in a year throw it out.
If it's not used or pretty, find a tidy way to store it out of sight.
Pinterest has some good ideas for storage.

I don't get this tbh. Just pick up stuff and if you don't use it bin it. Once you've got rid of a load of stuff cluttering up space it will be much easier to actually tidy away the stuff you use

Meant to say if it's not used or pretty but you feel compelled to keep it then find a way to store out of sight.
Start with kitchen cupboards and take a bag for rubbish and a box for the charity shop.

Goodbye, Things: On Minimalist Living amazon.co.uk/dp/0141986387/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_psEmEbZ8GH0YX]]

Short version - chuck more things out than you accumulate. This helped me at Christmas when stuff was flooding into my house and I needed to get rid of the old stuff!

Goodbye, Things: On Minimalist Living amazon.co.uk/dp/0141986387/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_psEmEbZ8GH0YX]]

No idea why the link keeps messing up! Anyway I'm sure you can find it from the title.

What are your food cupboards like ? Bathroom cupboards ?
If a mess start there , then that messy drawer every house has, sort that.
Once you've done those you might see other areas that you feel you could tackle. Good luck. Doesn't practice what she preaches

You don't need an hour. You need 20 minutes a couple of times a week.

Starr with something easy like the cutlery drawer.

1. Do I use it? Keep.

1. Do we need it? Keep.

1. Is this fkng annoying? Bin. And actually put it in the bin.

Wipe the drawer and put it all back together.

Then think of your next target tiny space. I'd choose another kitchen place so soon the kitchen will be in order.

I did 2 boxes of toys today. Donated some nice stuff to preschool and then used the two empty plastic boxes to store the 20 pairs of shoes by the front door. Killed 2 birds with one stone and looks much better.

I find it difficult too. Just don't know where to start. It doesn't help to have a DH who won't get rid of anything either - plus he brings back crap treasures from his DM's house every time we visit. The other day we were at a local event where some maps of interest were being displayed. The holder of the items said he would like to pass them on to someone else - DH volunteered to have them at my house! He got a look from me from across the room.

My DH is exactly the same as he always wants to keep something just in case we might need it in a million years time. We have drawers of wires and chargers for stuff we no longer have. Old electronic equipment that probably isn’t compatible with anything anymore and most likely doesn’t work. We live in a small house which is too cluttered, which makes it difficult to keep clean and tidy. Im hoping once the clutter is gone that it will make keeping the house clean and tidy much easier.

I’m gradually decluttering as we are moving house shortly as there is no way I want to move clutter from A to B. I’m doing 20/30 mins a night x

I find that I have to stop DH from buying or borrowing crap that he never returns. Every time he goes to buy something now I shout why are you buying that crap we didn’t need it we already have X/Y/X. Stopping the influx of crap was a key issue. I just have to declutter and make sure that DH doesn’t start buying crap as soon as we move to the bigger house!

Yes keep on doing a little bit a day, but I would say it sounds like rather than just Decluttering maybe you should rethink your storage solutions? Choose one room, decide what the storage problems are and try and find a new solution.

The key for me is that

1. Everything has a place

And 2. I have to actually put the thing back in it’s place!

I find it incredibly easy, I just look at everything and if I don't love a particular item it goes to the charity shop or the dump, I don't understand peeople who have clutter everywhere.

Yep! I'm moving at some point and need to only take a limited amount of stuff, a nightmare! Only upside in my case is that stbexh is having the house so I can abandon household junk I don't want. I've already taken 10 sacks to the charity shop this year

I agree with the little and often approach.
Kondoing just wasn't for me because there was a huge risk I would get everything out and then get distracted or waylaid.
I keep a charity shop bag next to the recycling and every time I come across something we don't need when I'm straightening up goes it there. I'm much better at putting broken toys and useless flimflam straight in the bin too.
I'd say I take a full bag to charity every two weeks. It's part of my school run now.

Yanbu. I have got rid of loads of stuff (at least 1 bag for life full every week) but dh seems to collect junk.

YANBU. It is hard and if you are like me it is mentally tiring to decide what to do with stuff.

I do a kind of Flylady-lite - I made my own zones and will declutter 15 mins in the week's zone but certainly not every day and sometimes not even every month. Just whenever I can. Maybe aim for once a week. I like the zone concept because (a) each room gets a bit of attention and (b) if you don't manage it one month you know that room is on the rota for the next month so it never feels hopeless.

Also, I listen to a podcast, the radio or music as I do it.

I would also strongly let your family know that if things are left on the floor they are not being cared for properly and will be donated if not put away.
It's hard to tackle this on your own so set up expectations with family and be persistent in enforcing them.