Why do middle class people have busier social lives?

[swimmingpoolshower]

Feel I may get flamed here but...
I'm WC, maybe a bit MC cos I went to uni. I am also a part time cleaner for MC families and have lots of MC friends. Why do MC people always have so much going on?

Is it money to be able to do things?
Boredom of doing the same things?
Letting off steam from stressful jobs?

No judgement at all but every weekend is house warming, birthday meals, theatre, trips to museums, and that's when you're not 'away for the weekend.' Centre parcs, Rome, Cotswolds, Air BnB in the city. It's January, everywhere is going to be cold.

I think I'm a bit jealous tbh.

Not my experience. DH brings work home every evening and works a lot of the weekend too. Many evenings and weekends are tied up with taking DC to clubs/sports/activities. We are definitely MC by DH's work and our income but I don't recognise us in the activities you list in your OP. I am lucky enough to have a cleaner who is always telling me I should get out more, lol.

Middle class means different things to different people. I would have said I'm middle class as I'm not a manual worker but I don't have any friends offering me their summer houses in Stockholm, more's the pity. I do go out to museums and concerts but mostly free ones!

Swimming yes confidence does play a part.

I don't always slob on the sofa at the weekend. But I do have the confidence to go to say, the theatre alone.

I've never been on a mass family trip anywhere. We are spread out across the U.K. though so when family get together it's as described somewhere above, at a nice restaurant or a country pub.

I don't think it's just about money - I have enough to do some of those things, I just don't want to.
I like my home life and use the weekends to relax and recharge - but my best friend is like the people in your OP, always busy, always on the go. She's been like it ever since she was a teenager though - used to have at least 2 things on the go every evening after school!

I do not have the energy to do that, I get worn out far too quickly - but she just keeps going and going.

When I lived on my own and had plenty of "spare" money to do what I liked, I would still voluntarily stay at home at least 2 weekends out of every 4 just to re-charge!

I'm WC/MC, hard to tell these days - had a professional job before becoming a SAHM, went to University etc. etc. - but I don't think that's necessarily the driver, it's personality and maybe keeping up with other people? (although that in itself is supposedly a MC driver)

I consider myself WC, but have a MC job.
I don't understand why. I thought your job was a class-defining factor.

I guess it depends where you live. In a big city there's more likely to be free / extremely cheap activities and reasonable public transport fares. Ryrally, public transport might be super expensive and only have fee-paying smaller museums locally, for example.

But I also think it's about values too.

Yolo and i am eternally curious and interested in everything so I am always taking advantage of opportunities and events that are mostly free around where i live. I think its more a mind set.

This is not actually true of my experience. My w/c friends and family have a great social life.

I don't think it's just money. It's cultural and goes back hundreds of years. It's about being part of a social scene

This.

It’s your kids being in boarding school after you were and your parents and your parents being in there too. It’s owning land and property that yield you income with out having to work or be paid a living. It’s about marring some one from the same background and containing the same social standing.

It’s not about uni, national trust walks or dinner parties or not leaving washing on the side

Regarding the washing on the side - my friend who’s very wealthy because of her family, went to boarding school is a total hippy and her house is a mess! She has a huge Victorian house with a gym horse, piano and a wooden kids climbing frame in her living room. She also regularly appears in home style magazines. So it’s not about serving hors d'oeuvres and tinkly laugh!

This is the most cringe worthy post I’ve seen on MN - self declaration of MCness

My most MC friend (I grew up MC and lean slightly more towards WC now)- is extremely sociable. Yes a huge amount is because of money- another side is because she has a lot of friends. “Tonight I’m seeing
So and so from the last company I worked with
So and so from my uni days
So and so from my ski season
So and so who I met through a friend of a friend.

I imagine the sterotypical WC person who didn’t go to uni, lives where they grew up and doesn’t travel wouldn’t have such a vast social pool

I think it about appearing to be "busy". Not doing anything is lazy according to my MC & UC relatives.

Maybe they liked it.

I just looked at some old holiday photos last night and realised how much I loved it and how amazing it was.

I go stir crazy pottering around at weekends

@ThumbWitchesAbroad same. I have the money to do those things but generally can’t be arsed. I’m a home bird / enjoy my own company and love nothing better than kicking back in my house! It’s a mind set / personality thing.

I’m defiantly (not a sp error) WC.

As much as I don’t identify with most of the WC behaviours mentioned on this thread, I agree with the premise of the OP.

I don’t so much feel it’s money related, although obviously you can’t do much with no money but you can also do little with lots of money.

There just seems to be a huge movement of competitive “busyness.” I wouldn’t say it’s a class thing though beyond the inane banging on habits/skills of my MC friends and family.

PGtips please tell me you're friend doesn't have children and she uses the climbing frame herself

I think it's a mixture of money, expectations of your "set," and individual personality.

I don't come from the UK but more or less fit into the middle-class category. But I don't do this level of socializing or busy-ness, partly because my income is low, and partly because I am very introverted. I would far rather stay home quietly on my own and potter about the garden or kitchen or watch telly or do cross-stitch or something, because I find those activities enjoyable. I enjoy visiting museums and cultural sites, but hate parties and dinners and don't really even understand what a "city break" is

Mc socialising just,seems to be far more thought out, planned, time consuming and expensive.

For example, my wc friend called me up on a Saturday morning and asked if I wanted to meet her at the local shopping centre and grab a quick coffee in the m&s cafe. My mc friends wouldn't dream of doing this. Theyd arrange a brunch at a nice restaurant and it would be organised in advance. I think wc friends often spend more time together but doing ordinary day to day things like shopping or sitting round each others houses watching tv whereas mc people often keep their friends more at arms length as social occasions are for catching up with each others lives rather than being a part of their lives iyswim.

The big thing is money. I'm working class and grew up in a council house. When I was a child in the 70s we went to the beach, the cinema, days out to zoo etc but obviously not every week, my mum took us to the park where there was a paddling pool and we went on picnics. My father was a semi skilled worker in an engineering factory and my mother worked part time in catering. We had holidays in caravans most years(this used to be cheap it doesn't seem to be now). These days both parents need to work full time at the very least to do that and the cost of living has gone up and wages have gone down for working class jobs in comparison. Having been a single parent for a few years I can say there were lots of things I wanted to be able to do with my daughter but just couldn't afford it. We did picnics etc but cinema was just out of the question. The cinema used to be an affordable working class outing. I'm aware that I'm sounding like my gran now!
I would also say that it is hard to get away from your class in UK, I live in a middle class area and my husband works as a healthcare professional but I would still not call myself middle class. I disagree that if you work for a living you're working class, it depends on what job you have education etc. I think the whole class system is shit but we will never get rid of it here. I love going to museums and National Trust properties, I do get that some working class people think "it's not for the likes of us" but there are plenty like myself who would love to go. Someone mentioned there PIL having money and not wanting to do much, I think that's an age thing, for some at least. My parents are in their 80s and my dad who is fit and well cannot be arsed to go anywhere, my mum has to drag him! I also feel there is more of a general pressure now on everyone to do more with their leisure time due to maybe social media and advertising.

I think there’s an element of Competitive Busyness with many middle class families.

The busier the family is, the number of after school/ weekend activities the children are involved in and the amount of aimless driving the parents do to support all this, is worn like a badge of honour.

The cynic in me would suggest that some of the socialising among the parents, is as much to do with finding out what other people are up to and boasting about their own achievements , as it is actually enjoying each other’s company.

As a family, we have full, interesting and varied lives and are fortunate to be financially secure but we also really enjoy time together at home or in the garden doing not very much at all.

I came from a very poor background but every weekend was spent in a free art gallery, museum or park, for which I will be eternally grateful to my parents for providing such a rich start in life.

Villanomme she does and they are very ‘spirited’

@SleepDeprivedElf I agree there is more free stuff in town than rural locations and public transport crap so if you don't have a car you're stuffed

Part of it is that MC people are likely to have moved about more (left home for uni, moved somewhere else for a grad scheme, moved again for next career step) and will perhaps have friends from all those stages. Meeting up with school friends or uni friends means a weekend trip (or at least a whole Saturday) for me.

One of my colleagues is WC and has lived here all her life - she has as many friends as me (probably more) but it's easier for her to integrate them and she can see them with less organisation because they mostly all live within half an hour of us. Her friends from school, previous jobs, children's friends' parents, etc. all live near her.

We spend about 200 pound a weekend and we hardly do anything. Just terrible with money and in no way mc.

Money and keeping up with the Jones' presumably.

I’m WC living a MC lifestyle (wealthy DH!) and for us it’s just that we have the money to do these things. It’s about giving our dc’s experiences we didn’t have as kids.
I think for a lot of people it’s keeping up with the Joneses though - we don’t talk about what we do much but some people’s raison d’etre seems to be gassing about what what they are doing this weekend in a very loud voice so everyone can hear (in my dc’s playground anyway!)