To still share a book with my y7 son

[nyorksdad]

Happy to be told aibu but thought I would canvas opinions.

My 12 year old son (from a previous relationship) has always loved reading (like me).

Ever since he was little, we've had a tradition of reading a few pages from a book each night together in his room before he goes to sleep. Either he reads or I do. This has progressed over his life from baby books through Thomas the Tank engine! and onto teenage thrillers, sci-fi and comedy now. We must have been through hundreds but he still wants to do it.

I enjoy doing it, it's a bit of quality time together when he's not glued to a gadget, he's actually paying attention to me, I don't have to fob him off because of work and we like to discuss the book together. I don't see it as any different to listening to an Audible or going to a book club! Obviously he does read by himself during the day as well.

My girlfriend however, thinks it's ridiculous at his age and I should pack it in and just send him to bed to read his book on his own and I'm not helping him grow up. Apparantly all her friends agree so just thought I would ask what people thought.

It's beautiful. Do your son a favour and ditch the woman

That is so lovely, and a great example to your DS. Please keep it as long as he will let you.

It’s a lovely thing to do. I know a couple that actually take it in turns to read out loud to each other when they both want to read a book. Being read to isn’t just for kids!

We read. I’ve read to my son every night for almost 10 years now and will continue to do so for a long time to come I hope. My Dad and I still share books and have done so for 50 years.
Your GF is jealous of the time not spent with her and can’t see the importance of reading and that special time with your child. Such a shame. As for ‘all her friends think the same’ LOL they don’t - that’s the kind of thing my son says! Is she a reader? Guess not. Could you once a week read to them both, she might learn to appreciate it!

Get rid of your girlfriend

Always put your son first.
He obviously still enjoys it.
Keep doing it

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Votes and everyone agrees! YADNBU

I read to my 10 and 9 year olds. Sometimes at bedtime, but often at the kitchen table whilst they have a snack. My cousin read to her daughters until the eldest left home, because the girls shared a room and there is an eight year age gap. The eldest loved lying in bed during her sister's bedtime, listening to their mum read, she used to post about it on Facebook.

Don't stop this! He's only 12 which is still young and this time and activity together is so important - it may even be the one quality, enjoyable 'constant' in your son's life (not knowing more details obviously, but I'd imagine through all of the ups and downs of his life this has been a time of joy and comfort for him and quality bonding for you both).
I agree with PP that it's your GF who's got an issue - the activity is definitely NOT an issue. To stop, and leave him to it while you sit downstairs alone or with your GF would create a much bigger problem and could leave your son feeling really rejected. You'll know when to stop as HE will make it clear
You sound like a lovely dad.

I read to my 12-year-old most bedtimes (we have just finished Watership Down and started on The Eagle of the Ninth) and my 21-year-old often sits on the end of his bed to listen when she is home. We all enjoy it and the eldest says when she re-reads some books she can still hear my voice in my head.

Don't stop OP. It's a lovely thing to do for both of you, will foster a love of books in your DS and gives him the chance to enjoy books above his personal reading level.

Your girlfriend is talking tripe and it's really, really none of her business.

I still read to my children. Eldest 14.

She discussed it with her friends? That's horrible considering she wants to now make you believe they all agree it's odd.

She sounds horrible, nasty and jealous.

Keep reading with him, it's a fantastic thing to do

Yawn (for your GF) - of course you aren’t. Besides the excellent bonding time you get, if you read aloud to an older child you get to read harder books and so give them a valuable education about vocabulary, through your use of expression. They can also ask you what words mean as you read.

I agree too with PPs who said that you reading will make them more amenable to listen to stories they might not have picked themselves.

Just to swim against the tide a teeny bit... if you do normally fall asleep (as per an update) and she's left sitting in the living room waiting on you coming back, then that's not really ideal. Doesn't mean you should stop the reading though! Just don't fall asleep

DD and I read at night until she was about 16. I also read to her while she was in the bath.

Your son is benefiting so much from your time together! It's so great that you're still reading to him and it's also great that he's still enjoying it. Please don't stop just because your GF is a cow!

Just to swim against the tide a teeny bit... if you do normally fall asleep (as per an update) and she's left sitting in the living room waiting on you coming back, then that's not really ideal. Doesn't mean you should stop the reading though! Just don't fall asleep..

Don't worry, I don't get to stay alseep - quick blow to the ribs as soon as he notices soon puts paid to that:)

When I used to read to DS the dog would come and sit on my lap and listen too . Used to love it when we all snuggled together

Mine are 13 & 9 - the younger one is quite dyslexic and has problems following storylines- she needs help remembering who everyone is & what's going on.. I read a story (or these days a chapter of a story) to them every night (whilst they also polish off 1/2 pint of milk in suck-a-mugs - as milk spillages are gross). We all wind down & I get a hug. If you get that too, then treasure it.

I think it's lovely and as a teacher, great education wise. It sounds to me like she's jealous of the time you're reading with him, while she is downstairs by herself, instead of watching the tv or whatever with her. Please don't stop!

I read to my 2 year old and take turns reading with my 6 year old. I don’t see that changing.
My mum always read to my sisters and I each night (or we would each take turns)
but I also read to my DH and he’s 42!

Posted too soon.

Dh isn’t a reader for pleasure and was never read to as his parents didn’t read English. (And aren’t book people)

He reads to our daughters at night but finds did it hard to read to himself so I will read a chapter out loud in bed at night as a wind down.

Isn’t that why audiobooks are big money?
Everyone loves being read too!

Read to your son if you both enjoy it.

I have very fond memories of reading books with my dad. Initially it meant he could read me books that were a little bit too hard for me to read on my own but it was also just an opportunity to bond and have some peaceful time together. All of my family were big readers and it didn't prevent me from growing up or being able to read on my own etc.
I think you should cherish the opportunity for as long as your son wants to, it won't be long before he thinks he's too cool for it!

I read to my 10 year old every night. We’re reading Percy Jackson at the moment along with a book of Greek and Roman myths which fit in so well together. I hope that it will continue for quite a few more years as there are heaps more books we have that we haven’t yet read such as watership down and the earthsea books.

Definitely keep doing it. This is very special quality time and it's good parenting.