Apologies this is long but I don't want to drip feed... I Would love to know if you think IABU or not.
We are off to Disney world in a few months, family of 4 (2a, 2c 6 and 12) we wanted to sit together so we've booked seats on the plane.
We also wanted to take my MIL with us as she's lovely, does everything for everyone, never gets a break and is always there for us, she's very close to the DC. She's not in a position to pay for herself and so we asked if they (her and her DP) would like to come with us and obviously we would pay for them they said yes... all they have to do is pay for their spending money.
None of us are particularly close to her DP (my DP's Step dad) as even though they've been together for 25 years, he's never shown an interest in spending time with us or our DC. We do invite them both to dc party's but mil always comes alone and says he's on call for work.
we obviously knew she wouldn't want to go without him so of course we offered to pay for both.
When I told MIL they could book seats on the plane now to secure their seats with us or wait til 24h before to try and get the seats she wants for free, she said 'no no no, DP is on it now as he's desperate for a window seat' and then she came back and said he wants the row of 2 seats at the other end of the plane to where we have booked so she has room to get out without disturbing anyone next to her when she walks up to see us'
I pointed out the window seat behind ours and suggested I can then move one of our seats so we're sitting in 2 rows of 3' (rather than the row of 3 and one aisle seat I've already booked) and then she wouldn't have to worry about getting up.... and I added 'unless DP doesn't want to sit with us?' and she said 'no don't worry, don't change what you've booked it's just he's a big kid and wants a window seat....'
I asked what's wrong with the window seat behind ours and she said 'don't worry he's going to try and get the seats he wants 24h before as that's more exciting... which is of course not what she said above!
So basically he doesn't want to sit with us. That's fine but I know MIL wouldn't have an issue sitting with us and I think she thought she would be and was excited about it as she herself was saying she can't wait to see the kids first take off!
Usually I back down and people please but her DP is irritating me for a few reasons... for example, MIL struggles a lot with her mobility and as she doesn't like to ask for things she's said to her DP that she'll be fine waking around Disney and there's no need to pay for her to hire a wheelchair while we're there... he just says ok. So I know we're going to have to hire it because MIL cant walk even the shortest distances without being in pain.
he's also declaring which days he's decided they're doing something different, (which is fine as we expect them to do their own thing too), but he's not asking her thoughts or asking what she wants... he just says 'we're doing this... and we're not doing that.'
Also MIL has a lot of pressure atm looking after her elderly parents, cooking their dinner and she also looks after her DPs elderly parents and is every body in her DPs family rock yet even though she's running herself ragged, he's just laying on the sofa all day watching love island and eating... she then she has to get in and do his dinner too... it makes me angry. Even though my DP says she's a big girl and can make her own decisions and choices, I can't help but feel someone should be saying enough is enough... anyway, I've digressed!
MIL and I are really close and can talk for hours, and she loves being with the kids, both kids are well behaved and it's not like a flight to Orlando is going to be peaceful anyway so I don't see what he gains by moving away from us.
And although this might not seem related I think it's important to say that even though we've paid we've said from the start that it's their holiday too and we really don't expect to do everything together. We've also all sat down and everybody had an opportunity to say what they wanted to do so FIL has plenty of things in the line up that he wanted to do but no one else did that we've all booked into.
Aibu?