Do you 'Expect' to Benefit from Your Parent's Will

[Pembsgirl]

My parents had nothing, so having no 'expectations' of an inheritance in years to come, I worked hard for everything I've got, but so many people own their own homes now, so am I being unreasonable in thinking that the vast majority of people these days 'expect' to benefit from their parent's Will, and wonder how they'd feel if parents left it all to people other than their children?

I’m assuming it’s all going to go on care home fees and costs like that, based on family experience.

They have either moved from cheaper homes like terraced houses in poor areas to nice houses in nice areas; or retired in their early fifties. Both things have improved people's lives. I don't understand why improvements in your life at that age are deemed unimportant?

We will no doubt get what my parents have, split between us kids.

How much that will be I have no idea. They are in their 70s, have a lovely big home, lots of money, holiday several times a year.

They have a life well lived and enough for care in their old age if it’s needed. There might be nothing left to inherit, there might be lots. No clue and I don’t care.

I have been told I and my sister will inherit. My parents have a house valued around £200,000 and they have savings of about £100,000 at the moment.

However I know a lot could happen; care homes, they decide to leave all the money to my sisters children (I have none); my parents spend it all - they do go on a lot of holidays a year at the moment.

I would be really annoyed if they did by-pass me and went to the grandchildren (if there was anything left) but I know that would have been there wish so would just need to live with it.

Given our respective ages and the fact my mum is in great health, there's a very real chance that by the time she dies I'll have paid off my mortgage, be retired and have no need of her money. I'd be completely happy if she skipped my generation and left all her money to her grandchildren.

My parents never had much money, didn't own their house and my Dad was very mean with money. As a result, he has about £60K in savings but is now in a care home, so most of that will go on his care. I feel quite bitter about the fact that he could have spent it on giving Mum a better life - she loved to go on little holidays (she didn't ask for much) but Dad refused to go anywhere. We knew her life was limited when she was doagnosed with cancer and I implored him to take her places. He wouldn't.

My parents are minted (didn’t come from money) but she’s a narcissistic woman and my father enables her
i went nc with them years ago-and money has always been the golden noose to keep us in our places
i won’t get a penny-and I’m happy with that-they are never going to hold that golden sword over my head
ill be amazed if I do get anything and I’ve made it clear to my dp that if I get just one penny,I’ll be giving it to my children
I don’t want it

my dp will get his parents house (he’s an only child as his sister died) a flat in London,shares and god knows what else-his dad was very canny when it came to money

we lost his dad last year and I’ll miss that man forever

My dad has left everything to me and brother but as he is in residential care, potentially all of it will go in his fees. He's 93.

That's certainly how it should be though, it is his money, it's not ours.

‘Expecting’ isn’t really the right word. I am an only child and I know I will be sole recipient of my parents’ estate. But who knows what will be left. I hope they live a long life and spend their money enjoying it. If there isn’t a penny left at the end, I don’t care. I don’t plan my own future based on an assumption that I will inherit a decent chunk of money. If I do, great, but I’d rather my parents live on happy and healthy long enough to spend most of it!

It is very likely DH & I will both inherit from our parents. They wouldn’t leave it to anyone else, and both sets of parents are wealthy.

However, I’d never say we expect it. We want them to enjoy their money and also to have the freedom to fund whatever help & care they may need in later life. If there’s something left, great. If not, just as great that they’ve enjoyed it & had their care needs met.

I did! I didn’t expect huge amounts but my parents always said we would inherit the house. DF remarried after DMs death. He said that new wife would be left “life interest” and the would all come to us. She said he didn’t actually leave a will and he’d actually arranged with a notaire (lived in France) to basically disinherit us. Nothing for my sibling, nothing for me, nothing for my children. Yes I am bitter.

if he’d spent every single penny I wouldn't have cared but instead his new wife gets it all and that grates.

We will inherit from 4 sets of parents are both divorced. It doesnt factor into my finances, as in I dont make decisions based on what I think I'll get. But I would be beyond surprised if they didnt. All parents own properties, pensions etc so usual caveat of care, I expect to inherit. Hopefully a distant time in the futurd

No because they’re farmers and I’m a girl 😢

Yes. My DPs are fairly well off, pensions, investments etc. It's just me and one sibling. I've seen their wills, everything is left to us 50/50. No care costs really to consider.
But I don't need it/relying on it.

Yes. Not because I feel entitled to their money but because they have told my brother and me that everything will be split 50/50 between us. I've no idea how much but they own a couple of properties and are well off. I just hope it doesn't come my way any time soon.

Nope.
We inherited from DH's parents but I expect my parents will use their assets to fund retirement.

I don't expect but I hope. I went without tons of stuff when I was a child because dad was careful and put money away for the future. I'd quite to get the some benefit of those deprivations rather than the state.

I haven't actually seen my parents' wills, but I would fully expect expect they will each leave a chunk to charity and that they will split the rest between me and my DSis, probably with some for our respective children. I don't consider that I have any entitlement to that money, I just know my folks well enough to know that that's what they would want to do. Anything else would be completely out of character.

That said, I am not actively expecting any inheritance, and I'm certainly not relying on it, because I'm well aware that my parents' assets could easily be eaten up by care home fees. And if they do end up needing care, then I will want them to have the very best care that they can afford, so if that eats up "my" inheritance, so be it. I didn't earn the money and I have no absolute right to it.

I made the mistake of.assuming my well off df would leave us some money , even for dgc. However, he left it all to his controlling and toxic dw , our step mother who he constantly sought to please and made it all about her at all times . She is now living with someone else. Sold the house, his cars . Hasnt given me items named for me in will( I got a copy , she didnt tell me ) She is really mean and refuses to help her dgc at all. What we assume now is we or our dc wont get anything.

My parents live in council house, and will be leaving nothing in their will. Whatever small sum will be in their bank accounts will be going on their funerals.

Yes the expectation is that we pass things on to the next generation. Usually increasing the value that we pass on. We have been able to do that in the generations that I know of.

Yes, my dad talks openly about it. I am not ‘banking’ on it though as fortunately, parents are both in good health! We haven’t included it in our pension pot and see it as a ‘bonus’. My in laws also talk openly about their will and have very sweetly added me to theirs. DH and I will ensure
our son knows he will be ‘looked after’ by us when we die. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being open about finances. Death is part of life.

My dad even discusses how he wants a coffin made of cardboard and just to be put in the bin with no fuss and definitely no funeral. He is v matter of fact which I found slightly tricky to deal with initially, but now realise for him, having all his affairs in order and how he would like to be ‘disposed of’ (!!) makes him feel comfortable about death, so in turn, I also feel more comfortable.We are all going to die after all and it shouldn’t be such a taboo subject.

Nope, dad left everything to mum who has dementia. I expect most of her inheritance to be spent on care costs.

Tbh expect most of it to go towards care of some sort or another. Not bothered tbh, we are comfortable and have never assumed any money is coming our way. We did have a convo with in-laws (cos they made us) but afterwards agreed that if DD was an appropriate age it would go straight to her anyway.

Think people underestimate the cost of elderly care until they are actually dealing with it. My mum is in a care home - £650 per week (others can be a lot higher). My dad has home help once a day £24 per hour. They are in their early 80s. They have savings and will be expected to pay these fees until they get to 21K (I think). Once my Dad is unable to live at home and or passes away, we will have to sell their house to continue to pay for care home fees.

People are living a lot longer than they used to. The care crisis is very real. Councils and governments are effectively bankrupt. Don't bank on that inheritance. Treat it as a nice bonus if you do receive it.