Do you 'Expect' to Benefit from Your Parent's Will

[Pembsgirl]

My parents had nothing, so having no 'expectations' of an inheritance in years to come, I worked hard for everything I've got, but so many people own their own homes now, so am I being unreasonable in thinking that the vast majority of people these days 'expect' to benefit from their parent's Will, and wonder how they'd feel if parents left it all to people other than their children?

my dad is a scrupulous probate lawyer and my parents are still together so my siblings and I will equally receive their estate. first he's giving us a significant amount as and when we are ready to purchase houses. it's not 'expected' i just know my parents, they are not interested in blowing their life's work on cruises and cars or whatever.

I do, because my DF has openly said that he’s leaving everything to me and my brother 50/50. I know he’s pretty comfortable currently but for all we know it could all be spent on care costs. I’m hoping he is around for many years yet!

@IHadADreamWhichWasNotAllADream

Correct re: affirming the inheritance. The problem is some, if not most people actually do not know whether they are/will be inheriting debt. Unless you are fully aware of your parents finances and/or trust them to be honest it's difficult to find out.

It's a constant legal issue in Germany because once you affirm by accepting the inheritance it's extremely unlikely to be able to reject it later on. On the other hand if you reject the inheritance and it ends up being profitable and debt free, you cannot reverse your decision. The laws on inheritance were to change in Germany a few years ago, but as far as I know they haven't yet.

Yes They live in a modest 2 bed semi which is probably Valued about £200k but they also have a lot of investments which are prob double that again

I know some provision is going to be made for grandkids and my Asshole brother

I’ve told them repeatedly to spend what they can, enjoy their holidays etc

My parents left everything in their wills to each other initially and then to me (an only child). Simple enough until my mum died and my dad developed dementia and needed to go into a care home. My advice is don't count on anything given the increasing need for dementia care for the elderly.

My mum and dad have been very open about it - DB and I will get their house. They are only in their 50s so hopefully they have long lives ahead of them, but obviously in the future the house may need to be sold for care costs if one of them falls ill, etc.

I am an only child. I will inherit everything that my mum owns, she's told me so. Unless she needs care in later life.

@UniversalAunt I don't actually know for sure what ex-MIL's will says now other than exH is 'running' the farm' but doesn't yet own it.
When we were still together his parents were going to sign it all over to him then (as I was seen as a stabilising influence and they were confident all would be ok). However his alcohol abuse was getting ever more severe and the farm is located in the absolute arse-end of nowhere and all I could see was a lifetime with a vicious drunk in the middle of nowhere so I kicked him out... They then 'changed their mind' about signing it over to him.

However the farm has been passed down father to son for ever and they all even were given the same name (think John Smith, John Smith Jr etc etc etc) so I really can't see her not giving it to my ex in her will, it would cause a huge fuss if she bypassed him to our daughter - his only child (not that she's interested at 17) and of his siblings he's the only one even remotely interested as the others knew it would go to him eventually so they moved away/never took any part in the work on it.
I think she's just thinking that all she can do is leave it to him and at least she wont be around to see it fuck up.

My Dad remarried after Mum died. I know full well that if he dies before new wife then we will get nothing. She has no children but will leave everything to her nephew.... we know this... she has told my Dad, she has told us... she won’t change her mind...

My parents yes, although knowing my luck, they'll need years of care and I won't get much. I know there are insurance policies and investments and they've been to the financial advisors so they can safeguard what they can.

I'm executor to my fil in laws will and in that situation we get nothing and everything will be shared between the 6 grandchildren. To be honest my husband and I felt it was a great thing for the kids and didn't bat an eyelid when they told us. Ultimately for us them helping the kids out helps us and frankly they'll never inherit much from us anyway

Yes split equally between the three kids. I anticipate most of it will be lost to care needs

Don’t know - but we don’t need the money and anything given to us will go into an account for the children.

My mum passed away 9 weeks ago, she was still working so my dad had a large death in service payout and is waiting to hear about what she had in 3 pensions but they had decent savings anyway despite having modest incomes.
I’m not bothered if my dad spends the lot, he deserves it.
However if he were to meet someone in the future which I suppose he very well could he’s only 61, I’d be upset for my mums money to be left to a new wife.

My Dad remarried after Mum died. I know full well that if he dies before new wife then we will get nothing. She has no children but will leave everything to her nephew.... we know this... she has told my Dad, she has told us... she won’t change her mind

So why doesn’t your Dad leave his share directly to his children? Why do men do this? Leave the house that he and the mother of his children worked hard for to a younger second wife? It is so common. It had happened to friends of mine. The worst part for them is knowing their mother’s would be heartbroken.

Why do men do this? Leave the house that he and the mother of his children worked hard for to a younger second wife? It is so common. It had happened to friends of mine. The worst part for them is knowing their mother’s would be heartbroken.

Why would ANYONE do this? Should I ever live with a man again I would make sure that my home, my daughters inheritance, is to go to her and not to new man.

My parents left their estate to me and my sister - worth £1.6 million. I bought my own house with my half, and will leave that to my kids. Nobody in my family has ever done anything different with their wills - everything goes to the kids.

I would not be surprised if my parents left everything to a cause they have become involved with in their retirement, if there is anything left after any care needs. Really I would prefer they spend on better care and comfort rather than sit on savings so they can hand them down. This is especially the case as they have moved far from the family so it's just not possible for anyone to give them practical day to day help if and when they need it.

On my in laws side they live a life of frugality so I know my dh thinks he is going to inherit a pot. However I think he will suffer a disappointment as there are lots of dark secrets in the past which will probably mean that not much is left at all. Also fil is really mean and stingy and they have an odd dynamic about money in the family which I can't see playing out well.

btw, those saying that wills of parents state that the inheritance should be split between step children, but think that their inheritance will go to one side should challenge any will that says that.

This has been held up in precedent in the past.

I expect debts upon debts to deal with and months and months of shifting through hoarded shit off my mum.
DF has nothing and what he does have will be used up being off work until he passes (he's terminal now)

That said, knowing the crap I will have to deal with when mum eventually goes, I'm insured up to the eyeballs despite being a SAHM. I'm worth a fortune dead so providing I can keep a good level of cover my own kids will be given a big help when I shuffle off this mortal coil. We live paycheque to paycheque for now so no real savings yet other than the £10 per month we put away for each child which they'll get when they hit 18.

**sifting

As it stands now, yes. Everything would be split 3 ways with my siblings. They’re not wealthy but comfortable enough to not worry about money. My parents have been quite generous with all of us over the years.

I’m not taking it for granted though, my Grandmother on my mother’s side lived till her 90s and was nothing like as fit and well as my mum currently is. And with potential care home fees who knows how much will be left.

My parents chose a interest only mortgage many years ago, so have no equity in that regard, and whilst my DF earns a lot, he is self employed in a very manual job so he won’t be able to do that into his mid-to-late 60s.
DM doesn’t earn much at all but they’re not even 50 yet so they have time to save for their future.
I really hope they save as much possible, so they have a comfortable lifestyle once my DF retires, but I don’t think they look that far ahead.

DH is expecting money once my ILs die, mainly as they’ve said it’ll be split between him and SIL, and they have a huge amount of money in both savings and property.
Unfortunately MIL is starting to show signs of early dementia which is sad as she only turned 60 a few years ago.
Her own mother started to show signs of it in her 60’s, and she’s now been in a care home for 22 years, so I doubt they’ll be anything left.

My parents owned their own house in SE. Small mortgage. My mum died at 48 having always worked and was the “saver/sensible one” My dad started dating 6 months later as he was very lonely and only 48 too. He married again to a lady that did not like the fact my father had a history and two children. They bought a house. He has now died. Everything has gone to the “new” wife. My mum would be so disappointed that her children got left nothing. At 48 she never thought to put ££ into trust for her children. We had 6 months notice from diagnosis to cancer to death. My dads wife has made it very clear to me and my sibling that she is leaving everything to her nephew.

My mum would be so disappointed that her children got left nothing. At 48 she never thought to put ££ into trust for her children. We had 6 months notice from diagnosis to cancer to death. My dads wife has made it very clear to me and my sibling that she is leaving everything to her nephew

My dad was the same. Except he dropped dead very suddenly at 48. his death benefits were huge as he was very financially savvy- everything went to my mum.

She never remarried but she's mismanaged her finances and now has nothing but a (admittedly sizeable) widows pension, but that dies with her. I'll get nothing.

Personally I think the second wife/subsequent marriage is not the issue. If you leave money to your spouse they can do with it what they want- new partner, cat's home, scam artist in Nigeria.

You want your kids to inherit, you need to set up your will so they do so. If my dad would have been disappointed we will get nothing, that's his fault for not sorting out a trust as much as it is my mums for spending her way through a couple of million quids worth of property and shares.

DH won't inherit anything - MIL & FIL (separated) have nothing, and there are many children. He'll be lucky if he gets a momento.

I would only inherit if my parents don't have to spend all their money on care - and I'd rather they spent it on professional care, than expected to live with us or have me struggle to care for either of them in their own house.

Whether I inherit depends on who passes first, DM or DSF. I know that DM will leave us something, not sure of the proportions of her estate between us children. DSF is a maverick - he could leave it traditionally, he could decide to share it amongst all his own blood relatives, he could skip a generation and leave it in trust for his grandson. So to answer the OP, I don't expect to inherit, it'll be nice if I do.