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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Breeder refusing to give me puppy or my money back

506 replies

Ownerofsmallpeople · 14/01/2020 18:30

I’m not sure if I’m being u or where I stand on this.
DH and I have decided to get a puppy early feb. We have a 2 year old and another on the way but not due til summer. We have wanted a dog for ages and decided now is the best time as my DC has just started full time nursery, I’m not in work so I have plenty of time during the day to train and spend time with the puppy. For a few weeks after I give birth DH will be taking over walks but I will still be doing the training during the day and newborn will be joining me on school runs etc so my routine doesn’t change really. I’ve raised puppies before so I know what it entails and also obviously had a newborn before so I don’t see any great issues.
We went to view some puppies a couple of weeks ago with DC, chose a specific puppy, breeder was happy discussing diet and training etc and then asked for a deposit. I paid the deposit via bank transfer the next morning. She has now text me last night and said she had one of her friends (who is also friends with me via Facebook) to have a look at my Facebook profile and show her what was on it and she has seen that I’m pregnant and now is telling me I’m “deceitful” and she “can’t trust me with her puppy”. I didn’t think it was a huge deal and I was required to tell her I was pregnant? Obviously the puppy is going to a good home with us so I don’t see an issue. I completely understand wanting your puppies to go to a good home that will look after them but I wouldn’t have thought having a baby 6 months after purchasing a puppy was a big deal.
The conversation went on for about 20 minutes of her basically patronising me and saying that in 6 months I would be calling her to take the dog back. I eventually said to her to either tell me she’s happy for the puppy to come to us or she’s not happy for the puppy to come to us, she replied “I’ll speak to my partner and decide”. I have not heard from her yet so I text her again saying she needs to let me know or send me my money back, she has read the message and ignored it.
Am I in the wrong? What would you do?

OP posts:
Ownerofsmallpeople · 16/01/2020 22:00

@bluebluezoo no, she didn’t

OP posts:
Ownerofsmallpeople · 16/01/2020 22:01

@bluebluezoo I also have a receipt of payment of the deposit which doesn’t say anything about it being non refundable

OP posts:
Honeyroar · 16/01/2020 22:04

Make sure you do file the claim. Don’t mess about any longer. If it’s not there by school run time that’s that.

CodenameVillanelle · 16/01/2020 22:19

You don't deserve the money back to be honest- you deserve to lose it for being such an irresponsible idiot in handing it over for a puppy in these myriad of unsuitable circumstances.
But she doesn't deserve to keep it either - awful backyard breeder profiteering off the health and well-being of her dog. So go get it back and for god sake educate yourselves before thinking of getting a dog again.

kb16 · 16/01/2020 22:31

Contact citizens advice and see what they have to say, fingers crossed!

SistineScreamer · 16/01/2020 22:39

You can't believe she would take a bitch in heat to the park? You who didn't know to ask to see the pup's mother or know which dog was the bitch? Fuck off, please. 😂 The high and mighty when you've been incredibly stupid yourself is revolting. You were going to buy a designer breed ...off Facebook ..you're not responsible in the slightest or any better.

You don't deserve the money back but she doesn't deserve to keep it for crossing those two bloody dogs. 😒

JasonPollack · 16/01/2020 22:41

She's a fucking chancer! Or she's thick enough to believe that she can just take people's money as a "deposit" and then keep it for made up reasons! I wonder if she's done it to others.

zoobincan · 16/01/2020 22:42

I’ve messaged her and said that I’ve been patient enough and I expect the money in my account by the time I finish my school run in the morning as I pass the post office on the way home and will be filing a claim to the small claims court and then reporting her to the police.

Oh OP please come back and let us know how that went Grin

NoFucksImAQueen · 16/01/2020 22:44

I thought you were going round?

GenderfreeJoe · 16/01/2020 22:51

Don't forget to add court costs etc to the claim.

flyingspaghettimonster · 16/01/2020 22:57

I initially agreed to hold a puppy for a woman 8 spoke with via email who planned to travel 7 hours drive to meet our puppies, and claimed she had good knowledge of the (quite difficult) breed from childhood etc.

When her and her husband arrived they were 18 year olds, and didn't speak English the whole time except occasionally she responded to me. Her husband only spole to her in Spanish so I couldn't understand anything they said. That wasn't a big deal, except it felt quite rude as they stayed an hour and basicalpy ignored me to plsy with the puppies. Then after the contract was signed and I had deposit and address and full name I did some investigating. I found they were actually even younger, 16 year olds who had become pregnant at 15 and married, and had a 3 month old baby at home they never mentioned. The address showed as being an apartment with no garden. The husband's facebook showed he was into street racing, again not relevant to his ability to care for a dog, but I can't stand irresponsible morons racing in cities, people die regularly here from being hit by these idiots. It also showed he had quit his last minimum wage job and was in no rush to find another
I was already in two minds at this point about how responsible they could really be, with so many huge life changes in such a short span. But I had 5 more weeks before the puppies were ready to leave.

Then came the emails. Could I reduce the price of the puppy? They had not realised how much it would cost driving so far to me and tolls etc, and it didn't seem fair paying full price. They suggested $300 instead of $500. I responded thst the price was based on the cost to raise the litter and care for mum beforehand, first shots and 2 vet visits, 2x wormer etc and high quality food and milk... I had a spreadsheet of every single cost so I could come up with a fair price. I wasn't making any profit. I told them if they felt the price was unfair I could refund the deposit.

Next email was ridiculous. She wanted me to let them pick up the puppy 2.5 weeks early because she was graduating the day after and wanted to take him to the graduation party. I said absolutely not, the puppy couldn't be out in public areas where other dogs might have been until all shots were given and it would be a very scary thing for a puppy on his first day away from his mother. Also not to mention it is illegal to send puppies home before 8 weeks, and I was waiting till 10 weeks.

At this point I was down to my last straw. I didn't want to trust them with the puppy and I felt if I did he would end up in the pound within a year. Then came another email demanding I reduce the price $100 and meet them half way since it was such a long drive. That would mean a 7 hour round trip for me, along with about $80 in gas and tolls, as well as the fact I would uave to trust them to show up at all, or bring the amount they werw supposed to... what would I do if they decided it was still too expensive at the point of exchange? It was all just ridiculous. I emailed back and said I was no longer confident that they could provide the home the puppy required, or the vet trips etc he would need and I sent back their deposit. I'm sure they were furious, and it stressed me lut knowing they knew where I lived, but given the long drive I assumed they would leave us alone.

Anyhow, my point is, raising puppies is incredibly hard work. It was tougher those 10 weeks than anything I think I've ever done, and the sole interest I had was getting the best possible homes for those babies. So if anyone is planning to buy from a breeder they should absolutely expect to be snooped into... i looked at social media accounts, I even found court documents about a bankruptcy on one of the future owner's parents... but the background check stuff is only part of it. The breeeder needs to have a good feeling about the owner. Why is this person interested in this breed? Why do they think it is a good fit for them? Have they anticipated the quirks and potential health risks of the breed? Or did they just watch Game of Thrones and fall in love with dire wolves and want something similar?

I think in the breeder's position I would be more wary of you with one toddler and a pregnancy. I would question how much time you would have for the puppy. Whether it would we be given less attention when the new baby came. Whether you had a good plan for affording vet treatment on top of all the new baby costs...

It doesn't mean the breeder is right. You might be an incredible home. But it does loom like a risk and if there are lots of others interested, the breeder should go with the bbest possible chance her dogs won't end up in a shelter.

zoobincan · 16/01/2020 23:08

@flyingspaghettimonster

There is no breeder.

Ownerofsmallpeople · 16/01/2020 23:28

@flyingspaghettimonster I agree with all of that, it is completely up to the lady if she wants to sell a puppy to me or not. But you paid their deposit back to them straight away and this lady is messing around.

OP posts:
Broken2020 · 16/01/2020 23:38

@flyingspaghettimonster Shock I agree they weren't suitable for the dog at all and fully understand the social media snooping; but going as far as looking at financial and legal information on the owners' parents is disgraceful behaviour! How dare you?! That is totally irrelevant and abhorrent to judge someone on the actions of their family member.

My brother was convicted 3 times for drink driving and I no longer speak to him or have anything to do with him because of it. Does that mean that you would refuse to sell me a puppy?!

Think about your actions please

Scarsthelot · 17/01/2020 05:27

@Broken2020 that poster didnt say they woildnt sell a puppy to someone whose parents were bankrupt.

I think the point was that when you start looking at someone online you can find all sorts and it's easy to check our peoples backgrounds. Which most people selling a puppy will do.

I was home checked by a breed specific rescue, during the course of contact with them I ended up working with them. I fully expected them to do a a check on me. Which is why the woman added homechecked people in Facebook.
To brother has been to prision, if anyone judged me nor aboenro oook gates a dog because of this, that's their issue and xpild have gone elsewhere for a dog or to help out.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 17/01/2020 05:48

@flyingspaghettimonster I didn't read your whole post because your first 3 paragraphs were ridiculous enough. Why would you even sign the contract if you couldn't actually communicate with them? Did you not want to reiterate everything that was said via email?

WinterRose92 · 17/01/2020 05:53

She’s really dragging her heels, isn’t she?

Micah · 17/01/2020 08:23

@flyingspaghettimonster shock I agree they weren't suitable for the dog at all and fully understand the social media snooping; but going as far as looking at financial and legal information on the owners' parents is disgraceful behaviour! How dare you?! That is totally irrelevant and abhorrent to judge someone on the actions of their family member

Why? She wasn’t judging, but came across it trying to build a picture.

I have a civil service job. When I got the job I was vetted- this included checks on my immediate family, i had to include parents, childrens, stepchildrens, husband, and il’s details so they could check them too.
they also look at social media and friends lists to see if i know anyone that isn’t appropriate.

Ok it’s a little different as my job puts me in a position where people could try and manipulate me to their advantage. But the point is it’s not unusual or irrelevant to include family to build up a picture of a person.

DeathByPuppy · 17/01/2020 08:29

I can’t believe you let that get as far as you did before calling a stop to it, @flyingspaghettimonster!

MissPepper8 · 17/01/2020 10:38

I found they were actually even younger, 16 year olds who had become pregnant at 15 and married, and had a 3 month old baby at home they never mentioned. The address showed as being an apartment with no garden.
I was already in two minds at this point about how responsible they could really be

What I don't get reading this is, if they were 16 why didn't you shut it down as soon as you found out then?? What you say is a difficult breed, 16 year olds, with a 3 month old child and they live in an apartment.

But you were still in “two minds“ about selling to them, should of been shut down when you found out they were 16.

LolaSmiles · 17/01/2020 10:51

I find it unbelievable that she even let her dog off the lead on heat
Dogs aren't allowed off lead at parkruns. The park run rule on dogs is one dog per person on a short lead only.

Her saying it's an accidental mating at park run with them off lead sounds like a poor cover story for intentional backyard breeding for profit. It's hardly surprising she's behaving like a scammer.

If you're looking for a dog in future either look at rescues or spend your time finding a reputable breeder.

Titective · 17/01/2020 11:22

You can file a small claim via moneyonline. Takes about 15 minutes. If the money isn't in your bank account by 3pm today you'll file it.

TheTrollFairy · 17/01/2020 12:20

I am not a dog owner by any stretch but I am astounded that you paid a deposit after visiting the house to see the pup and you wasn’t shown the mum. This is a massive red flag to being a backstreet breeder!!
I have also done roughly 3 minutes of googling the breed to see that both dogs come with a whole host of health issues which is more than likely transfer to a pup cross of these breeds.

Please make sure you research, research and more research if you do get a dog in the future. Speak to vets, speak to dog owners, and join Facebook pages which are for owners of that particular breed of dog!!

MrsBethel · 17/01/2020 12:45

Wow, this seller is an idiot. 'Non-refundable' means she can keep the deposit if you change your mind. If she changes her mind, she absolutely has to give you the money back.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 17/01/2020 12:51

@MrsBethel I think it's clear everyone involved is an idiot

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