AIBU me or DH shower time

[Nightflower]

I find it ridiculous!
Me and husband decided to give the kids a bath at 7pm . Usually one of us washes the kids ( all in the tub). If the husband washes them, I take them out one by one and get them ready for bed while DH stay with the rest in the bathroom until I take them all out.
10 to 7 I hear noises in the bathroom ( I was in the bedroom sorting laundry). All the kids in the bathroom playing with soap and water in the sink. Clothes all over their room, a puddle on the floor.
I call DH and quickly explain the situation and ask him to come and help, he said not yet, 10 more min.
I got annoyed I went and gave them all a quick shower and got them ready for bed ( all in- shower, all out- bedroom).
After I go talk to DH and he is annoyed because I didn't told him I am going to give them a bath and I should had waited another 10 min.
I said why to wait, they were naked,in the bathroom.
He said I should had put the clothes back on them and waited 10 more min until 7pm as discussed, because he was watching something on Tv and to wait until 7pm sharp when whatever he was watching finished, and I didn't specified that I will give them a bath or he would come to help.

AINBU to give them a shower since they were ready for it.
AIBU to put clothes on and wait 10 more mins until DH was ready to come and assist me.

I gave them a shower because I can do them all in all out, I couldn't give them a bath alone ( I mean I could one by one but takes ages)
Kids 2yrs, 3 and a half
We usually lock the bathroom ( we obviously forgot this time), but no cleaning products or anything like that. DC can only play with water the hands soap and their toothbrushes.

This is one of the rare and silly things we disagree nevertheless I find it a ridiculous thing to disagree about.

Are you married to Ant Middleton? The only solution is to turn in your number and VW

In today’s climate, missing 10 minutes of a tv show is fine. He could always just watch it on demand as soon as you were done.

I wouldn't wait 10 minutes putting wet clothes on them. I only have 2 kids but they bathed together when they were small or after each other in the same water. It was nearly always me on my own. Do what you have to do but he is being a dick if he can't pause a programme for 10 minutes. That's what catch up is for!

I would have popped them both in the bath and sat on the ( closed !) loo and had a chat with them . I used to take the older one out first and wrap him in a towel then lifted the other out ; it doesn’t take much organisation to bath two kids . Then the next night I would have let him do them while I put my feet up or walked the dog x

But there are three children

YANBU. The bathing arrangements you and your husband have settled on are none of anyone else’s business - sounds like they usually work fine. Your husband is bonkers if he thought getting them all dressed again for a bath 10 minutes later was a sensible idea.

I'm a bit confused why you can't bath the 2 kids on your own?! You should be able to bath them by yourself. A bit daft you need your husbands help for that, and same for him if he can't do it himself.

But, he was being unreasonable insisting you wait 10 mins, it makes no sense.

3 kids

I think you're over-thinking this. Yes you showered them and got them in bed - so why didn't you sink into your seat feet up in front of your choice on the TV and demand being waited on hand and foot by DH for NOT helping with the bath to make up?
(That's what I'd have done)

Wow! TWO kids! I thought you were going to say you had about 12!

THREE KIDS

THREE kids don't need two adults to carry out bath time. Can't understand the drama.

There are 3 kids and OP was questioning whether she was unreasonable to shower all of them alone or should she have waited for her husband?

Clearly she was not unreasonable and husband is a divvy if he thinks redressing 3 wriggly toddlers for the sake of ten minutes is what should be done.

*@HerRoyalFattyness

You miss the point by miles. My "moaning" wasn't about him finishing watching his tv programme. I had no problem giving the kids a shower on my own.
The AIBU was him being upset for me giving the kids a shower rather than put the clothes back on them,only to take them off 10 min later when agreed shower time*

Quote from OP, she wasn't moaning about showering them alone.

spongejack

I know she wasn't moaning about showering them alone. She was questioning if she was unreasonable to do so because her husband had said she should have waited.

I've no idea why you tagged me in that.

This is a mad thread.

OP, your DP is a bit too militant by rigidly sticking to 7pm at any cost, but then I can see why he'd ask for 10 more mins if he was engrossed in watching something. But he is unreasonable for being annoyed that you pushed on without him, it hardly makes a difference for him to miss bath time for one evening.

I think you are also overreacting, just because the kids were naked didn't mean they either immediately had to be bathed or re-dressed. If you had really wanted his help you could have left them playing for those 10 mins.

If you had really wanted his help you could have left them playing for those 10 mins.

But she didn’t really want his help she was happy to shower them? It is her DH who was annoyed because he missed bath time. It sounds like the kids were ready for their bath and had got themselves undressed and were running playing with water in the bathroom. Why the hell should three small kids have to wait 10 minutes (naked and wet) for their bath, just because daddy wants to watch 10 extra minutes of tv but also doesn’t want to miss one night of bath time??

OP, re locking door and Bog brush, you need to explain the dangers to your kids (germs from bottoms etc) and tell them no if they go near it. Remove, rinse, repeat. Locking the door makes it forbidden fruit as someone else has said. You need boundaries , and for your kids to listen to you and do what you ask, in relation to Most of parenting so a good place to start. Even at 2, you can get a child to understand that a big brush is dirty and not a toy.

Re three kids and not able to bath regularly on your own, I feel for you here. In my experience, parents of twins are so traumatised by the initial shock of having two and that never wears off. Bathing two babies would be tricky without nbath seats etc. Feeding two babies, try8g to get them to sleep at the sam time. I can see why it sends people a bit nuts. But what I’ve also seen is that very real belief that you need two parents for everything bleed into an age group where it no longer applies. At two and three and a half, yoU can both do this alone. I have regularly had 3/4 kids in my care in the bath toegher at that age and it’s fine. But you need to instil discipline so that they do as you ask otherwise it will be mayhem (as it would with two kids who don’t listen).

Maybe a chat wit your husband is in order. The days of needing two parents for everything are gone and that should be liberating. Embrace it and work out how to carve things up so you each get a bit of down time (the telly programme) or just time to do other stuff like cook your own dinner, or do other chores.

I STILL don't get why he would be angry about not having to bath them. Surely watching TV is far preferable to bathing 3 toddlers?? Is he a madman?

Doesn’t everyone have a pause button on their TVs

Doesn’t everyone have a pause button on their TVs

No.

@Copperleaves thank you, It seems a lot of people missed my multiple response about how many kids I have.

@Dividingthementalload we try to teach DD2 about dangerous/germs and everything in between. It works wonders and very easily with some and not so great with others but she will get there.
I am not ermm lets say traumatized for having twins ( beside the initial shock at the scan ) Feeding was a nightmare until they started solids but that's another story. Bath time had to be with the help of my husband at beginning because my twins wouldn't stay away from each other, they had a very close bond at the beginning and they were pretty much synchronized they were sleeping in the same time got hungry at the same time even now they are mostly synchronized but totally different personalities and they have no problem playing with other kids or being separated.

For the 30th time and last, because it makes no point to those who won't read it. I am very capable to bath DCs on my own that was no the AIBU question, husband watching tv was no a problem. AIBU was about putting the clothes back on the kids only to take them off 10 min later ( that was the part I found U and ridiculous )

Bath/shower should come before watching the last 10 minutes of some shit. I'd be pissed off at him tbh if he didn't come up when I insisted.

Hell no

Doesn’t everyone have a pause button on their TVs

Eh ? - no - that's why seeing the last 10 minutes is important!

Nah...the last 10 minutes of the programme comes first. The kids were happy enough playing and it could wait.