Alcohol Anxiety help

[CH79]

Hi

Title says it all really.
I feel so awful after having a night out. My anxiety is horrendous. I feel so upset. Ashamed of myself. Just awful. Guilty. This lasts for a few days.
I don't go out particularly often, but when I do I don't know when to stop.
I feel like I've let my husband down today. But for no obvious reason. I feel guilty for enjoying myself.
I didn't do anything wrong, I just drank quite a lot. I hate myself today.
Why do i feel like this?
Is stopping drinking the only way to stop this?
Am I the only one who feels like this?
I feel like I need to talk to someone. But not sure what I'd say.
I feel everyone is judging me, when in fact they probably don't give a toss.

Advice please.

I’m glad you feel a bit better OP. We are all here to chat and support you so catch up with us after the school run and let us know how it goes - it will be fine, this is just Sunday evening blues. You will feel much better tomorrow when you have been a couple of days alcohol free.

I totally understand how you feel. I got horrendously drunk on NYE (much worse than you are describing) and really upset my family. It was accidental, I didn’t even think I drank much but nearly the whole evening is a blackout and based on past behaviour in this kind of state I have been worrying so much about what I said or did since then. I only know I fell over a lot but I am sure it must be worse than that. I have been beating myself up in my head constantly for the last 11 days :( I want to give up completely. Have been thinking about it for ages and the time feels right. Have already been made to feel guilty by my two closest friends for trying to change. One of them is angry that I am not going to her birthday drinks next week which I understand but I feel literally traumatised and just can’t face it. And my other friend told me I would be boring if I gave up alcohol. All my social life is based around drinking, but despite all this, I want to become a different and better person this year and I know I can’t control my drinking once I start. I have had three serious accidents through drinking too over the years. No one thinks it is a real problem though as I am not addicted and only binge drink every three months or so, but I know it is a problem deep down and I will be a happier, healthier person without this negative thing in my life. Hope you are feeling better soon. And that you find the solution that is right for you.

Weirdly I was always fine if in house but would get the fear after a night out. I took a year sober and now only drink in the house and not often, I realised I much preferred my nights out when sober!

and my other friend told me I would be boring if I gave up alcohol.

I recommend you read alan carr's book too- "the easy way to control alcohol"- he covers other people's reactions to not drinking aswell. Anyone who thinks you cant have fun without alcohol is truly pathetic - people aren't fun when they're drunk- theyre frequently boorish, slurry and full of their own stupid opinions and arrogance. To find out just how "interesting" and "fun" people are when drunk, try being the only sober one amongst a group of drunk people- its tedious as heck watching them all spout on about their opinions whilst swaying and tipping their drinks over everyone. Hardly "fun".

OP- SLAPS YOU

well- you did ask
Noone on the school run cares!

@beautifulstranger101 😂 thanks! I needed it!
In my rational mind I know they don't give a toss! But that's anxiety for you eh! 😂

@Mummadeeze I completely get you. I've not told anyone I want to cut down/stop. But I'm anticipating similar reactions to yourself.
We're probably pretty similar!
Good luck!

@Annasgirl I'm sure it'll be fine, I'm just worrying over nothing... I'll let you all know!

The not drinking when out can be hidden well, when you buy your drink just make it look like alcohol, a vodka and lemonade looks exactly like a lemonade! Get fizzy water in a wine glass etc. The most important thing is your mental health, who cares if people don't like the non alcohol drinking you? I admit I'm disappointed when my friends don't drink when we go out, but maybe it's just because I find them boring anyway or because I'm boring! 😂

Listen to the lyrics of the song "joy" by Bastille, it's literally a song about having The Fear- it's super common and mine defo got worse as I got older. Things that helped me were a) getting up and doing something the next day - don't wallow in your hangover b) stick to one type of drink and no shots c) down a few pints of water through the night d) remind yourself that it is temporary, caused by booze, and you only need to get through 48 hours. If I woke up with the fear on a sat I would say to myself "okay you are not allowed to panic, and if you still feel this bad on Monday you can worry" and then just do productive things to feel better!

I just eventually drank less because I couldn't cope with the fear anymore 🙈

@Annasgirl it went fine... Nobody said anything.
I'm still anxious, but not as bad. 👍

👍