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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Holiday Kids Club

131 replies

cjt110 · 09/01/2020 11:47

We are off on holiday in August and the place we have chosen has a fantastic kids club. We've only done 1 kids club before and it was quite poor - very unorganised, someone who spoke little English and didn't really have a schedule set for the children.

This place looks brilliant and boasts qualified staff, endless activities etc.

I was telling my Mum about it and she said "well, as long as he spends some time with you"

I was a little put out by that comment. Afterall, we will be holidaying as a family. If he chooses to go to the kids club daily and is happy then that's fine by us. Rather than than him wanting to go, us refusing and us all having a miserable time. The same if he didn't want to go and wanted to stay with us... we would never force him to do the opposite of what he wants.

So I suppose my question is... If DS (who will b aged 6) wants to spend his time at the kids club rather than with us, are we bad parents? We will of course be with him morning, evening and nighttime for meals if he is at the kids club.

YABU - Yes, allowing him to go to a kids club all day if he chooses is a bad thing and he should be limited with his access.

YANBU - No, let him go if he chooses to, it's fine.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 09/01/2020 11:50

This is about you really and how you feel isn't it?

If it wasn't, you wouldn't need the reassurance of the internet.

If your child wants to go to the kids club, why wouldn't you let him? It's just alike any other activity Confused

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 11:52

Its just my Mum commenting how she did - very unlike her.

If he wants to go he can go, if he doesnt he doesnt have to. Totally down to him. Afterall its his holiday too

OP posts:
kierenthecommunity · 09/01/2020 11:55

He’s six, unless he’s exceptional he’s not going to want to sit about on a sun lounger all day. It sounds great fun for him and a break for you. Surely you deserve some downtime too? Otherwise it’s just like any other day but just in the sun, and not a holiday

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 11:59

@kierenthecommunity That was my thinking but my Mum making the comment she did made me perhaps think we were in the wrong.

OP posts:
RicStar · 09/01/2020 12:01

Ours wouldn't want to go all day esp ds who would be very happy playing by a sun lounger. Ours do plenty of that type of kids activity childcare at home in the holidays while we are working so are happiest to hang / explore with us on holiday. Even if we would rather they weren't sometimes! But I have no issue with kids clubs- if they do cool activities and your ds wants to go then sounds great. I am sure you will all have a lovely time. If grandma is unsure I an sure she could have ds for a few days while you have a total break!

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 12:04

@RicStar He does lots of stuff, very active kid, very active player... We shall see. As I say, we've never really used a kids club before so don't know what it willbe lik. The limited one we did, he loved. spent time with them (about an hour a day) and we enjoyed his enjoyment of it, aswell as some time to ourselves!

OP posts:
tashakg89 · 09/01/2020 12:16

My two kids (5 and 4 and the time) loved the kids club on holiday last year. They did a two hour slot on the morning and a two hour slot on the afternoon. sometimes they did one, sometimes both, they'd still have many hours spent as a family. there was one lady who worked there who they absolutely loved and they still talk about her on a weekly basis 7 months on.

CripsSandwiches · 09/01/2020 12:18

It really depends on what you guys want as a family. For us a holiday is a time for us all to do things together - we have lovely quality time doing things we don't normally do. Kids can do kids club type things back at home when DH is at work.

If DS was desperate to go to kids club I'd let him but I admit I'd prefer to do things all together as a family. I do have a friend though who works a very stressful job and says she needs the kids club to give her a brief break just in the morning then they do things together in the afternoon - that's fine I wouldn't think to judge how she does things.

TeeniefaeTinseltoon · 09/01/2020 12:21

I love the kids club, I put my son there in the afternoon so he is out of the sun when it's at it's hottest. He loves going too.

NomNomNomNom · 09/01/2020 12:23

I have to say I can't imagine sending the kids there all day long. My friend's kids were desperate to go to her hotel kids club (she later realised they were allowed to play iPads all day!). I'd let them maybe go in the morning then do things together as a family in the afternoon. I wouldn't give up those family memories as a kid.

InACheeseAndPickle · 09/01/2020 12:27

Surely he won't be there all day long anyway? Mine have never enjoyed it and we love going on trips and doing things altogether - that's why we go away but then even without DC we never did sitting around by the pool. I imagine if that's what's you're doing the kids would probably be more entertained in the kids club.

Newbie1999 · 09/01/2020 12:35

A couple of hours would be fine but I’d also want to spend time with them. So I’d let them just for the afternoon session when it’s hottest, and make sure we were also doing something fun (playing in pool etc) in the morning.

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 12:41

We've picked a beachfront resort that has all sorts of watersports and things to do and im happy sitting and playing on the beach all day with him. But he is also very high needs so a day at the beach is exhausting at times.

OP posts:
InDubiousBattle · 09/01/2020 12:55

If a day at the beach is exhausting wouldn't all day at a club with activities be even more so? If he's only had one (bad!)experience of holiday clubs how come he's so desperate to go to this one? We prefer to do stuff together on holiday and no way I'd want them in kids club all day, but if you're ds really wants to go and you're happy then it's not any of your mum's business. Do you have to book and pay for it or can you play it by ear?

InDubiousBattle · 09/01/2020 12:56

Your ds even.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 09/01/2020 13:02

I have fond memories of kids club on holidays. It was a couple of hours morning and afternoon. I didn't go everyday as sometimes we had day trips etc, but if we had nothing planned and I fancied it I was allowed. My brother didn't like it and didn't go as often.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 09/01/2020 13:02

I would wonder why he wanted to go every single day. Is it because you will plan to sit by a pool/sunbathe and don't expect to play with him much?

My DS would never want to go in a kids club, he has enough of childcare when I'm at work. He wants to build sandcastles/play in the water with me

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 13:03

@InDubiousBattle Exhausting for us/me (I have ME so am in a constant state of fatigue anyway) I meant.

He's seen the hotel photos etc and said about the kids club/ Can play by ear I believe

OP posts:
Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 13:06

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland He had made some friends and they were at the kids club (around the pool) We could see him from where we were. I never said he was desperate to go to a kids club. He is excited that there is one and I don't know whether it's a good thing if he chooses to go or not, hence why I asked the question.

OP posts:
Appletreehouse · 09/01/2020 13:07

I think kids clubs are fine, I have very fond memories of the Eurocamp ones, I was very sociable so loved it. But my mum worked part time school hours so I never went to childcare when home and it was a novelty.

With my own children I prefer to spend most of our holidays together as our time is precious, although a couple of sessions in a weeks holiday isn't going to do any harm.

Original poster
cjt110 · 09/01/2020 13:09

He doesn't have any current childcare - school, us and my Mum. He absolutely loved going to the out of school club in the summer because he got to play all day, go on outings and be with his friends all day having fun

OP posts:
notacooldad · 09/01/2020 13:12

It really depends on what you guys want as a family. For us a holiday is a time for us all to do things together - we have lovely quality time doing things we don't normally do. Kids can do kids club type things back at home when DH is at work
I have heard comments about they can do kids club back at home but theres different opportunities and activities when on hoiday abroad. Mine like making new friends from different countries.
My children went ice climbing and shelter building in mountains on one of the kids clubs. I couldn't do that after school in Southport and dad was back at work!

I think there is a good compromise to be had if your child wants to go. We often sent ours in the morning and then we had all afternoon and evening to have family time. Sometimes they wanted to go to an afternoon one if something special was happening and that was fine it was their holiday to and they wanted to do fun things!

BiddyPop · 09/01/2020 13:17

YANBU

He is staying in the same accommodation as you, I assume, so will have lots of time with you. Meals, evenings, mornings etc. Kids clubs are normally only a few hours in the mornings and afternoons - not all day and not all evening. (I know some may do evening sessions or discos).

But also, parents need to unwind on holidays too (by the pool, reading a book, having a spa treatment, enjoying a quiet beer, sneaky afternoon cuddles together!!) - and DCs often have great fun in kids clubs meeting other DCs and making new friends. While being a parent involves a lot of "being about the DCs", it is not ALL about the DCs.

Ignore "D"M.

Mumdiva99 · 09/01/2020 13:18

my kids have always hated kids club type activities - both at home and abroad. They want to be with us and spend time with us. However, other friends/family have kids who love a kids club. It's different strokes and all that. The difference with mine as well is that I have 3 not that dissimilar in age so they automatically have play mates to do stuff with. That being said - we have been some places where the kids clubs look great and I'm sure if they actually tried it they would enjoy it.

misspiggy19 · 09/01/2020 13:21

I would wonder why he wanted to go every single day. Is it because you will plan to sit by a pool/sunbathe and don't expect to play with him much?

^I agree with this. Never understood people who go on holiday just to stick their kids in a kids club for the whole duration.