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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Holiday Kids Club

131 replies

cjt110 · 09/01/2020 11:47

We are off on holiday in August and the place we have chosen has a fantastic kids club. We've only done 1 kids club before and it was quite poor - very unorganised, someone who spoke little English and didn't really have a schedule set for the children.

This place looks brilliant and boasts qualified staff, endless activities etc.

I was telling my Mum about it and she said "well, as long as he spends some time with you"

I was a little put out by that comment. Afterall, we will be holidaying as a family. If he chooses to go to the kids club daily and is happy then that's fine by us. Rather than than him wanting to go, us refusing and us all having a miserable time. The same if he didn't want to go and wanted to stay with us... we would never force him to do the opposite of what he wants.

So I suppose my question is... If DS (who will b aged 6) wants to spend his time at the kids club rather than with us, are we bad parents? We will of course be with him morning, evening and nighttime for meals if he is at the kids club.

YABU - Yes, allowing him to go to a kids club all day if he chooses is a bad thing and he should be limited with his access.

YANBU - No, let him go if he chooses to, it's fine.

OP posts:
NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 09/01/2020 13:22

Sorry OP missed your last post.

Is he quite social? If he's an only one maybe its the opportunity to make friends that appeals to him.

BiddyPop · 09/01/2020 13:23

DD used to go for maybe 2 sessions in kids clubs when we went to Centre Parcs. As she liked having some fun and doing some crafts with them. But sent a lot of time with us.

We always brought a deck of cards, and would play a lot of games with her, and later just ourselves when she was in bed. Walks in the forest. Have a drink next to a playground so she could run and enjoy and come in and out to us (we'd get a seat outdoors in her eyeline). Get her to help make meals with us. Lots of swimming. …...etc.

But those precious couple of hours when DH and I had time to ourselves, as both working FT, were lovely too.

cjt110 · 09/01/2020 13:26

I agree with this. Never understood people who go on holiday just to stick their kids in a kids club for the whole duration. Nowhere have I said this and it is based solely on whether he wants to go or not... his decision.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland Yes very. he made 2 friends on the last holiday - a Russian boy and a Swedish boy - neither of whom spoke English and he obviously doesn't speak Russian or Swedish and they all had a ball together.

Quite looking forward to taking him out on the kayaks and catamarans and simply building sandcastles with him

OP posts:
Salene · 09/01/2020 13:29

I wouldn't ever send my children to a kids on holiday as holidays are about family time, so I make sure we are always doing stuff that everyone enjoys. For us holidays are for making memories together as a family. Also I'm not keen on living my children with total strangers who are 100% responsible to keep them safe in a foreign country, it doesn't sit right with me.

rhowton · 09/01/2020 13:30

We specifically choose hotels that have crèches 😂! Yes it's a family holiday but I'm with these fuckers 24/7 at home, I need a break too! We've got a holiday booked in May that has 1-5 crèche with fully qualified English staff with TUI and I cannot wait! My husband and I will have lunch first, then sunbathe and then prob have a quick shag before getting the kids!! They also love kids club and being entertained! I'm a terrible (yet tanned and full) parent on holiday

Salene · 09/01/2020 13:30

Ignore my spelling errors, I hope you understand what I meant

IndecentFeminist · 09/01/2020 13:31

I would want a mixture personally, a few days in kids club if they wanted it and we were happy with the standards there, and a few days hanging out together. Part of the joy of a holiday is spending time together out of routine, hanging out in the pool, doing and seeing different stuff etc.

5foot5 · 09/01/2020 13:32

Comes down to personal choice I think.

When DD was small we both worked full time so she went to a private nursery during the day. Hence, when we were away on holiday as a family one of the key things for us was spending as much time together as possible. I wouldn't have wanted to put her in a holiday kids club because that would just have been another version of what she was used to at home, but probably not as good because it was unfamiliar. Being able to spend all day every day with her was a good part of the holiday.

However, I can imagine that for a SAHM and her children, holiday clubs probably are a treat for all concerned.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 09/01/2020 15:30

I think if he's an only one & not in childcare at home, and he does have the option of having fun with you, it's his choice, isn't it. Its not like hes a 2 yr old being dropped there day in day out with no choice.

I think I would probably try and insist on a couple of days spent together but that's just me because I work full time & so family holidays are about the only time we get together.

Iloveacurry · 09/01/2020 15:34

Ignore your mum. My two are 9 and 11, so are getting a bit beyond kids clubs, but in the past they’ve both enjoyed time in kids club for a few hours here and there. They enjoyed it, and you get a hour or two kid free time.

Doubleraspberry · 09/01/2020 15:38

We go to a place with a kids club that runs for most of the day. My kids bolt their breakfast and demand to go there immediately. They will happily spend hours there - there’s soft play, craft activities, walks and other outings, a disco etc. They demand to go back there every year. We have days on which we go out together as a family and they only spend a bit of time there after dinner, and lazy days (for us) when they are there pretty much all the time barring meals. I feel no guilt - they have amazing holidays and spend as much time with us as they like.

mogtheexcellent · 09/01/2020 15:46

I get this with DD. Shes an only child so we always make sure there is good activities for her to mix with other kids if she wants to. My thought is she would be an odd child if she only hung around with us all the time.

Lippy1234 · 09/01/2020 15:46

I went on a lot of holidays with kids clubs (Mark Warner) when my DC we’re young and the holidays worked really well. As the DC got older and easier we stopped using kids club or booking holidays that had them or booked ones that has kids clubs for a short period of time. I never felt any guilt, we all had nice holidays, the DC did lots of activities with other children such as mini tennis tournaments and watersports, arts and crafts as well as the usual swimming type of stuff with us. My DH and I learnt to sail and waterski and also had adults nights out.

Mia1415 · 09/01/2020 15:53

I wouldn't ever send my children to a kids on holiday as holidays are about family time, so I make sure we are always doing stuff that everyone enjoys. For us holidays are for making memories together as a family. Also I'm not keen on living my children with total strangers who are 100% responsible to keep them safe in a foreign country, it doesn't sit right with me.

I feel exactly the same way. To me holidays are about precious family time and making memories together.

okiedokieme · 09/01/2020 15:55

I'm with your mum. I never dumped my kids in kids club because we went on holiday to spend time as a family. Occasionally they did a sports activity as they got older but I don't like noisy resorts anyway so we went to more unusual places anyway

okiedokieme · 09/01/2020 15:57

Ps of course kids don't want to sit by a sun lounger but neither do I, my idea of hell - we went sightseeing and exploring with ours, at 6 dd loved Venice

WorraLiberty · 09/01/2020 16:01

I never left my kids in kids clubs because they never showed any interest in them.

However, whenever there's a thread about them, someone always uses the word 'dumped' and I think that's pretty insulting to the parents who allow their kids to go, if they really want to.

Surely it doesn't have to be one or the other? Some kids will go for a couple of hours or even a day, maybe once in the whole holiday. As long as it's what the child wants, there's no 'dumping' to be seen.

Kab30 · 09/01/2020 16:07

Rhowton ....I love it...im with you all the way 🥂🥂🤣

snappycamper · 09/01/2020 16:23

He doesn't have any current childcare - school, us and my Mum.

If your mum's doing a significant portion of after school childcare, picking him up from school etc like lots of grannies do, she's probably surprised that you don't want to maximise family time on holidays.

myself2020 · 09/01/2020 16:25

We always choose hotels with kids clubs, and they have to go to at least one session. i have no time to myself (as in NO - no convenient inlaws to do babysitting etc), i have earned 2 hours of me time per year!!!

PrincessHoneysuckle · 09/01/2020 16:49

Yanbu.Ds 5 went to the kids club constantly in Greece last year.Big air conned room with outside space which was shaded from the son.He went 10-12.30 or 3-5.30 or sometimes both! Me and dh got go on the adult water slides in the morning and have sex in the afternoon.Was great Grin

PrincessHoneysuckle · 09/01/2020 16:50

Sun not son.Can I add that ds asked to go in the kids club,we didn't just palm him off Grin

PrincessHoneysuckle · 09/01/2020 16:52

@Mia1415 we got loads of precious family time on holiday.Ds wanted to spend time with other kids.

Booboooo · 09/01/2020 16:53

Rhowton. Can i ask what hotel? I have a 18month old and a 5 year old and would love a kids club that took both of them.

Cohle · 09/01/2020 16:53

I think it's a little disingenuous to pretend it's all his choice. He's six. He wouldn't even know a kids club existed unless you introduce him to it. He can hardly take himself off there without you.

I don't really understand the point of going abroad as a family just to send your kid to poor quality child care though.

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