Boys in ballet - really fucking annoyed

[Boyscandoballettoo]

Please excuse the ranty tone of this thread - I have just had enough! Took my male toddler to a ballet class, and the number of negative comments or comments laughing about it from so-called family and friends has been overwhelming.

Please can people tell me AIBU to think it’s a bloody unisex sport?!? There have always been male ballet dancers! I do NOT understand the ignorance over it and even if it were a female sport traditionally, how dare people be so bloody sexist and make fun of a boy for joining in.

I don’t know why but it’s really pushing my buttons!

Such a long thread, and I’ve just skimmed over the last half.

I like what BirdintheWings said (at 07.51): her DS mentioned at army selection camp that he had GCSE in dance, and got the response, “Should be fit enough for this then, sonny”.

And what MAFIL said: I bought him a t shirt for his birthday that said something like "If ballet was easy it would be called football".

On another thread, someone posted a link to a newspaper article about a male professional dancer who successfully completed one of the “SAS: Who Dares Win” series.

It’s appalling that such sexist stereotypes still exist in 2020 (and it’s probably getting worse).

Some of the most amazing ballet dancers I’ve ever seen were male! YANBU please don’t stop your sons ballet classes because of narrow minded idiots.

This really pisses me off! I teach performing arts including ballet and you wouldn’t believe how many young boys quit because horrible children bully them because they dance! Ballet is very physically demanding and I would love to see these people who laugh at it try it! People are so ignorant, don’t talk shit about something you know nothing about! Forget the sexist narrow minded people op, dance has been proven to be beneficial for mental and well as physical health and if he enjoys it keep him at it!

YANBU I've watched Billy Elliott 20 times and the end bit about 40 times.

Adam Cooper

I get this from family and friends .. Dd 22m is not a stereotypical girl. Imagine she's the one at a park, all Kids playing nicely the girls being dainty.. She's launching herself down the hill the slide is on.. Face plants the floor and laughs.
I said I'd imagine she's better suited to rugby tots or football, both local more than the ballet or gym tots.

All. I get is she's a girl she should be doing a dance blah blah.

She really wouldn't be suited even her personality wouldn't

I ignore them. And when space is available I'll give her a taster of it..

I love watching Tom Holland (aka Spider-Man) dancing, he was I'm Billy Elliott and is a brilliant dancer. Some people are just pricks

People are weird about stuff like this. I hope your son doesn't pick up on your family's attitude towards this. It would be a shame if he stopped doing something that he enjoys just because of stereotypes

Rude and contemptuous people always come as a surprise to me too, OP.
I have never been able to understand quite what they get out of being nasty to children.

Amazing performance by Sergei Polonin, to Hozier’s Take Me to Church

How pathetic of anyone snickering at a boy doing ballet. Having just watched The Nutcracker and Swan Lake the Male (and female) ballerinas were awe inspiring and completely amazing. Just give the uncultured oafs a swift cat's bottom mouth and ignore.

My husband works for a ballet company and those men (and women) are crazy strong and fit. The strength required is unbelievable.

You will always get narrow minded people but if they spent 5 minutes with a male ballet dancer and appreciated what’s involved I doubt they would be laughing at them.

I get this from family and friends .. Dd 22m is not a stereotypical girl. Imagine she's the one at a park, all Kids playing nicely the girls being dainty.. She's launching herself down the hill the slide is on.. Face plants the floor and laughs.
I said I'd imagine she's better suited to rugby tots or football, both local more than the ballet or gym tots

Don’t rule out dance :)

I thought the same about my dd. Football and rugby though didn’t suit at all- i get the theory but in reality she was the child careering round trying to kick the ball as far as she could while lines of little boys waited patiently for their turn to dribble the ball round the cone and listened politely to the instructions. She lasted 10mins before getting bored.

So i switched to toddler gymnastics instead- which is basically hurling yourself off stuff, swinging and climbing. But still she struggled with following the minimal instructions.

So i tried ballet too. Toddler ballet is herding cats and getting them all to copy a teacher. Gradually though it taught her control, coordination and and discipline :).

Toddler ballet is herding cats and getting them all to copy a teacher. Gradually though it taught her control, coordination and and discipline

This is put so perfectly!

Check out a group called My Boy Can on Facebook, it was set up by a friend of mine after her young lad faced prejudice after starting dance classes etc.
She's a fantastic human being and I think they're at nearly 75K members now so lots of advice and support on there x

Yanbu to be annoyed with these idiotic small minded attitudes.

Yabu for calling ballet a sport! It's a classical art form - there are lots of very physically demanding arts - circus disciplines for example which are insanely hard.

Let's not reinforce the stereotype of boys/active/sports, girls/creative/arts.

@Babamamananarama

I think of it as a sport in terms of women doing it too. If I had a daughter i would still call it a sport!

No-one ever refers to Darcey Bussell or Francesca Hayward or even Oti Mabuse as athletes or sportsmen. They are dancers. As are all male dancers. If I go to a dance show whether it ballet or street dance or one of the many SCD spinoffs, I’m going to a performance, not a sporting event.

There’s no need to try and butch up the image of dance by calling it a sport or the dancers athletes.

There’s no need to try and butch up the image of dance by calling it a sport or the dancers athletes

Please don’t presume to
Know my reasons behind calling it a sport or the dancers athletes. I’ve explained myself several times upthread. Google or several posters here will
Explain to you it’s a contentious issue and actually often debated.

Nobody is trying to 'butch' up dancing by calling it a sport. It's simply a recognition of the athleticism it takes to become a top level dancer particularly if you dance competitively.

If you think that's why people are calling it a sport you need to look at your own unconscious biases and issues around stereotyping.

There’s no need to try and butch up the image of dance by calling it a sport or the dancers athletes

Suggesting that sport is "butch" is your own biases showing.

I work in dance and I don't think it's a contentious issue that ballet is not a sport...

I suppose there is a grey area is dance competitions where dancers are scored. And ice dancing, which is a sport.

Ballet = not a sport though.

Ballet is seriously tough at elite level, ballet dancers just as strong and fit as any other elite sports participants. YANBU. My dd plays football and I've had a couple of sexist comments from older family members. I'm determined that my kids sex won't be a barrier to anything, I've got an academic dd interested in stem and football and an artistic ds. I do think that we're moving towards equality of opportunity, but it's a long slow journey..

The competitive side of ballroom and Latin is called Dancesport, purely because it meant they could access the sport funding pots rather than the arts ones!

I still think it's an art though. You can compete in music/painting/poetry competitions as well, it doesn't stop them from being arts. Dancing just happens to be more physical!

I teach competitive Irish dance. It is a sport. The kids in my class are there to compete and everything they learn and train for is about the competition. Apart from the odd at Patrick's Day performance ( where they dance their competition stuff anyway) most have them have never performed for performance sake. They train like athletes, care about nutrition, use sports therapists and physios etc.
It absolutely is a sport

Many footballers take ballet classes to improve physical capabilities.